· After Bill Clinton was hospitalized for heart problems, the Learning Annex was forced to reschedule his appearance—but as of yet, a new date has yet to be finalized. Clinton is such an asshole, right? Thanks, Page Six, for clarifying. [Page Six]
· The saga of Brad-Jen-Angelina-April-Your Mom continues: April Florio claims that US Weekly "completely fabricated" quotes from their exclusive interview with the model, and that she's only met Brad Pitt briefly. At this very moment, US's Min-ions© begin the scramble for damage control. [Star]
· While J.Lo is just sick enough to cancel her European engagements, she's still strong enough to star in a Pepsi commercial with Beyonc and David Beckham. The spot, which will air in Madrid, is being described as "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon" meets "Kill Bill" meets "totally ridiculous shit." [R&M (3rd item)]
· Lloyd Grove's phone keeps ringing: this time David Gest is on the line, and he's not bitter about Liza. No, not at all. [Lowdown (2nd item)]
· Mariah Carey is one sentimental lady: she'll wear her old wedding dress (from her failed marriage to Tommy Mattola in 1993) in her likely-to-fail new video. [Scoop (bottom of page)]

Crisis at the Times! Captain Dubious, AKA former Gawker editorial overlord Choire Sicha, has managed to mislead the Gray Lady and poor reporter Sarah Boxer into a scandalous fact-checking debacle:

Left, Kid Rock, post-assault charges hearing February 16, 2005. Right, Robert Mitchum, after two months in the clink on marijuana charges, circa 1948.

In today's Post, Steve Dunleavy spends some quality time with budding celebrity dog, Carlee.

Would you rather quaff Ken Auletta or sip Larry Flynt?

Who knew so many people were so knowledgeable about leather?

The LAW's Nikki Finke reports that Vanity Fair editor/Hollywood snuggle-buddy Graydon Carter is jabbing a salad fork in the back of his entertainment industry buddies on the eve of his splashy Oscar party:

Our sister's placeholder points us towards a new(ish) site imaginatively titled I Disagree With Maureen Dowd, all about the writer's opinions about... David Brooks.

Today's completely out-of-context Judas Priest reference comes courtesy of FOXNews.com's Roger Friedman:

· Condé Nast redefines "international cuisine" so that it means "African-American." We'd write something about minorities-as-foreigners at 4 Times Square, but you're already thinking it. [Lowdown]
· "Often Hargo's The Somerville Gates has been compared with Christo's The Gates, Central Park, New York City. These comparisons have been unfair; sometimes the media has exaggerated — even lied — about the similarities." [Not Rocket Science]
· The Wall Street Journal reaches a new low in depressed, OCD-enabling writing with their piece on how people hate Sunday because of the looming Monday. [WSJ]
· Tonight on Project Runway, the quote of the week: "We were all really nice to you because we felt sorry for you because you're such a terrible designer and like, a mother of however many children and you live in the middle of wherever." [NYT]
· George Michael announces his intentions to "disappear" and, predictably, Drudge gives this news the red headline treatment. [Reuters]

· Yet another chat with James Truman, the man who gave up a job with "a reputed $2m yearly salary, a town-car on 24-hour call, a lifestyle largely picked up on expenses, and imbued him with the power of a cultural seer in city dazzled by the sheen of glamour that Cond Nast confers, it was courageous to give it up." Yes, but his accepting a job as volunteer at a Leper colony? Now that is courageous. [The Independent]

It's after 3PM and we haven't done our court ordered mandatory 'Gates' entry for the day. In today's Times, Nicholas Confessore reports on a widespread cultural theft the likes of which the world has not seen since Iraqi looters pilfered a bunch of dusty old junk. ("My goodness, were there that many vases? Is it possible that there were that many vases in the whole country?," a wise man said at the time.)

From today's Times op-ed page, Bill McKibben on exactly what bears do you know where:

Because he's in college and is thus much, much smarter than we are, resident boy-wonder Henry the Intern has made a keen observation regarding CNBC anchor Maria Bartiromo. It seems that Maria loves nothing more than her iPod, and has been using her time on air to spread the word on this amazing new product:

Because girls watching girl-on-girl television is SO HOT, The Observer is working on a piece about straight women who "love" watching Showtime's lesbidrama, The L Word. The reporter on this "beat" has sent out an email questionnaire looking for possible interview subjects and since Gawker always wants to assist our siblings in "real journalism," I thought I'd try to help:

Did Harper's editor Lewis Lapham change jobs without anyone telling us?

From today's Times corrections:

In this week's New York Observer, Mary Elizabeth Williams breaks down the whole Catholic School Girl thing in an essay about the decline of parochial schools:

Vanity Fair Poll [VF]

Former Parks Commissioner Henry Stern lightens up his opinion on 'The Gates':