Maybe it's just us, but if you're going to announce a televised interview with Eliot Spitzer, you might want to leave the whole "intimate evening" bit out of it. [Marketwire, EOS New York]

In your plastic Wednesday media column: Greta Van Susteren explains why she's a better friend to "poor African Americans" than Barack Obama is, along with newspaper news, TV news, and New York Post blowjob news.

Things disappear so quickly these days. They just fleet past, like car lights out on the Turnpike. I'm speaking, of course, of the premature end of Real Housewives of New Jersey, a show that we'd only just gotten to know.

To be fair, a personality disorder is not the sort of thing that just takes care of itself overnight. Still, in an interview with the Washington Post, shamed horndog mill-worker's-son John Edwards sounds kinda self-important, still.

Bloomberg's been bragging it suddenly tripled its number of scoops in the first quarter. How did the financial wire do it? A company mole forwarded along one particularly egregious example.

Some brash "can-do" entrepreneur is selling a historic pair of ugly Portfolio cufflinks bearing the nonsensical slogan "Linking Business and Pleasure," which describes "Gossip" much better than "Portfolio" or "cufflinks." Please use this priceless item for the good of mediakind!

Pedro Espada, the corrupt State Senator who decided to be a Republican the other week, says he gets two votes, because he is so special. And then the Bronx District Attorney kidnapped his housekeeper.

Trying to report from a country like Iran under state-mandated censorship is hard. The Associated Press is making it harder by caving to the demands of the Iranian regime and refusing to allow its Iranian subscribers to use this photo.

• David Letterman's ratings have gone up thanks to his very public spat with Sarah Palin. So don't be the least bit surprised if it continues. [NYT]
• Ann Moore signed a new contract with Time Inc. that will keep her around through 2012; John Squires, meanwhile, has a new gig at the company. [NYP]
• Newsweek is cutting out an issue this summer. You can guess why. [WSJ]
• Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia's latest project? That would be something called "Martha University," which sounds horrifying, frankly. [PC]
• Michael Gross's new book isn't available at the New York Public Library and chances are Annette de la Renta had something to do with it. [NYO]
• Negotiations continue between the Boston Globe and union reps. "People briefed on the talks say a deal is close." Don't hold your breath. [NYT]

The Way We Live Now: Like champions. In tough times, it's all about priorities. And that priority is winning the Game of Life. Or—failing that—the Game of Golf.

Sharks, racquetballs, and pretend priests.

It's official: Betsy Morgan says she was indeed pushed out as the ineffectual CEO of the Huffington Post. But to what end? The new regime is downplaying profitability in favor of revenue growth — the ideal ramp for a sale.

The High Line celebrated its grand debut with a splashy, Calvin Klein-sponsored party on Monday night. Naturally, Lisa Falcone and her husband, Phil Falcone, were in attendance: The hedge fund founder made a $10 million donation to the elevated park a week or so before it was unveiled to the public. Lisa took a few minutes to address the crowd at Monday night's party, and her speech came off as a bit loopy, according to people who were there.

A picture that shows that some Photoshopping was used to make the crowd at a pro-Ahmedinejad rally look bigger is racing around the Internet right now. We have no idea where it's from (anyone read Farsi?) but everyone's screaming propaganda!

If you're like us, your high school graduation was in some sweaty gymnasium or on a grass-barren athletic field. Not so for the youngs of wealthy New York, who graduated in glorious fashion recently. The New York Observer was there.

New information has emerged on the child labor violations of "fledgling internet site" (ha) RadarOnline. We will cover this story with the same verve with which RadarOnline covers Octomom. Illegal, baby-endangering verve, that is!

Bill Clinton has this foundation that he does a lot of traveling and fundraising for. Recently, he went to Argentina to dine with the president. Then he had a "noche de soltero" with a "morocha" known for being very "pulposa."

Do you have friends or family coming to visit this summer? Manhattan User's Guide has a list of 100 things that you can suggest they do when they're here so they stay out of your hair. [MUG]

Sean Penn has pulled out of two films, Variety reports today. While he's saying he needs the time to work on his (continually) troubled marriage to Robin Wright, a blind item last week is fueling speculation that it's drug-related.

When the Daily Show sent Jason Jones to viciously mock the defenseless New York Times last week, the universal reaction was: Ouch. Except within the New York Times! They thought they did great.