Just in time for fashion week, the Daily News does its New York salary roundup. The average income of employed people in Manhattan is, as of 2002, $46,920, by the way.

It seems to me that one of Martha's 400 advisors might suggest that she wear an outfit that costs less than the combined monthly salary of the entire jury pool. Crazy talk? The Daily News takes a look at Martha on the oh-so-chic runway to potential incarceration:

OAN hit the National Board of Review awards at Tavern on the Green the other night, and harassed Sofia Coppola's date, designer Marc Jacobs. Jacobs is playing dumb about February's fashion shows:

The Orange County Weekly has a front-page story on Von Dutch, the racist alcoholic freakazoid inspiration behind Nicole Richie & Co's dreaded trucker hat resurgence. Can't imagine it's really good for the brand that Von Dutch had been known to sign letters "Heil Hitler!"
Swastika Armbands the New Trucker Hat? [tale of two cities]
See also: Von Suck.

In a week or two, IMG's The Daily — last year's new trashy Fashion Week paper — is going online, launching both a fairly intensive website and a daily email newsletter for the sort of people who can't hear enough about preferences in rounded v. pointy-toed boots and the girls who fall off them and lose their teeth. We can only hope it's gonna be all Chloe Sevigny all the time.

I Married Britney Tee [T Shirt Hell, via big fat waste of time]

There's a nice pair of size 7 thigh-high Balenciaga boots for sale on Ebay. The seller reports that she "can no longer wear these boots due to an injury." We can't help but wonder: Chloe Sevigny, famous Balenciaga-toppling tooth-loser, are things that bad?
Balenciaga thigh high boots [Ebay]
News Alert: Chloe Sevigny Loses Four Teeth [A Socialites Life]

Dressing in shades of "ivory, cream and oatmeal" screams "I have money, I can keep what I'm wearing clean," according to a rep from the terrifyingly-named cool-hunting company Promostyl. (Maybe we shouldn't have mocked Vogue's Candy Pratts Price last week for her big flulffy white get-up? Oh sure we should have.)

Jonathan Ames, author and baldness expert, writes in with some exclusive insight into The Trump's hair troubles:

Two conflicting reader reports on Trump's mess of a hairdo:

To: Donald Trump's Toupee
From: Donald Trump's Face
Re: The Forehead

Back in April, we swear we spotted Vogue Editor Anna Wintour wearing supermodel Linda Evangelista's coat. And the coat lives on! A spy writes:

Left: Calvin pissing on Marc Jacobs, sold at Nom de Guerre: more info at No Good For Me.
Center: American Apology shirt.
Right: Yo Semite! From Jewish Fashion Conspiracy.

Even though he recently lost 90 pounds, designer Karl Lagerfeld can't get off the carb train to doom. For the new Scent-themed Visionaire, Lagerfeld contributed a photograph called "Hunger" of a man with bread obscuring his crotch. (Uh...) To salute Lagerfeld, the magazine made up a perfume that smells like a lovely hot and crusty roll. Said Visionaire's Stephen Gan, If he s hungry for bread, he sprays himself with it."

I was just dining on Lincoln Road here in Miami, and while admiring the daring footwear on display, I realized the one thing Miami will always have over New York: It's always too warm here for misguided and sheepish (pun intended) women to wear those hideous Ugg boots. I know you're all planning to wear them for tomorrow's snowstorm. Well, think again.

Christmas is over! Two million bucks worth of perfectly good knock-offs are being burnt in pyres in Chinatown right now. The cops have made vague allegations that counterfeiters are terrorists. Please. The real terrorists are people who keep the "Kate Spade" faux-Hamilton purses away from needy magazine girls.
$2 Million Counterfeit Purse Fence Busted [Gothamist]

Meghan Stiers analyzes five years of Cosmpolitan covers and sees the reason in the madness: "A recent NYT article revealed Cosmopolitan photographer Francesco Scavullo's lifelong struggle with manic depression. Perhaps this is due to shooting the same exact cover for decades?"

Phooey. Some people are such whores. While they wait for the inevitable lawsuit, the gentlemen at ParisHiltonSexTape.com are paying their Hair Club for Men dues by selling t-shirts.

I know you know: Tom Ford and Domenico De Sole are leaving Gucci. It's been brewing for over a week now; last week in The Times, Anna Wintour declared the possibility of Gucci's loss of Ford "a catastrophe." Nearly immediately after the announcement, shares of Pinault-Printemps-Redoute SA fell 6% on the Paris boards. Also several socialites fell over 100% on the Paris streets. Har har har.

Chanel's website has put up a whole load of content: tours with Jeanne Moreau and Karl Lagerfield, an interview with Chanel's "nose," Jacques Polge, and more. In a hilarious interview with Vogue France editor Carine Roitfeld, she confesses how Chanel gave her the courage to wear white shoes in winter and to wear a black bra with a white shirt.