A bill passed the NY state senate yesterday that would make assault on a taxi driver punishable by up to 25 years in jail.

Legendary Jamaican drug lord Christopher "Dudus" Coke will appear before the federal court in Manhattan today on drug and weapons charges, after being extradited to the US yesterday. The search for Coke in Jamaica claimed over 70 lives.

While some hole in Wisconsin called Stevens Point has the "best" water, New York comes in second. Which is better, because we don't look like we're trying too hard. And it's true! New York's water is delicious. Whose water isn't?

Over the weekend some kids in Washington Heights left seven Drano bombs outside a school, but none of them exploded. No self respecting kid in the suburbs would ever build a dud Drano bomb.

It's easy to make fun of New Jersey, the state affectionately known as the "Armpit of America." You can't make left turns, the whole place smells like a diaper, and that show? Yeah. But some proud residents are fighting back.

[Participants in the 2010 Mermaid Parade at Coney Island yesterday. Each year, people dress up in crazy costumes and march as an homage to the old Coney Island Mardi Gras.] (Pic via Getty)

Governor David Paterson and state lawmakers, as part of an emergency (still non-existant) budget bill, are adding an additional $1.60 tax on cigarettes sold in New York, meaning a pack bought in the city would cost $5.85 extra in tax.

A participant in the "Red Bull Air Race: New York" zips through the sky over the Hudson River. Whose idiot idea was sending airplanes careening through downtown New York's air space? Another image below.

New York's State Liquor Authority just approved a 192-proof (96% alcohol) Polish vodka. Spirytus is "incredibly sharp. It takes your breath away," according to a random boozehound the Daily News interviewed. "It's like getting punched in the solar plexus."

Feds say a New York counterfeiting ring they busted had a stash of more than half a million knockoff Trojan condoms, according to the Times. These condoms lacked spermicide and "failed water leakage tests." But they look so real! [NYT]

Is there any more reliably ridiculous demographic than "Manhattan heiress?" They have so much money they can bribe the whole world into dealing with their zany neuroses. Here's one woman, Dana Hammond, who is irrationally afraid of HIV.

It only took the NYC Department of Health and the Metro Transit Authority two years to conclude a study that says rats live in subway stations, are hard to catch/kill, and like to dine in subway stations' "refuse room."

Rich people—they're just like us. When the economy tanked in 2008 they felt the pain, too. Even Mayor Bloomberg, worth an estimated $18 billion, was forced to rent out some of his property and lay off servants.

Just in case you haven't had your fill of Internet Week New York-related goodness yet, here's a video from CNN that examines the mysterious trend of techie people who *gasp* like to throw and attend parties, including the Webutante Ball.

Did you ever wonder what went on during Internet Week New York, but weren't around to see for yourself? Well, thanks to this video by NYC Media, anyone can take a peek inside the festivities in all their nerdy glory.

The judge investigating Governor David Paterson's career-ending alleged role in a domestic violence case, Judith Kaye, has yet to even interview him. She told the Journal, "I hope to have something that's prompt and comprehensive." Take your time! [Metropolis]

Tourists suck. Use this map to avoid them in New York. Using Flickr's geotagging feature, Eric Fisher created this heat map showing where tourists took pictures versus where locals did. Red is tourists, blue is locals. (Click to enlarge.)

Remember when an anonymous genius divided the sidewalk on Fifth avenue into lanes for "tourists" and "New Yorkers?" Turns out it was Improv Everywhere—the same folks behind the annual No Pants Subway Ride. Click through for their video.

After a rocky start, Bernie Madoff has finally settled into prison life. He hangs with spies, haggles over laundry, and bitches about his former clients: "I carried them for twenty years, and now I'm doing 150 years."

NY Post intern James Cahalan hit the jackpot: For an exposé on underage drinking, his employer sent him on a 30-stop bar crawl to see who would serve him. Byline and free booze—do summer internships get any better?