· Over 7,000 people have registered in advance for the Unity convention, the "minority" journalist convention. Well, that's 7000 people Conde Nast's HR can put on the "do not hire" list. [WaPo]
· For the first time in history, circulation for the New Yorker has topped 1 million, though editor Remnick admits "It sure as hell isn't our acute coverage of the Paris Hilton situation." Yeah, seriously. Their Hilton coverage sucks. Somewhere, hopefully somewhere tasteful, former New Yorker editrix Tina Brown is seriously drinking. [NYP (2nd item)]
· Fallout continues over big media mogul Ted Turner publishing his lengthy diatribe in the The Washington Monthly railing against big media. Turner also tells Charlie Rose that the Wall Street Journal and New York Times rejected the piece before the Monthly picked it up. Stupid big media. Heh. [NYP]

You know, we even surprise ourselves when we're right: Richard Goldstein, who has worked at the Village Voice since before most of us were born, was laid off this week. Says the Voice's PR department:

We're still in rumor territory here, mind you — but the rumor is that Richard Goldstein, the Village Voice editor since something like 1974, has in one way or another severed his relationship with the Voice. Well, we heard they canned him as part of some nefarious scheme, but Goldstein didn't reply to our request for comment and the Voice press office isn't picking up the phone, so what we actually know could be described as "nothing."

Today, The Telegraph runs with the big scoop that Vanity Fair editor-in-gifts Graydon Carter is finally planning to marry his British girlfriend, former Gosford Park manor-heiress Anna Scott.

· Page Six prints a sighting of former NBC exec Brandon Tartikoff eating dinner in Los Angeles. Still, because Tartikoff died in 1997, they have to issue a correction today. [Page Six]
· Consider this your warning of the forthcoming apocalypse: defunct and unknown American Magazine will soon reincarnate as Chicken Soup for the American Soul. Barf. [NYP]
· Howard Fineman, political journalist of little or no import, tells talk radio DJ Don Imus, "One reason why Chris Matthews' Sunday show is so successful is that the producer there tells Chris, 'Shut up!'" Naturally, Fineman sticks his tale between his legs and apologizes online a few hours later. [NYDN (2nd item)]
· TV Guide plans celeb mag. Not at all a crowded marketplace, no sir. [WWD]
· Boston newspapers, bored to death in the wake of the DNC mass exodus, begin to pick at each others' scabs. [New Yorker, Anonymous Outsider]
· Heads are rolling at the newly-consolidated Random House/Ballantine, but Seabiscuit writer Laura Hillenbrand is still getting paid. Does this seem unfair or is it just us? [NYP]

At left, Pamela Anderson finally completes her transformation into a life-size blow-up doll.

· Vanity Fair gets paranoid on gifts; staffers must get any freebies worth more than $20 approved by their managing editor. Without Harry and David gift baskets — and R. J. Reynolds crates — to sustain him, will editor Graydon Carter dessicate? [Elisa L-K (bottom items)]
· The battle of the boy magazines, round 36: stalwart Men's Health has more advertisers than Maxim has coked-up starlets. [NYP]
· Desperate? Or just kind of sad? Sports Illustrated's swimsuit issue gets a six-episode reincarnation as an NBC reality show, but we're sure the paper version will be just as popular as ever in the bathroom. [NYT]
· New York City publishes 40+ daily newspapers. Can you name 10 of them? [Gotham Gazette]
· Hey! I have an idea! Why doesn't Barry Diller buy Slate and give it to me! The real question: will Microsoft also unload its stake in MSNBC? And where would the fun be in owning that? [NYP]

Our Intern Neel Shah files a final report from Boston as the post-Convention exodus begins. We imagine Boston to be a sort of Mad Max landscape of human waste, torn clothing, and the occasional limb. You know: just like it was before the Convention hit town.

The August issue of Details takes a look at the post-Fleiss era in Hollywood's prostitution game. The new hookers are hotter, nastier, much more expensive, internet-savvy (why would your agent risk getting popped by a vice cop on Sunset) and the johns largely drug-free. Less surprising: Many type-A power-players like to get beaten up and pissed on (sometimes at parties, in front of their friends), hire hookers to do things that make your typical credit-climbing mactress blush, and industry types sometimes sneak in a whirl with a call-girl during business hours. Whatever. If William Morris or CAA didn't want people fucking on the job, they'd lock the doors to the janitorial closets and take away everyone's expense accounts. We predict a backlash-fueled return to the sepia-toned days of crispy-haired pros, salad bowls full of blow, and guys who can't stop talking about their Ferraris long enough to get hard.

Today, freelance writer Kristen Kemp dissed an editor named 'Martha' in a Mediabistro tell-all. The best part is that there's ten sides to every story (particularly today, for some reason). After the jump: two views on 'Martha' the former Cosmo editor — and some backlash directed at Kristen.

We've been wanting to do a story about how exhausted all the editors at New York mag are, about how editor Adam Moss is working them all into the ground in preparation for the upcoming relaunch of the mag, that sorta thing. But, get this — no one wants to talk!

According to a story on Mediabistro today, there are evil editors working in our magazines, scheming only to sabotage and destroy writers. Right — because we all know the problem isn't the drunk writers who turn in random amounts of dubious words whenever they feel like it, yeah... it's the editors! (Actually, it's the money-grubbing publishers! But we'll get to that later.) Freelancer Kristen Kemp spills the dirt on the hateration she got from an anonymous former Cosmo editor named "Martha"— but cops to her own cock-ups:

Well, I guess it's just a damn good thing Kristi Yamaguchi and Michelle Kwan aren't in the news any more.
Connie Cho's Educational Prison Jaunt [Page Six]

It didn't even occur to us that talk show chat-ette Tina Brown had been freed from her CNBC pinfold and sent to Boston; had we known, we would have certainly followed her there with our night-vision goggles and digicam. Alas, we missed the boat on this one and can only report that she hosted a party thrown in her honor (can you do that, by the way? Host your own honoring? What would Emily Post say?) that, according to the Boston Globe, "proved to be one of the most popular gatherings of the week." [UPDATE: Oh, it's Boston English! The dinner, not that you can tell from the antecdents involved, is in honor of Hillary. Hillary who?] The usual suspects were in attendance: Michael Moore, Gray Davis and, of course, Kevin Bacon. Because there ain't no party like a Tina party, because a Tina party's got Kevin Bacon!
A Power Lunch; A Sisters' Brunch [Boston Globe]

The Village Voice is a big mangy dog — and it's shedding season! Media critic Cynthia Cotts, who's been on hiatus for unknown reasons for well over a month, is not going to be coming back, we hear. Already her official email has been disabled. In the world of media crit, Cynthia was the fairest and most interesting in the biz — it totally made us sick. (Please note: we don't know the circumstances of her departure.)

A Boston.com reader snaps this pic of troublemaking writer/American hero Robert Smigel and Triumph the Insult Comic Dog (with cigar, at left) getting bounced from the DNC. Of course, this just may have been a stunt for his documentary, but we prefer to think that they ejected Triumph for asking Teresa Heinz Kerry what it's like to get doggystyled by the hound-faced Senator from Massachusetts.

Ben Affleck isn't the only puppet wandering the DNC. Variety reports that genius comedy writer Robert Smigel is running around with his hand jammed up the rubber ass of Triumph the Insult Comic Dog, harassing the delegates for a documentary of his own and snagging interviews with the likes of Michael Moore and Arianna Huffington. Someone should probably check Affleck's anal column for a controlling forearm; he's been so maniacally on-message that we wouldn't be surprised if someone from the Kerry team is working him like a cheap sock.

· Cartoonist Tom Tomorrow is pissed that Matt Drudge stole his photo of Michael Moore and Bill O'Reilly. [This Modern World]
· Novelist Jane Smiley 0wnz the New York Times letters page. [Slate]
· Martha Stewart Omnimedia gets a new chairman, as Jeffrey W. Udden steps down and is replaced by Thomas C. Siekman. Siekman has those oh-so-necessary legal skills that MSO could use right now, but can he bake an obscure yet delicious pie? [NYT]
· Spanking-new Newsday publisher, Timothy Knight, offers lower ad rates and circulation minimums in an attempt to placate advertisers, most of whom are still a bit peeved about former publisher Ray Janson's inflated sense of ego circulation. [NYDN]
· Self magazine will open a temporary spa for their 25th anniversary, aptly called the Self Center, on Morton Street in September. For a mere $25, you can access all the spa's services. Frankly, we don't trust any treatment that costs under $120. Exclusivity, people! [NYP]

Our Democratic Convention Correspondent Neel Shah pokes his head up between Boston's finest bong hits and late-night hotel room make-out parties to file a report. Farnsworth Bentley! John Cusack! Benjamin McKenzie! So many people we don't care about at all!

Ben Affleck is everywhere at the DNC. Not since Barbarella decided that Vietnam wasn't so groovy has an actor gathered so much attention in the arena of "show business for ugly people." The media's got all of bases covered: