The catfight between I Heart Huckabees director David O. Russell and NYT writer Sharon Waxman (some background here) might yet develop into the bloodletting cockfight that we'd secretly hoped for. Russell informed Waxman that he won't allow the use of photos of him and George Clooney in her upcoming book, Rebels on the Backlot, and when she ignored him, Russell had his lawyer reinforce the message. Waxman wasn't pleased:
Remember when the Motion Picture Academy started sending its members magical DVD players that would play enchanted, copy-protected screener copies of movies for Oscar consideration? It seems that the studios have balked at producing the DVDs because they haven't seen the machines or observed how they will work in Academy members' homes, so there might not be actual "movies" to "watch" for this upcoming awards season. The Academy maintains the players will eventually be adopted, as no one expects Academy members to accept the new technology right away. It's only a matter of time before word of mouth helps everyone realize that the players' installation process, in which an AMPAS-approved voodoo priestess activates the encryption magic by liberally splashing home theaters with freshly-sacrificed goat's blood, is not nearly as messy at is sounds.
Another weekend, another Monday morning of crushing disappointment. Also, people keep paying to see Shark Tale.
Friday
1. For some it’s a religion, for the rest of us, a form of entertainment: A Very Merry Unauthorized Children's Scientology Pageant at the Powerhouse Theatre opens tonight. We really hope the L. Ron squad doesn't show up to rough up the child actors.
2. Whoa, Duran Duran is everywhere! Boy, were we wrong about them being dead! You can meet them at the Virgin Megastore tonight.
Saturday
3. Bring style back into your life at the Mondo Lounge: “Where Cocktail Cultures Collide,” which is an event where “the lifestyle and culture of America from 1957 to 1963 and will bring together fans of Retro Fashion, Tiki, Exotica Music, Car Culture, Bachelor Pad Living, Swing Scene and Vintage Las Vegas Rat Pack era.” Or, if you're lazy, you can rent Swingers.
4. Attend the (BIG!) 18th Street Arts Complex 15th Anniversary Party in Santa Monica and reminisce about 15 years of being avant-garde, whatever that means. If you’re more of an Eastsider, check out the massive Brewery Artwalk happening downtown.
Sunday
5. Satirist extraodinaire/erstwhile blogging force Neal Pollack hits Skylight Books to support his novel Never Mind the Pollacks. We hear he's a big Bush fan, so make sure you ask him about that.
6. In the interest of giving them equal time, we'll let you know that the Church of Scientology presents the East Hollywood Community Street Festival on Sunday to convert hipsters, er, the ones with money, one at a time. Enjoy the horse and buggy rides, but whatever you do, don't let them talk you into grabbing on to those two metal rods. Trust us.
Something very, very wrong is going down in Hollywood today. Read, and then visualize, at your own peril:
A reader heads to Campanile for their vaunted Thursday night grilled cheese special, but seems to have stumbled upon an impromptu sitcom actor's convention, with musical guest Duran Duran lending to the surreal vibe. We had to so some frantic Googling to determine that the Duran Duran members mentioned are actually still alive, but we're now confident that she may not have hallucinated the entire event. Her report is after the jump.
The Movie Marketing Blog alerts us to a novel publicity ploy that grossed out NY Daily News gossip by sending him a fake severed hand in a bloody Ziploc bag to promote the movie Saw. Grove then contacted Lions Gate president Tom Ortenberg to let him know how effective the tactic was, and Ortenberg responded:
We weren't kidding when we told you not bet your homes or jobs on our box office projections, but we think there are at least two Paramount execs who are now looking for work because we backed Sky Captain.
· Lisa Kudrow's Is or Isn't Entertainment gets two more years at Warner Bros TV. One day, all the Friends will be moguls! OK, maybe not David Schwimmer. [THR]
· 8-to-12-year-old girls abandon former idol Hilary Duff and her Fame knockoff Raise Your Voice, perplexing marketers. Maybe it's time to target a new demo, hire a Lindsay Lohan lookalike to jello-wrestle with Duff in a commercial, then watch their box office soar. [THR]
· Just Shoot Me creator Steve Levitan and tarnished NBC golden-boy Jeff Zucker kiss and make up, as NBC picks up Levitan's pilot about an "egocentric African-American football star." It's just so sweet when a blood-feud ends in a shower of hugs and contracts![Variety, sub req'd.]
· Kristin Davis is in negotiations to star opposite Tim Allen in the remake of The Shaggy Dog. We know we go through this every time a SATC gal makes good, but is she the slutty one or the gay one? [THR]
· New Line, the studio built on the backs of hard-working Hobbits, tries to stay atop the fantasy game by acquiring the rights to bestseller Jonathan Strange and Mr.Norrell. [Variety, sub. req'd.]
It's been a while since we've heard any Courtney Love stories, and, frankly, we kind of missed her adorable drug-addled, microphone-bonking, contempt-of-court antics. LA.comfidential's Laurie Pike finally has some Love news, but being strapped down at rehab must have mellowed her, as she showed up for her new radio gig at Indie 103.1 a day early. What's this world coming to, where Martha Stewart is America's favorite new prison bitch and Courtney Love is practically baking cookies for her new boss? Now that she's acting puzzlingly normal, the next relapse should be truly spectacular. We're thinking a oxycontin-fueled sniper rifle attack from the top of the Santa Monica Pier ferris wheel.
Today's Page Six helpfully updates the world on Paris Hilton's itinerary for her trip to Vegas this weekend, you know, in case any people with cameras want to shout at her and take her picture. At least they removed the publicist's e-mail header before printing it. But we're not complaining, we were looking for any excuse to run this fine, month-old photograph of Hilton's preferred relaxation technique. That it's, take a deep breath, hold it...hold it...and try to forget about all this racism nastiness for a minute before you hop a private jet to the Hard Rock.
We've heard a rumor that CAA, the House That Ovitz Built But Then Ditched To Feed His Ego And Get Even More Ludicrously Wealthy, might be in talks to buy up the less elegantly initialled BWCS (Broder Webb Chervin Silbermann, there you made us type it out). Consolidation usually means layoffs, which in turn means out-of-work agents panhandling on the sidewalks of Beverly Hills. If a deal does eventually go down and you find your office building flanked by unemployed ten-percenters, do what we do—refuse eye contact and barely hide your contempt for the jobless.
1. Jane's Addiction guitarist/MTV personality Dave Navarro is signing Don’t Try This at Home at Book Soup. When Dave signs your book, ask him who's the better kisser, Carmen Electra or Anthony Kiedis?
2. For studio executives: Avoid actually having to read Shakespeare by checking out Cheek by Jowl at UCLA, a modern staging of Othello. The next time it comes up in a pitch meeting you don't have to merely pretend that you understand a writer's Iago reference.
3. Help Jeff Zucker's self-esteem by watching some of the programming formerly referred to as Must See TV. Tomorrow, be prepared to answer two questions: Why is Joey a drooling mongoloid one second and a Chandler-like quipster the next? If you had to restart the human race from scratch, is there any way you wouldn't choose The Apprentice's tough-love icon Carolyn and fake-receptionist Robin as your personal Eves?
We're well aware that Uggs are painfully over and that there are fresher evils to be combatted, but the idea of celebrity babies in tiny Ugg boots (as illustrated in this picture of the woman who has brought forth Charlie Sheen's progeny happily displaying a new, bite-sized malevolence) certainly merits a mention. Indeed, no one invited a hater to the A-list baby shower, but we feel compelled to let the world know that all celebrity baby Ugg boots are lovingly fashioned from the skin of less fortunate infants of civilian parentage. But we hope little Sam Sheen's tootsies stay extra warm in those adorable widdle Uggies!
As another blind item guessing game comes to a close, we'd like to sincerely thank all of you for playing. Also: What do you have against plus-size celebrities? You know, not *every* person in Hollywood has had work done—just the ones who have SAG cards. A quick refresher course in One Redesigning Blind Vice:
A spy files this report from last night's premiere of Eulogy at the Mann Festival in Westwood, and, more importantly, from the after party at Palomino. It's always so touching to know that bloated, fading stars like John Travolta will turn out to chew on some cake and give the scenery a much-needed respite from his teeth-marks.
Breaking: This year's Oscars might not bore the world into incontinence: The Academy has signed up Chris Rock to host. [Note to Emmy organizers: Shandling's looking like an even bigger joke right now.] The trades are so excited about the press release from AMPAS that Variety even somehow approved this unfortunate lede, "The Oscars are about to get, in Chris Rock's own words, 'bigger and black.'" Firstly, we believe it's "Bigger and Blacker." Secondly, the audience at the Kodak Theatre still will be the whitest place on earth, narrowly beating out a conference of albinos in an Alaskan snowdrift scheduled for the same night.
· Director Brett Ratner signs a two-year development deal with 20th Century Fox TV, bringing his hacky, music video-quality visual skillset to the small screen. It didn't seem possible, but Fox just got a whole lot louder! [THR]
· ABC adds Nash Bridges creator Carlton Cuse as an executive producer on their hit Lost. Say what? Don't they usually saddle a show with extraneous EPs when its tanking? ABC must have forgotten what to do when a show succeeds. They'll probably cancel it after they win their timeslot next week. [THR]
· From the circular show development file: X-files writer Frank Spotnitz is developing a Night Stalker remake for ABC, a show that was one of the main inspirations for the X-files. [Variety, sub. req'd.]
· HBO gives a script commitment to Sopranos executive producers Mitchell Burgess and Robin Green for their half-hour comedy Powerball, which will follow the life of a lotto-winning family. At least Green is tempering her expectations, admitting, "The Sopranos is the funniest television show I've ever seen in my entire life. That would be an impossible act to follow."[Variety, sub. req'd.]
· Joel Schumacher will direct The Crowded Room, a movie about a man with 24 different personalities. God, we hope two of them are Batman and Robin! [Variety, sub. req'd.]
Wherein we invite our readers to guess the maliciously obscured identity of humpy E! ubergossip Ted Casablanca's weekly blind item. Having seemingly (and hopefully, temporarily) expended his reserves of gay sex items in last week's orgy, Ted turns his attention to two of Hollywood's lasting obsessions, plastic surgery and drugs. For your guessing pleasure, One Redesigning Blind Vice:
