Cameron Douglas has been sentenced to five years in prison for dealing meth. Last night his father sent a letter asking the judge for leniency. Looks like he got it: The mandatory advisory sentence for the charge is ten years.

Alcoholics! Sexy sexing! Cancer rodents! Cancer guidos! And fat people who can't remember your name! It's health watch, where we watch your health—with a poor bedside manner!

Californians keep coming up with ridiculous schemes to attract tourists. Dennis Peron, a "hero to the marijuana movement," is trying to open a weed-friendly hotel, or "pot-tel" in Koreatown's famed Hotel Normandie. Tonight is the grand opening.

Police are saying that a third-grader was caught giving out over 60 baggies of heroin, stamped with the words "trust me," to classmates. Come on—don't all kids go through a horse phase? [AP]

On last night's Jeopardy!, more than biographical tidbits were revealed when Alex Trebek asked a forensic scientist about his job. The guy works with illicit drugs mostly, and apparently, Alex has some experience in that area.

The folks on Red Eye are discussing the recent news that scientists are experimenting with prescribing hallucinogens for depression. It wouldn't be a truly informed debate without the perspective of at least one guy wearing a space alien costume.

Dead moms! Body piercing! Fat baby diets! Fat drug diets! And somebody poking all up in your teeth, for your own good! It's health watch, where we watch your health—while getting our shine on, simultaneously!

The whole hallucinogens-as-medicine thing is back! Scientist are conducting very strict scientific tests on psychedelic drugs as a treatment for depression. Allow us to save the doctors some trouble. We present our own research findings on this important topic below.

If buying dirt weed off a neo-hippie on Haight Street doesn't satisfy your hunger for an "authentic" San Francisco experience, next time try a guided tour of the Tenderloin. The area is now being promoted as a human zoo.

Need an example of why selling coke on Craigslist is a really bad idea? Just ask Brooklyn personal trainer Kinrod Priester, who was previously a 14-year guest of the New York State Department of Correctional Services. [NYP, image]

Do you think someone should be arrested for smoking pot? These celebs don't either. Watch as Bill Maher, Chris Rock, John Stewart and others discuss why the war on drugs is out of date.

Though she's clearly been hitting the substances and sexy nudie pics a little too hard lately, British socialite Peaches Geldof refuses to go to rehab. Even though her own mother died of an overdose, and her Dad's begging her to.

Never take acid before going on a flight, kids. This girl thought it would be a good idea to freak out in the most public space, the food court, and then repeatedly ask to call her parents.

Yesterday we learned that one of Donald Trump's "rich girl" employees had stiffed a poor quaalude dealer out of thousands of dollars. Today we learn that quaaludes are not just for the rich; teachers are all luded up, as well.

Cameron Douglas, Michael Douglas' wayward son, is due to be sentenced for dealing meth next week, and a host of well-wishers—including Catherine Zeta-Jones and Pat Riley—have written to his judge explaining just how hard his life has been.

We all know Donald Trump's been having a rough recession. But have things really gotten so bad that even his "rich girl" employees can't afford a few thousand dollars worth of 'ludes?

Police have shut down six businesses for allegedly selling weed through their back doors and even over the counter. Police Commissioner Raymond Kelly said of the Chris Restaurant in Crown Heights: "At lunch it turned into a veritable pot-luck event."

Afghanistan President Hamid Karzai fixed the recent presidential elections, and now he is blaming the UN for doing that. He is also threatening to join the Taliban and generally being kinda nutty. Diplomat Peter Galbraith says he is on drugs!

The Cornell Daily Sun spoke to a source at UCLA, "John," who deals weed on campus, about the upcoming November vote in California to legalize marijuana. As a stoner, he likes it. As a businessman, it's bad news.

Thalidomide and soda and Vitaminwater and Jesus H. Christ, the Christians are doing yoga. It's your daily health watch, where we watch your health—while sinning!