· Canteen owner John McDonald claims that chef Rocco DiSpirito intentionally and falsely implied that Canteen was for sale and shutting down by talking about buying it on his reality show, The Restaurant.
· Hotelier Andre Balazs and Ford Models chairman Katie Ford hotelier Andre Balazs and Ford Models chairman Katie Ford are separating. [Page Six]
· In the new issue of Black Book magazine, legendary adman George Lois "apologizes for his part in the decline of Western civilization - creating the 'I want my MTV' campaign. [Ed. disclosureI write for Black Book.] [Page Six]
· More chef Rocco DiSpirito gossip: gossip columist Cindy Adams says he claims she drove his celebrity customers away. (But she likes the food.) [Cindy Adams]
· In actor/director Woody Allen's new movie "Anything Else," he falls for 23-year-old actress Christina Ricci. [NY Daily News]

The AP (that hub of cultural criticism) has discovered a new subspecies of B-Lister: the "Pre-Achievement Celebrity," or "PAC-er""people who have done nothing or next to nothing, are being catapulted into the upper echelons of the noteworthy, gracing magazine covers, winning jobs on television, being interviewed. Interviewed about what? About their preparations for achievement, their plans for achievement, what life will be like after achievement. Which may not be much different than what it's like pre-achievement, since they're already basking under the sunlamp of fame." Between the celebutantes, the reality show contestants, and Brooklyn "designers" of all shapes, sizes, and products, this would probably describe half the celebrities in New York.
Fame doesn't wait for achievement on TV [AP/iWon! News]

Lasagnafarm interviews a disillusioned member of the [online-dating-with-plausible-denial] website Friendster:
Q: ...So how is a stranger six times removed from you in your Friendster network different from some skell you'd meet at a bar in Brooklyn?
A. You just pulled the nail from my head. There is no difference and that's one of these reasons I became disillusioned with the concept. But really, walking up to strangers on the street and awkwardly introducing yourself is the new Friendster. Haven't you heard?
An interview with a young Manhattanite who resigned his Friendster membership for reasons only known to him [Lasagnafarm]

· Salon on the mob project
· IHateNYC.com
· An update to the infamous A-LIST [Kiss the next four hours goodbye.]

LES blogger Lockhart Steele reports that the name of Keith McNally's new German-Jewish restaurant on Norfolk and Rivington will be "Prague." (Czech-Jewish?) "Prague" would have been a bit more marketable in the early 90s, but I suppose it still has more brand value than, say, "Dresden" or "Dusseldorf."
Paging Arthur Phillips [LockhartSteele]

The Unbelievable (a local cable access show) and hunger charity New York City Harvest are co-sponsoring the "World's Largest Picnic" to be held in Bryant Park at 2 PM on Sunday, August 3rd. (At least two people won't be there.) The world record is 1059 people.
The mother of all picnics! [The Unbelievable]

Karen O, from "New York band" the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, explains why she moved to Jersey*: "We live really close to the border of New York State. So, it's really kind of woodsy where we are and there's lots of farm activity and we're kind of isolated out here. And it's such a step up in the quality of life compared to living in New York for five years, where everything is ridiculously expensive for the total shittiness of the squalor you have to live in. I found myself toward the end, when I was living in Brooklyn, not really even going out much anymore. Such an expensive pastime, going out in New York. You just spend so much money in general just living there. I just ended up hanging out where I live anyway. We figured if we're not utilizing all the resources of New York City we might as well move somewhere a lot nicer** that's close by."
* Yes, Jersey.
** I guess "nicer" is relative.
Believe the hype: YYYs [Prefix mag]

Neal Pollack jumps in the middle of the Underground Literary Alliance/Believer magazine feud reported yesterday in Page Six: "When it comes to the world-bending dispute between The Believer Magazine and The Underground Literary Alliance, I fall somewhere in the middle...I believe that literature should be a peaceful art practiced by innocent people, thereby making it immune from criticism and media "snarkiness," particularly if the books were written by friends of mine, or friends of friends... I'm a bit conflicted, especially since The Believer has asked me to guest-edit its next issue. I already have a lot of great pieces lined up. Laurie Anderson is going to interview Phillip Glass about Frank Gehry. I'm going to write 10,500 words on the work on Wadislaw Pryzbilla, a Polish poet who died in 1375 but was recently reanimated only to have his work ignored by everyone but me. There will also be an article, written by a young intern who was recently released from prison in Serbia, about how to make a paper boat out of tinfoil. Then there's a very long appreciation of Elvis Costello by Jonathan Lethem, an even longer appreciation of Jonathan Lethem by Elvis Costello, and a poem by a black guy. It should be classic."
To the Finland Station [Neal Pollack]

A reader writes that on yesterday's The View, Candace Bushnell claimed to have invented the term metrosexual. The reader reports that "the term has been around since at least 1994 when Mark Simpson used the term in the British press. (I think it was the Guardian)" and that "perhaps Candace is just laying the ground work for her next HBO series (metrosexuals in the city?)...it struck me as a bit of shocking etymological land-grab...." Here's another one for the "fun with comments" section. What is Candace Bushnell's next HBO series? What does the post-Sex-in-the-City "Sex in the City" look like? And most importantly, why doesn't anyone ever make fun of Candace Bushnell? (Aside from that one little barb by NYT book reviewer Michiko Kakutani, of all people.) Why?

· Tonight I saw Moby (with silent blonde girlfriend in tow) at the Clinton Library event down at Capitale . . . complete mob scene but we got to watch while the fabulous looking (no more Big Macs!) Clinton had his photo taken with everyone there, including the Moby-ster who looked thrilled.
· I was eating lunch at the Conde Nast cafeteria when who should walk in but Anna Wintour. I was staring off into space when she walked into my line of vision. As soon as I noticed it was her and told my lunch companion he said jokingly, "Don't look into her eyes." This cracked me up because I thought he meant I'd turn to stone or something. Actually, he says
they've all been told not to stare at her.

· Veteran journalist Carl Bernstein on the Murdoch media empire: "The "grotesque values of Murdoch culture," including the "ideological bias" and "frequent journalistic dishonesty" of The Post and Fox News, are a "greater threat to the truth than the lying and secrecy of a succession of American Presidents or governments." [NY Daily News]
· The Believer magazine is feuding with the Underground Literary Alliance. [NY Post]
· A new reality show contests is in the works: the search for a gay country music superstar. [Page Six]
· Jerry Lewis says Marilyn Monroe wasn't involved with the Kennedys because she was involved with him. [Page Six]

Links:
· Councilman is shot to death in city hall [NYT]
· NYC councilman, gunman killed at city hall [WaPo]
· Murder at city hall [NY Post]
· The chamber of horrors [NY Daily News]
· NY councilor, gunman killed at city hall [Newsday]

The Black Table interviews Everyone's Burning author and Page Six columnist Ian Spiegelman, who explains the real value of his book: "Since publication I've also been informed that the glossy cover is perfect for cutting lines on, provided you use a credit card and not a razor. Did I intend that? No. But people can do whatever they want with it once they buy it. I need cash like anyone else." But he adds, "When I'm on coke, the last thing on earth I think about is anything below the waist. All these fuckers write about all the girls they're bedding while on these Herculean drug benders. I don't buy it. Give me coke and you can put Paris on my face and Nicki on my crotch with the Ronson twins in between and I'll still be blathering away about the end of the world. Which is a fine reason not to do coke."
Between a rock and a hard place: Page Six's Ian Spiegelman [Black Table]

Tina Brown, prompted by conversations with former ImClone CEO Sam Waskal and ex-Sotheby's chief Al Taubman is telling prison jokes in her column: "On day one of his sentence, [Taubman] told me, an inmate approached him. 'He said: 'Don't worry, it s not that bad. Do you play golf?' 'I said: 'Yeah, I play golf.' 'You'll love Mondays then. Tennis?' 'Yeah, tennis is good.' 'Well, all we do on Tuesdays is play tennis. You like smoking cigars and playing billiards?' 'Sounds great.' 'Wednesdays will be good. You gay?' 'No.' 'You'll hate Thursdays then.'" She also mentions, if you're taking notes, that ex-cons (white collar, of course) are the party-guest-du-jour in the Hamptons right now.
The tabloid cliche of millionaire cons living it up at a club fed 'open prison' is way off [Times2]

· Places where you can still smoke
· P. Diddy wants to buy the Knicks [via Fark]
· Jewelry repair shops in Manhattan
· Vaguely Disturbing Hipster Accoutrement of the Day: the Heatherette Hello Kitty Tee (I fully expect to see these at Piano's in the next week or so.) [via theModernAge]

Reader-submitted variations of "metrosexual":
· "Metroesxual is a fine word, though I recently heard a better one: neverosexual. Here's the definition: nev er o sex u al n. a person who never has sex, generally in spite of his or her best efforts; adj. Of or relating to a person who just can't get laid. Usage: People used to think he was gay. But in reality he's just neverosexual."
· "Re: the debate on whether or not metrosexuals are just closeted queens: Yes - there is such a thing as a metrosexual as defined by the Times and others (straight guy with Barney's tastes). But - there is a significant subculture of closeted queens in this city who tell people they are metrosexual but are really just big 'mos. These would be hometrosexuals. Usage: Billy claims that it's not mutually exclusive to wear Seven jeans and be jonesing for Chloe, but we all know that he's just a big hometrosexual and that he's really got his eye on Doug."
[Ed.If any of you would like to discuss or add more, note the "Comments" box below.]

Blogger "Dong Resin" argues that "metrosexual" connotes something other than its most frequently used definition ("the current crop of fashionable, foppish, dandyish and yet somehow sexually straight men. Guys with frosted hair and $100 tee shirts. Guys who loofah.") "'Metrosexual' is a clever term, but it's kind of a lingual dodge. You don't know right off the bat what's going on, because being a metrosexual is not a sexual behavior at all.
What you should do is call these boys what they are : fags. A true 'metrosexual' would want to fuck an entire city, a condition for which we already have a convenient term : 'Bloomberg'. I've mentioned in the past how I don't equate homosexuality with faggy behavior, due to my own firsthand experience with gay men, who for the most part seem essentially the same as straight guys, until they start with the rim jobs. Homosexuality is not a personality trait any more than being a blonde is a personality trait. Bad example. Any more than being green eyed, say."
Queer nation [Dong Resin's Joint]

· New York Mag and the Guardian are sponsoring a "Media at War" conference tomorrow to discuss media coverage of Gulf War II. The Post reports that unlike "most participants" who are "anti-war and anti-Bush," their reporter will "stand up for our military and for the reporters who chronicled their heroics." [In case you temporarily forgot that the Post was a Murdoch publication...] [Page Six]
· The disclaimer on REHAB's invite for their "Elevator Music" party after the club was padlocked for violation of cabaret laws (clubgoers were dancing): "At the advisement of our attorney, we respectfully request that any epileptics, spastics or others prone to seizures or outbursts of exuberance refrain from attempting to receive rehabilitation at our clinic. Additionally we regret to inform our loyal patrons suffering from Tourette's Syndrome that they will no longer be admitted due to the fact that their uncontrollable motor tics, such as head jerking, neck stretching, foot stamping, and body twisting . . . might be construed as rhythmic dancing." [Page Six]
· Caviarteria owner commits suicide [Page Six]
· Liz Smith is enthralled with the new reality series, "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" despite the fact that several of her friends don't like it: "I want the Fab Five to come and give my life a makeover even if I am not a guy." [Liz Smith]
· Actor Harvey Keitel is forced to reveal his assets in Manhattan family court. [NY Daily News]

· Felix Rohatyn, Jay-Z, at the Four Seasons, but sadly, not together: Yesterday afternoon at about 2:00 I saw Felix Rohatyn leaving the Grill Room at the Four Seasons as I was coming in. Shortly thereafter Jay-Z walked through the Grill Room on his way into the Pool Room, but disappointingly, did not return. Is it a sighting worth mentioning if you see someone where they work? Julian Niccolini, the co-owner, asked me if my (large) traveling bag was full of money, but apparently my answer wasn't amusing enough (didn't really hear him at first because I didn't think he was addressing me, then a mumbled "Oh, that it were") because he immediately busied himself straightening bar stools. Other gossip gleaned from Grill Room bartenders: all art in the private rooms has been sold to service the Vivendi debt, and they'll be very sorry to see the Picasso tapestry go, but they hate the Rosenquist in the Pool Room, so that can't be sold soon enough. Also, Geraldo will be having his annualXXXXX next wedding reception there on a Sunday in the near future.
· Interpol - Spotted the WHOLE friggin band at the Hyatt West Hollywood in Los Angeles on Monday afternoon. Roadie mentioned to Paul that he was in Gawker (!) Paul managed a disaffected giggle of some sort and went right back to looking indifferent. I made sure to ask for a room far away from the band and the desk clerk snarked, 'Don't worry, we keep those types segregated."

Disgruntled insiders on Rocco di Spirito's new reality show "The Restaurant" dish about what really happened. One line cook writes:
"To set a few things straight:
1. There is not a more shameless breed than the waitstaff hired at this place. 'Oh!! The camera!! Me Me Me Me!!!! Guests are here? Whatever..'
2. Rocco Dispirito never once picked up a pan in the kitchen. Not one time. Not once. Opening night with the fire, NBC made sure he was filmed running around with the fire extinguisher. The man never cooked a goddamned thing.
3. The food blows. Tony walks around mashing plated dishes with a Peltex saying, 'This is not a French restaurant'. And the best cooks left because nobody was getting paid and the food sucked. Lots of Drama though, and like NBC told us..'The only real people are in the kitchen'. No shit."
The restaurant reality show [eGullet via TMN]