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• Contrary to whatever you may read in the forthcoming 65-pound fall issue of Vogue, tapered pants are not hot this fall, especially when worn with an ankle bracelet. [A Socialite's Life]
• Classy perv outlet Nerve is looking for an editor. Benefits include lots of greasy-but-intellectual dildos. [Mediabistro]
• When the MTA does away with subway booth attendants, who loses? Why, the little old lady who doesn't know how to work the machine, that's who. [RedNova]
• At the risk of being prosecuted for insider trading, here's a hot tip: If you see a bum shitting on the IBM building, sell now. [Craigslist]
• Like it or not, Katie Couric may someday leave the Today show. Yes — it's true! [AHN]