Some readers have alerted us to sightings of recently-freed actor Christian Slater — he's already back on the streets (Hell's Kitchen, we hear), just days after his ass-grabbing escapades, so do be careful out there. While we stock up on pepper spray and pocket tasers, one reader has some lingering thoughts about Slater's choice of venues:
We don't know what got into us, but last night we did the unthinkable: We trekked to the Upper-Upper East-East Side, ground zero for a night of drinking and ass-grabbing that resulted in Christian Slater's arrest. The above photo, taken at Slater haunt Brother Jimmy's* and then sent to our lab for scientific analysis, just might shed a little light on where it all went wrong.
Oh my: It seems that Christian Slater has yet to go blind from his love of recreational Cialis, as the actor was arrested last night on charges of third-degree sexual abuse. Slater allegedy "groped" a woman's buttocks on 93rd and 3rd Avenue around 1:50 AM last night; the woman then reported the incident to the police. Shortly thereafter, the authorities found Slater near the scene of the crime and the victim ID'd Slater as the man behind the bad touch. Slater maintains his innocence, but was (admirably) piss drunk at the time of his arrest. No word on whether or not the buttocks in question were tight or hot.
In an explicable fit of service journalism, we'd like to take a minute to discuss the always pertinent issue of ass-kicking. More specifically, we'd like you to see this inspiring video, in which a woman fights off a purse-snatcher (who, as a result, might never walk again). It is, in a word, awesome.
On Monday, we linked to cockeyed.com's list of anticipated terror attacks. As they put it, "The report from the 911 Commission cited a 'lack of imagination' as a reason that the World Trade Center hijackattack was not averted." Eager to help, we presented a few possibilities they may have missed yesterday.
1. "A man who arranged to meet a 'woman' for oral sex in an Upper East Side apartment got more than he bargained for first, the hooker turned out to be a man, then 'she' stabbed him, and finally, 'her' roommate sprayed him with Mace, police said."
2. They met online in a chat room.
3. "She" was 18 and living in an illegal sublet.
4. The tranny was paid $100 by the man, 37-year-old Glenn McDowell, for a blow-job.
5. It was 3:30 in the afternoon. On a Tuesday.
6. When the tranny refused to have sex with him, McDowell turned vaguely "violent."
7. Stabbing! Mace! Fluids!
8. The tranny and "her" roommate "looked like two fat girls. You wouldn't be able to tell if either of them was a man."
Yesterday, in the interests of full preparedness, we linked to this list of hypothetical terrorist plans and targets. We must remain vigilant and watchful, after all. The list is far-reaching, covering everything from "Terrorists might send pretzels to the president" to "Terrorists might hijack a Sausage & Cheese cart and slowly destroy the economy of the mall" to the truly terrifying "Terrorists might poison the supply of methamphetamines in the US." Unfortunately, no list of this nature can ever be truly complete. We've thought of a few they missed, and present them here in the hopes that these tragedies may be avoided.
As any young woman in the big, scary city knows, we live with the constant (and mildly exciting, admit it) threat of danger. Your next ho-hum trip to Duane Reade could be your last! Maybe you've taken a self-defense class (or, like me, your parents forced you to take Krav Maga) or carry pepper spray, but wouldn't it save a lot of time if we'd all just suck it up and buy a kick-ass weapon?
Former Law & Order D.A. Dianne Wiest and her 17-year-old daughter Emily went to Criminal Court yesterday to face charges that the Beekman schoolgirl and two gal-pals had jumped a male classmate and stolen his sunglasses and iPod. An order of protection was issued for the victim and the three girls were released pending further investigation.
For the loyal four of you who were still concerned about the state of New York's princess/actress Natasha Lyonne, an update: She's still batshit insane. After showing up an hour late for yesterday's hearing regarding her December episode in which she threatened to "sexually molest" a neighbor's dog (but seriously, that dog was hot), Lyonne left the court after a mere 30 minutes, before her case was even called. Oh, those pesky starlets — so impatient! So crack-headed!
· After publicly beating his girlfriend on the streets of Soho, Vincent Pastore (aka Big Pussy of Sopranos fame) has yet to take her pics off of his website. [Cityrag]
· The Pulitzer tug-o-war leans to the left coast as the LA Times takes the Gray Lady, 2 to 1. [NYT]
· By revealing each other's blind items, the tabs have turned their warfare into something slightly more subtle. [R&M & Page Six]
· Underground writers need galleries too, y'know. But they also need patrons, presumably, so this whole thing might not fly. [Craigslist]
Q: What do you get when you cross the public school system with an African-American man trying to get his teacher's certification and an overweight white man with Asperger's syndrome?
Robert Blake is not guilty and I'm sitting at MSNBC, waiting for BREAKING BLOG COVERAGE of the Blake verdict. I'm on call, people. I'm in the trenches. And I just pissed on my hands to stay warm.
Update: Nothing doing. But I'll stick around, just in case they need me to say "ah..." and "um..." on camera.
During cross-examination by Jackson defense attorney Thomas Mesereau Jr., the young accuser, a cancer survivor, denied ever speaking directly to Leno but said he once placed a call to the comedian from a hospital and left a message on an answering machine. But in what appears to be a transcript of an interview with officials from the Santa Barbara County Sheriff's Department, Leno appears to contradict the alleged victim's testimony and tells investigators the boy's mother put him on the phone to speak to him. Leno said the conversation made him suspicious. -Jay Leno Appears to Contradict Jackson Accuser [ABC News]
Say what you will about Michael Jackson, he was always an original. Until now.
