John Simon, New York magazine's lead theater critic lo these 37 1/2 years, got the boot from editor Adam Moss yesterday. Simon told BOLDFACE that Moss intends to take theater coverage in a "new direction"—which, judging by the magazine's other bold new initiatives, presumably means intensive coverage of one-woman shows involving teen overspending and the psychosexual implications of rapid weight loss. To be sure, Simon, who never seems to have met a racial minority or gay agenda he liked, will be unmourned in much of the theater community: Playwright and neophyte Huffablogger David Mamet famously remarked that Simon and former Times theater scribe Frank Rich were the syphilis and gonorrhea of the theater world. Simon seems to have, um, picked up that meme himself: "My last review is 'Sweet Charity,' " he told the Times, "Which is ironic."

A great, um, nugget buried at the end of the article:

Everyone, they say, has a novel in him; it's just a question of bringing it out. For Proust, it was the taste of a madeleine that triggered the memories of his childhood and resulted in acres of unforgettable prose. For others, it takes something more exotic, something more obscure something involving Liz Smith (certainly NOT pictured at left.) After the jump, special correspondent Rachel O'Neil transports you to a War and Peace-length summary of the rotund rumormonger's recent appearance on Charlie Rose. You might want to print this one out and take it to the can with you.

And it definitely is not now, nor has it ever been, Drakkar Noir. JO

"An obituary on Friday about Col. David H. Hackworth, a war hero and later a critic of the Vietnam War, misidentified two units he commanded and the helicopters used by American forces in Vietnam. The Wolfhound Raiders were a platoon he led in Korea, not a regiment. In Vietnam, he commanded a battalion of the 101st Airborne Division, not an air cavalry brigade; that battalion flew Huey helicopters, not Black Hawks.

· European and Asian editions of The Wall Street Journal to turn tabloid. Stateside TK, too? "Headless Investor in Bottomless Market!" "Greenspan to Interest Rates: Drop Dead!" Oh, such fun. [NYT]
· After seven months of consideration, a 19-member New York Times panel presents plan to increase credibility: Fewer anonymous sources, clearer distinction between news and opinion, andwait for itfewer factual errors. After one day of consideration, our one-member panel says: Duh. [ NYT]
· At a conference in Nashville, bloggers learn "how to access and analyze government statistics." At a bar in New York, cooler bloggers point and laugh. [AP via CNN]
· The Times once again discovers Gawker Media, er, group. (It's not an empire, insists the emperor.) Groundbreaking observations: More traffic is good! Published authors flack themselves! People selling ads use crazy ad-world terminology! [NYT] JO

Apologies for the delay in announcing the victorious victor in our latest Gawker caption contest — but if we wanted to adhere to deadlines, we'd work for a real newspaper.

Still more breaking news at The Huffington Report! An eminence no less celebrated than Tina Brown has popped her little head in to offer her wisdom to the nascent blog's many readers. Apparently this piece was originally intended for Radar but, well, one can't wait forever, can one? As a former editor, Brown is well aware of the ability of skilled professionals to clean up an essay, even one that consists mainly of bulleted points formatted to look like a deeply thought-out list, and the original draft she turned in bears some slight but noticeable differences from the final project. After the jump, we present Tina's first pass at the piece.

We wanted to read the piece on the Ansonia in the new New York. We really did. We've always thought it's an interesting building to look at. It was also home to the Continental Baths, and, without getting into our feelings on gay bathhouses, any connection to the Divine Miss M sends a shiver up our spine. There's even the whole Plato's Retreat thing. But, stupidly, we stopped first at the table-of-contents page, where we saw this pic of Robin Leach on his way into Plato's. And it'll be tough to read the article now that we've had to gouge out our eyeballs. —JO

Also, she totally looks like a man.

We admit we were skeptical at first, but The Huffington Post turns out to be everything its backers promised: conversational, witty, and up-to-the-minute. Why, here's an excerpt from the most recent entry, by noted historian Arthur Schlesinger, Jr.:

(In Jess s absence, I thought we might branch out a bit.)

Lindsayism: Hey Tommy, when does your next book come out?
Lindsayism: You so have to invite me to the launch party. I ll bring the powdered refreshment.
Pynchyheartsbritney49: I am away from my computer right now.
Lindsayism: Come on! This is for Gawker! Do you know who I am? I m the one-day guest co-editor, dammit!
Pynchyheartsbritney49: I am away from my computer right now.
Lindsayism: Luddite!

Well, this week's New Yorker is on the newsstands, and it's something of a mixed blessing: On the negative side, there's not one word about climate change to be found, which means you'll need to re-up your Ambien prescription if you want to get a decent night's sleep this week. On the positive side, repackager-of-the-obvious Malcolm Gladwell takes a gander at Everything Bad Is Good For You Steven Johnson's new tome that takes the philosophy Don't Worry, Be Happy to a whole new level. Johnson's thesis, via Gladwell: What is making us smarter is precisely what we thought was making us dumber: popular culture. Which is, of course, a completely Gladwellian concept. Now we feeling like frigging geniuses for having skimmed almost all of Blink. AB
Brain Candy [New Yorker]

'Twas the early 90s, and Raygun magazine's notorious "fuck if you can read this" art director David Carson famously declared "The End of Print". And we laughed ruefully, shook our heads with pity as we tried to decipher just who exactly "S o.uL AsyLUM" was, and returned to our copy of Spin to read about the Breeders' new LP.

Color us disappointed. The coverline is "Literary 'It' Couple Gets Hazed," but the only hazing of Nicole Kraus and Jonathan Safran Foer described in the piece are a few (rather tame) jokes from us.

Safe in the knowledge that few people would see it, buried as it was behind the annual "Summer Movies" section (a.k.a., "Jack Up the Ad Rates, Pinch Needs More Moose Money"), this Sunday's Arts & Leisure treated readers to a 3,750-word expose by Jesse Green on the shocking state of American theater; more specifically, the way high school plays have gotten bigger and more expensive. You read that right: 3,750 words on how the kids too geeky to make the yearbook staff are now doing Sondheim in better-fitting costumes. Mel Gussow must be rolling over in his grave. Next week in The Times, expect a 5,000-worder from Jennifer Dunning on how little Emily's dance recital now includes real-live swans. AB
The Supersizing of the School Play [NYTimes]

Now that Tina is officially leaving us for greener pastures, each remaining episode of Topic A is an event, a journey into poignancy. Especially when Christopher Hitchens wears brown loafers and white socks! Henry the Intern's heartfelt review (only three more to go, sniff) after the jump.

· The New York Post is sticking with its online registration plans, a spokeswoman tell one charming and handsome reporter. [E&P]

· Pre-Columbian Timesman Tom Friedman travels the country meeting grandmothers who get their news from Jon Stewart. Our grandmother wouldn't be able to get past him dropping "Liebowitz" as his last name. [NYT]

· Maybe you've heard: Arianna Huffington is launching a group blog. The Huffington Post debuts Monday [Newsweek.com]

· Casual encounters, plus the latest Iraq news: Craigslist founder Craig Newmark wants to add journalism. [AP via E&P]

· The Birth of a Nation.com: Lovable lefties finally launch the new site. [TheNation.com]

· Radar doesn't do likewise. [RadarMagazine.com] —JO

A moment of silence, please, for Harold Evans, Henry the Intern, and the three diabetics watching CNBC on Sunday nights: Tina Brown, she of the bathroom that time forgot, has been "relinquished" of her duties and the last episode of Topic A will air on May 29.

There was a fire drill at Bauer mag HQ today, except it wasn't so much a drill. There was actually a fire. But it turned out wasn't in the building itself, and thank God for that. Because we don't know how we'd get through the week without In Touch Weekly. A Gawker spy files the full report: