Sure, semi-spurious libel suits against publishers aren't usually anything to celebrate, but this one is special. Special K, that is. We're delighted to report that Alex Kuczynski has been named as a co-defendant in a lawsuit being brought against her publisher, Doubleday! The plaintiff is a plastic surgeon who claims that Special K. maligned him in Beauty Junkies, her recent non-bestseller. Dr. Arnold W. Klein, who specializes in 'injectables,' is demanding $10 million in damages, claiming that Doubleday knew that the book's claims of his negligence, incompetence, and his conflict of interest with a pharmaceutical company were false. He also — and this is the really sad part — says that the book libels him by reporting that he "lost control of his bladder" when faced with a troubling allegation in another case. His rebuttal? "Klein did not lose control of his bladder for any reason remotely connected to the case or his concern about the supposed 'coup,' referred to above," the complaint states. So why did he pee himself? Rest assured, we're looking into it.

Plastic surgery disaster Alex Kuczynski appeared on "The Colbert Report" last evening: here's the clip. It's amusing (or at least Colbert's end is) and nothing more, but a few things you may want to note:

• Soon, the Daily News will be all Widdicombe, all the time. Anyone know what ever happened to that Grove guy?
  

Christmas, New Years, whatever — today marks a much more important holiday: the return of the highlight of our week, the Times' Critical Shopper column. And Beauty Junkie Alex Kuczynski is back from her vacation in fine form, regaling us with tales of a sherry-soaked, churro-glutted undergraduate sojourn in Spain, and explaining to us that though featured shop T Casan's owners say that its name "comes from the Gaelic phrase for 'a woman's path,'" she refuses to accept that meaning because "that sounds like a self-help book for women going through menopause, so I prefer the Spanish translation. If you don't count the accent on the first word, it translates as "they marry you," and frankly I felt married to at least two pairs of the shoes by the time I left." Oh, Kucz, never leave us again!

As 2006 huffs toward its inexorable end, we decided to take a moment to recognize those personalities that made our job that much more tolerable this year. These are the people who gave us endless fodder for our douchebag mill, who were attracted to the spotlight like moths to a flame, whose stated disdain for our coverage of them was contradicted by their almost pathetic attempts to court it. The adage that there's no such thing as bad publicity has never felt more apt.

Remember when we posted that YouTube clip of Beauty Junkie Alex Kucz lambasting 740 Park author Michael Gross via voicemail? And remember when, after the clip, we mentioned that "This obviously has nothing whatsoever to do with Monday's Kucz Fresh Air interview, by the way"? Well, David Patrick Columbia wants to lift the scales from your eyes, America: that "voicemail message" is actually a clip from the Fresh Air interview, taken out of context and spliced together with Gross's voicemail via the magic of technology! Let's let Columbia explain it a little more thoroughly:

Alex Kucz sure has been trying to be a little bit more of a woman of the people lately. First H&M, and now, Uniqlo, the new Japanese bargain cashmere emporium on lower Broadway with Kelis and Kim Gordon in its advertisements. Alex is hip, yo. Clock the nose piercing. And just to prove that she's really not so different from you, me, or the help, she's also incredibly courteous to those whose fate it is to serve. Why, just listen to this instance of her compassion!

When Alex Kuczynski had a book-signing in Austin a few weeks ago, she couldn't help but report snidely that one of her co-authors looked like Ann-Margret circa Carnal Knowledge, and her book Beauty Junkies had to be edited after galleys had gone out because several people she mentioned by name in the book were none too pleased at her portrayal of them. Along those same lines, a tipster reports (all the way from Canada!):

We were perusing this month's Field & Stream (Shut up - like articles on the ten best ways to hunt deer during winter don't get you hot.) when we came across the following entry in that mag's "Heroes & Villains" section. By our count, this makes Field & Stream the final North American publication to have taken a shot at Kuczynski, following closely on the heels of Black Enterprise magazine's recent feature, "Thank God This Bitch Is White." We're not necessarily unsympathetic to Special K's point of view here, but we do love the picture chosen to go alongside the text: We're sure whoever's life force she was just about to ingest died slowly and painfully.

Noted Amazon sockpuppet Alex K's Critical Shopper column contains a revelation: Alex isn't too classy to shop at H&M! Okay, she is. But she can stomach it for a little while if she wears earplugs. So she pops them in and prepares to brave the commoners and the distasteful smell of souvlaki. After all, she has a very important purchase in her sights:

Alex "Special" K. has taken down the "Walter Winchell 'Ax'" profile and sockpuppety Amazon reviews that we posted about this morning, like anyone with half a brain would've. However, it does seem to be the case that she's operating with only half. A fervently good review of Beauty Junkies and a scathing swipe at 740 Park are still on the site as of this writing — and the name on this profile, while it isn't Alex's own, is that of her husband, Charles Stevenson. Smooth one, Alex! You almost tricked us this time! But wait, that's not even the best part. The title of the mean review of 740 Park? " Over-hyped by the author's friends..." Screengrabs after the jump.

A tipster informs us that our favorite recovering Beauty Junkie might be harboring another dangerous addiction — an addiction to fluffing up her own Amazon reader reviews. The clue? An Amazon review of Michael Gross's 740 Park — which is, of course, a tell-all about the building where Alex lives, including some unsavory deets about her now-husband, Charles Stevenson — written by a reviewer using the same nom de Amazon. The alias in question is "Walter Winchell 'Ax' (New York)," which is kinda funny in and of itself. After the jump, "Walter's" reviews are on display for your perusal.

Update: Uhhh, we guess it's not sockpuppetry if you admit that it's you in your profile. Then it's just stupidity.

There's something scarily loose cannon-ish about our favorite plastic surgery patient Alex Kuczynski. In Austin, Texas recently for a reading and signing of Beauty Junkies, she found herself seated in the author's tent next to an "Ann-Margret look-alike (circa "Carnal Knowledge") in a low-cut top," who had written a book about "how for an entire year she said yes to every man or woman who asked her on a date, including a homeless guy and a 70-year-old salsa dancer." Later, Kuczynski refers to her as a "hussy," then leaves to buy cowboy boots without signing anything.

We know your time is precious, so we've pared every bloated feature in today's Thursgay Styles down to one digestible sentence and one representative quote, via a procedure we like to call textual lipo. Trust us, it's all the rage in Europe.

Just when you thought 'reformed' beauty junkie Alex Kuczynski was through dishing out highly suspect nuggets of wisdom, she gives a little bit more. Enjoy these choice quotes from her interview with DC rag Express, and count yourself lucky that you've never been a guest in her home.

Life isn't so bad for New York Times Style writer Alex Kuczynski these days, what with the release of her book, Beauty Junkies, going cold turkey on the needle and all. What more is there for her to accomplish? Why, to win the Council Of Literary Magazines & Presses Spelling Bee, of course.

We like a poke a little good-natured fun at Times shopping columnist Alex Kuczynski every now and again, but we do appreciate the difficulties her job must entail. Take her recent trip to Lord & Taylor:

And we are here to bring you her every word. If you can't want to hear about reshaping the privates and the lip-plumping-gone wrong that finally convinced her to cold turkey, this clip from WNBC this morning is for you.

A few readers pointed us in the direction of the October 22 entry of the New York Times Book Review podcast featuring Alex Kuczynski (mp3).