Yesterday, in the interests of full preparedness, we linked to this list of hypothetical terrorist plans and targets. We must remain vigilant and watchful, after all. The list is far-reaching, covering everything from "Terrorists might send pretzels to the president" to "Terrorists might hijack a Sausage & Cheese cart and slowly destroy the economy of the mall" to the truly terrifying "Terrorists might poison the supply of methamphetamines in the US." Unfortunately, no list of this nature can ever be truly complete. We've thought of a few they missed, and present them here in the hopes that these tragedies may be avoided.

-Terrorists might put season 3 of the Chappelle show on permanent hiatus.
-Terrorists might pan the new U2 album, throwing all hope of third-world debt relief into disarray.
-Terrorists might limit class mobility in the United States.
-Terrorists might insert gratuitously nasty remarks into pieces by Alessandra Stanley.
-Terrorists might escalate and weaponize the Denton/Roshan feud.

Be prepared, citizens. -AP