A 12-year-old tripped at a museum in Taiwan this weekend; luckily a $1.5 million painting was there to break his fall. The kid is reportedly fine, the $1.5 million painting, not so much: according to reports, it now has a kid-sized hole in it.

Not only is law school more unpopular than it’s been in more than a generation—those contrarian youngsters who do go to law school now suck more than ever.

“Millennials,” a demographic group defined by a slavish devotion to “keeping it real” by purchasing the correct consumer products, are now old enough to be “out there” in the world, “doing their thing.” Instead, they are living at home.

Tal Fortgang, the white Princeton student who experienced the briefest flutter of virality last year after he wrote a bold essay refusing to “check his privilege,” is back with a new thing about, let’s see, “Left-wing privilege,” which exists, Tal Fortgang says at great length.

Mustard-colored mustard merchant McDonald’s cares about kids, to the extent that kids can whine enough to convince their parents to take them to McDonald’s. McDonald’s: heroic, or most heroic?

“In 2015, 36 percent of parents said in a poll published this week that they expect to support their child for more than two years after graduation... [but] most millennials are reluctant to admit they’re being bankrolled.” Psht. Get that free money while you still can, idiots.

The angst-ridden "fixie" messengers of the "millennial" generation are now the most important consumer demographic out there. So what's their financial plan? Oh, millennials will tell you their financial plan, dad.

You know who just bought a house? A new house? Ayden, and Kylie, and tens of thousands of their "millennial" generation friends. Did you also buy a house? Or no?

Can we please find a 29-year-old to reveal the 29 Things They've Learned in 29 Years?

The dreaded "millennial" generation, composed of millions of identical young people who are on drugs, are now old enough to get "real" jobs and have their own bank accounts. They're still getting the hang of it, god bless em.

Traditionally, young people come to the big city with a dream; then, when that dream inevitably fails to materialize, many of them move away to some smaller, more forgiving town and cry silently, years later, at what might have been. Now, the fucking tables have turned.

The man suspected of murdering his hedge fund manager father over an allowance cut is also the prime suspect in a suspicious fire at a romantic rival's Hamptons home, police say.

A five-year-old boy who heard that the University of Alabama-Birmingham was canceling its football program sent his entire $1 allowance to the school to try to save it. That's not nearly enough—his useless gesture was a failure.

One year ago, a New York City college student named Rachael Sacks wrote a typically obnoxious Thought Catalog essay that "went viral" for approximately one week. Now, she is reminiscing on the pains of her lost fame.

The homeless in America are not just old winos perched on the same corner day after day. There are also the young homeless, who ride the rails and sleep on the beach and live equally awful but more mobile lives. Some towns would like to make their lives harder.

A high school student who got an F in chemistry after she was accused of cheating on a test is suing the school district in an effort to reverse the punishment.

Burning up the local New York City press today: this video of a "mob" of teen hooligans vandalizing a Jewish-owned deli in Crown Heights, Brooklyn this weekend. Has the race war begun (again)???

Yet another study has confirmed that sexting teens are more likely to have real sex, but researchers say they still have not solved the "chicken and egg problem" of which one causes the other. More research to be done. Lots more.

Although to you the idea of buying a home may seem like a fuzzy, faraway dream, the numbers show that thousands of young people just like you are in fact doing just that. What is their secret?

Talking to children about god exposes some serious flaws in credibility: "He could just make the earth collapse," says one child; "When he gets happy, he brings out the sun," says another. These kids are all over the fucking map.