Greasy chicks and dudes compete for male affection tonight on The Bachelor and Bromance, respectively. We try to restrain ourselves, but can't help noting our disdain for the latter, regardless of tonight's Bro-athalon results.

Having journeyed through the dark abyss and emerged to become the current Biggest Star in the World Upstaged by a Mischievous Doggy, junketphobic Marley & Me star Owen Wilson will be counting many blessings in 2009.

After several months of negotiations, Universal has closed its deal to sell genre-mill Rogue Pictures to the studio's close financing partners at Relativity Media.

Sherri Shepherd's got an entry for Hollywood PrivacyWatch! On a plane over the holidays, she realized that the "short," fedora-clad man she'd been bothering was none other than the famously mercury-addled Jeremy Piven.

Regardless of your New Year's party indiscretions, the possibilities are still endless for 2009. Maybe cut back on the drinking, but whoever you made out with in that alley will change your life. We promise.

In a timely, sort of surprising portent of things to come this awards season, the National Society of Film Critics chose the Israeli animated documentary Waltz With Bashir as its best picture of 2008.

· David E. Kelley has chosen Charity Wakefield to star in Legally Mad. The Actresses-Who-Look-Like-Michelle Pfeiffer Guild is up in arms over the choice of a brunette candidate who looks nothing like Michelle Pfeiffer. [THR]

It appears that Ricky Gervais has taken Simon Pegg's weight-related criticism to heart, as the Oscars-eschewing star has begun slamming the overweight in the press, causing some controversy. And he's not taking it back!

Subscribers to Britney Spears's official Twitter feed (yep—Brit's Twitterin'!) have grown accustomed to updates like "I love Japan! I think all the tiny cars are so cute!"

1/2 — Dan Tana's. Friday night. CAMERON CROWE having dinner. That guy looks the same as he did when he [wrote] Fast Times. KEVIN CONNOLLY in the bar area alone, but looking like he was waiting for someone. And he was wearing a green Hanes-like short sleeved t-shirt. Seemed odd on such a chilly L.A. night. The End. [Hollywood PrivacyWatch is written by and for Defamer readers; send your sightings to tips@defamer.com.]

Reactions to Jett Travolta's death on Friday surged forth over the weekend, with paramedics, publicists, anti-Scientology advocates and the usual exploiters lending voices to the noise. We sort through it after the jump.

The Holidays™ are over. We hope yours ended on a lighter note than ours did—curling up with a 60 Minutes story about a seven-year-old girl decapitated in the back of a limo by a drunk driver.

Last night, VH1 finally aired the Charm School reunion show where Sharon Osbourne and contestant Megan Hauserman got into a fight so epic, it sent Hauserman to the hospital (and to the LAPD).

Defamer's Week in Review: Artie was enshrined, Tara rehabbed, shots were fired, 2008 ended, and much more — after the jump. Have a great weekend!

· The Oscar race may be all over the place, but at least the Razzies have a clear front runner this year. Still, a slickly packaged FYC spot never hurts. [via TotalFilm.com]

Thanks to the truncated holiday schedule, this special edition of Comments of the Week actually honors the last two weeks. But what a prize: a beloved blogspot with few tears or scratches! So, who won?

2009 started off like many others, with unimportant programming limping along until mid-season replacements, Super Bowl commercials, and the dreaded American Idol. Here's to 11 more days of an AI-free national discussion. Sláinte!

· Aaron Beaumont at Hotel Cafe, and George Clinton & Parliament-Funkadelic are at Club Nokia.

We'd say the new redband trailer for Crank 2 is NSFW, but let's face it: You're not at work today, and even if you were, it's Friday viewing the whole office can/should enjoy.

While today brought good news for crime-accused Hollywood celebrities, how did Hollywood-adjacent folk heroes like Benjamin Button shooter James Cialella fare?