Carole Radziwill — the ABC news producer who found the strength to spit out a bestselling memoir after her friends John F. Kennedy Jr. and Carolyne Bessette died in a little-known plane crash and her husband, Anthony Radziwill, died of cancer three weeks later — has a new column in Glamour. For her debut, she sits down with beloved anchor-cum-book-peddler Anderson Cooper and talks about wardrobe choices. It's hardly the stuff of Radziwill's hard news past, but she does manage to get Cooper to reveal how business is conducted around CNN:

• Jenna Elfman defends Scientology by screaming in public and asking people if they've raped babies. If only she were allowed to take her medication, these outbursts could be prevented. [TMZ]
• If you watch that Thomas Friedman video again carefully, you just might notice a young lady in the background, swilling champagne. Apparently, she's his daughter — and she just graduated high school. But who doesn't booze their way through Daddy's big night? [Fishbowl NY]
• Lower East Side stinkpit Rothko shuts its doors — but where will the little hipsters dance now? [Brooklyn Vegan]
• The mathetmatical formula for Bridget Harrison. [Julia Allison]
• Andrew Hearst — the man just hired to edit Vanity Fair online — brings you Sementeen, for adolescent and teenage boys everywhere. [Panopticist]
• You kind of knew Jon Stewart would be a good tipper. [New York Hack]
• The rights to John Steinbeck's works have been awarded to his son and granddaughter, neither of whom will have to lift a finger ever again. [AP]
• Surprisingly enough, wearing your Anderson Cooper fan shirt to Anderson Cooper's book signing does not scare the silver fox. [Understandish]
• Our worldly brother Gridskipper is in desperate need of interns in New York and Los Angeles. Come join our abusive family, won't you? [Gridskipper]

• We fall to our knees and weep at the first pictures of Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt, which maybe we saw a little earlier than we were supposed to. But we don't care — her cutey-patootiness shall wait for no lawyer!
• Finally, after interminable months of uncertainty, Conde Nast gives us Porfolio. Lord knows when when we'll actually see it.
• Turns out Page Six editor Richard Johnson's DUI last week wasn't his first.
• The Coop declines to read from his book, opting instead to briefly just talk with smelly people. Afterwards, he retreats to Julio's love nest.
• We marvel at the horror of the Guccione mansion.
• Star magazine cans five employees, including two Fuller veterans.
• Wenner Media readies itself for MTV's cameras, due to start filming on Monday. Assistants begin applying makeup now.
• Krucoff attemps for the world's worst case of indigestion by eating his way around town with David Wain and Ken Marino, who will later dip his balls in it.

• Ted Turner sells his memoir for $4.5 million; David Carr sells his for $300k. [NYP]
• You shall bow before Katie and Anderson, because they are royalty. [National Journal]
• Brad is Esquire's October cover. Brad doesn't want to talk about whether he cheated on Jen. Did Esquire agree to restrictions? [WWD]

Amazing what shows up in the inbox sometimes. This one is from an otherwise-reputable serious reporter, who wouldn't be feeding us misinformation:

As the publicity train for Dispatches From the Edge keeps chugging along — and, yes, we recognize we've become a de facto (if, we hope, at least slightly mocking) part of it — his Time Warner colleagues aren't being left at the station. Time Inc. employees yesterday received a special invitation to trudge up to Columbus Circle in two weeks for a chance to meet the man themselves. It's a health benefit, apparently:

There's a certain human need to share stories of life-transforming experiences — Where were you on Sept. 11? — and so, unsurprisingly, readers have been today been emailing in their tales of attending Anderson's reading last night. Above, the photographic submission from one reader of Coopie in action. And here, a city high-school teacher who awards extra-credit points to students who attend readings and report on them sends along one student's take:

Where there is Anderson there must be Gawker. It's a law of physics. So we sent intrepid Intern Neel last night to A-Coop's big reading at the Union Square Barnes & Noble, hoping he'd catch a big enough eyeful of our hero for everyone. Alas, things did not go quite as planned. After the jump, Neel's report.

• Hearst is the a great media company with a great headquarters and great executives who do great things. Yay! [NYT]
• Actually, no, Fox Business Channel isn't going to launch anytime soon. Never mind. [B&C]
• Where's the love for E&P? [MW]
• Time Inc. has extended its deal to sell All You exclusively in Wal-mart, which means you will continue to never read it. [Mediaweek]
• Straight guys dig the Coop, too. [LAT]
• Glut of WP buyouts leads to potential glut of cake. (And to the departure of — who knew she was even a newspaper editor? — Jo Polniaczek.) [NYT]

• Is this man the Julio who Anderson Cooper keeps so very near and dear to his heart/pants? We can't confirm, but he certainly looks tailored to Anderson's rumored tastes. And he's only 25, which means he's obedient. [Eff Anderson]
• If you want to verify the status of his lover, you could just ask Anderson himself: he'll be doing a signing on June 19th at noon at the Shops at Columbus Circle, third floor. Clear your schedules now.
• Rachel Weisz gives birth to a baby boy, and absolutely no one gives a fuck. [Us Weekly]
• Josh Hartnett will give you $500 to use your "funky" LES apartment for a photo shoot. Like you wouldn't just do that for free. [Curbed]
• If Manhattan were Chicago, we'd all be a little more fat. [Kottke]
• And in other LES news, it would seem that Jay McInerney's therapist works dangerously close to Fat Baby. [H&G via Eater]
• As of the time of this posting, Greg Gutfeld is leading the poll for best HuffPo contributor by a single vote. Granted, it's actually the only vote, but he's a winner nonetheless! [BigMediaBlog]
• To celebrate the birth of her first biological daughter, Angelina Jolie's lawyers buy baby Shiloh her very own domain name. Beats a silver Tiffany rattle any day. [Defamer]
• Meanwhile, Angelina gets her own verb. To Jolie: to leave your girlfriend for another woman who was supposedly just your friend. As in, "The fucker Jolie'd me." [ONY]

We held off on mentioning this, because we thought maybe we had it recorded on a TiVo somewhere, and we were waiting for the oompa loompas to dig it up. But it turns out we don't and so instead we'll just tell you. On 360° last night, as quite a few of you rushed to inform us, the big AC went back to New Orleans, where, judging by the pictures we were sent, he auditioned for the Village People. Then he went for a ride in a "mancage." Blogger and old pal Reference Tone, who saw the segement, noted that Coopie "seemed very excited about it" and "really likes to say 'mancage.'" Some examples:

So why did HarperCollins give Anderson Cooper $1 million for his not particularly insightful and not particularly well-reviewed memoir? Because last week, the week it was published, at was the bestselling nonfiction hardcover book in the country, moving some 38,000 copies, according to Nielsen BookScan. Even that number, however, doesn't make Dispatches From the Edge the No. 1 overall book for the week. (It was No. 6.) And the anchor's memoir didn't even summit the nonfiction or biography sublists, both of which saw the paperback of Elie Wiesel's Night, recently Oprah-certfied, triumph. But we suspect Anderson is just fine with that: From what we understand, he prefers not to be on top.

Oh, of his gray distinction. Sometimes you're reminded why it's important to read your Google News Alerts very, very carefully.

• Charlie Gibson scores the ABC anchor spot, leaving poor Diane Sawyer high and dry.
• Let's put it this way: Would you want to go sit at Jared Paul Stern's old desk?
• Anderson goes on Oprah, bores us. But he was adorable on an old World News Now. And she's obsessed with death.
• You will not get to go to Africa with Nick Kristof.
• Breaking news: New Yorkers go to gyms! Even Adam Moss and Mr. Big.
• All hail Le Cirque, or so says the Wednesday media club.
• Neither the Clintons nor Shock magazine are very shocking, though the later is a guilty pleasure.
• Gay gay gay. Gay.
• Another gossip type, another book party. Make that two.
• America, this old man is your Idol. And Alessandra will do her best to tell you about it.
• West Chelsea gets even worse.
• The Fifth Avenue Apple store has been open for one full week now. Has your head exploded yet?
• And it's Memorial Day weekend. See you Tuesday.

The new memoir from our favorite CNN anchor was finally published this week — oh, you thought it was just a coincidence he was interviewed everywhere from Oprah to EW? — and we'd like to direct your attention to the book's acknowledgements. Most are professional in nature — editors, agents, the like — but one doesn't quite fit that mold. On page 212:

So we're watching Anderson on Oprah right now — how could we not? — and, as Jossip promised this morning, we don't think it tells us anything we didn't already know. But that doesn't mean there's not some interest in the retelling of the old stories — and especially in Oprah's weird fixation on, of all the details in Anderson's life, his brother's suicide in 1988. She talks about it with him, she talks about it with his mom, Gloria Vanderbilt, and she even goes so far as to bring him up to the East Side building where he grew up, and from which his brother jumped, which Anderson hasn't visited in something like 15 years. "What was that like for you, going back?" Oprah asks after showing the clip. "Yeah, it wasn't really pleasant," Anderson answers. A few moments later comes a commercial break, with a teaser for Oprah's upcoming trip to Auschwitz with Elie Wiesel. "See the Holocaust through the eyes of the man who lived it," she says in a voiceover. "Tomorrow!"

Earlier: Anderson on 'Oprah': Spoiler Alert!

Our friends at Jossip are on location in Chicago this week, where naturally they're doing things they don't do on Broadway. Among those things: Watching Oprah at 9 a.m., its timeslot in Ms. Winfrey's home market. Today's big interview with Anderson Cooper won't air for another four hours here in New York, but little Jossie generously provides a sneak peak — from which we learn that, apparently, nothing interesting transpires.

Click to enlarge.

• "His ability to remain totally upright when sprinting, as if carrying an invisible egg and spoon—what are these, if not the techniques of an alien life force who has just graduated summa cum laude in advanced human behavior?" Tom Cruise, watch out — the New Yorker is onto you, and Sy Hersh might be looking for a new beat. [NYer]
• Apple v. Apple, resolved: the Beatles' record label loses to Apple computers, meaning that we can all download the boys on iTunes with reckless, 99-cent abandon. [Variety]
• Glamour EIC Cindi Leive has been named the new prez of the American Society of Magazine Editors. Just another damn responsibility for her assistant. [FishbowlNY]
• 60 Minutes may get Anderson Cooper, but they only get him 5 times per year. He'll be filling Christine Amanpour's part-time position — what we lose in classy accents, we make up for in piercing pools of blue. [AP]
• Kaavya Viswanathan may have fucked up, but she's no James Frey. Give the girl a crackpipe, though, and anything's possible. [USA Today]
• New Jersey's new tourism slogan, "Come See For Yourself," is wisely abandoned. As it turns out, West Virginia is already using the catchphrase, along with the Dakotas and any other states no one would willingly see for themselves. [Adfreak]
• Behold the unimpressive aesthetics of the Art Rock show at Rockefeller Center. Glance now and save yourself the effort of going to the real thing. [Animal]
• Elle creative director Gilles Bensimon loses a 14-year-old beauty to a 17-year-old amateur. So, who's the young waif in question? And why is Gilles such a dirty old man? [Breakfast]