A job-seeking Time Warner mole today passes along the listing for our dream job:

We pulled bank on hiring once, too. Then we came to work here instead, and, sadly, no longer pull bank.

A reader points out a possible weakness in Amanda Scheer Demme's defenses at the Trop: the service entrance. Why, that's just crazy enough to work! From Craigslist:

Defamer is committed to helping its readers find exciting opportunities in the celebrity pet-pampering field. We realize that this ad is almost certainly the product of an anonymous Craigslist jokester, but if nothing else, it's a fitting reminder that we're all just one wipe of a spoiled shit-tzu's ass from that coveted and elusive three-picture deal:

With its hottness quotient rising from "scorching" to "avert your D-list eyeballs before your corneas are instantly liquefied," it looks like the Roosevelt Hotel has turned to Craigslist to find reinforcements for its Tropicana Bar Entry Prevention Team:

With dreams jobs like this one available to any attractive go-getter with a drive to succeed and the hands of a Swedish-trained angel, we don't know why anyone would waste their time pursuing Tinseltown dreams that don't involve kneading out the knots (does an erect penis count as a knot?) in a stressed executive's muscles:

Tired of twiddling your thumbs and desperately wondering, How can I get my foot in the door at Condé Nast when I'm only a slightly attractive individual with average body fat? Well, young grasshoppers, it's easier than you think. One need simply spend several thousands of dollars to pursue a degree in journalism, and then fine glossies like Condé Nast Traveler will come knocking at your door with exotic, unpaid internship offers. From there, it's just a mere 6 or 7 years of indentured servitude until you're breaking the glass ceiling from your corner cubicle. And you thought j-school was a waste!

• Contrary to whatever you may read in the forthcoming 65-pound fall issue of Vogue, tapered pants are not hot this fall, especially when worn with an ankle bracelet. [A Socialite's Life]
• Classy perv outlet Nerve is looking for an editor. Benefits include lots of greasy-but-intellectual dildos. [Mediabistro]
• When the MTA does away with subway booth attendants, who loses? Why, the little old lady who doesn't know how to work the machine, that's who. [RedNova]
• At the risk of being prosecuted for insider trading, here's a hot tip: If you see a bum shitting on the IBM building, sell now. [Craigslist]
• Like it or not, Katie Couric may someday leave the Today show. Yes — it's true! [AHN]

We'd normally feel a little pathetic, doing a second Craiglist post in one day. But patheticness is relative, and these folks win.

An ad showed up on Craiglist yesterday that promises to make one of our dreams come true. (And, interestingly, said ad was not in the "casual encounters" section.)

We'd normally just tack this on as an update, but we feel the following clarification merits its own post (before too many more of you email us). Earlier, we posted an email from Eric Alterman in which he announced his need for a new assistant. Among Alterman's prerequisites for employment: