She said that in the few hours since her departure had been made public, she had received several offers "of all kinds" for future employment, which she declined to specify.

Judith Miller, you've just been humiliated by and forced to retire from the newspaper where you've worked for 28 years! Where are you going?

But, boy, is there a lot of shouting.

Times vet Kit Seelye, who has been in the unenviable position of covering Millerpalooza for the paper, does a characteristically nice job of reporting what one hopes is its final chapter. Her comprehensive article on the "retirement," posted just minutes after its announcement, via Keller's staff memo — it's almost as though she had an inside track or something! — contains this money bit:

And, lo, it is written:

• Are Men Necessary? is "a very odd, occasionally entertaining mish-mash of politics and sex, biology and Cosmopolitan-ology, gravity and wit, insight and carelessness." We don't care what it is; we'd just like to stop hearing about it. [NYO]
• And Maureen should go away for a while, too. [MW]
• Republican senators want another investigation of a leak to reporters. You know, because the last one worked out so well for their party. [WP]
• Anna Wintour may or may not be out to kill The Devil Wears Prada film. [Radar]
• Teen People lands racist teenie-boppers Prussian Blue, who apprently think — wrongly — they'll be getting editorial control. Isn't it fun to pull one over on Nazis? [NYP]
• Memogate producer Mary Mapes was right and everyone else was wrong, insists Memogate producer Mary Mapes. [WP]
• Less demand than expected for lunch with Rupert Murdoch. Which is fine news indeed. [Guardian]
• HBO documentary chief likes both highbrow and porn, and, likely, she'll soon snag Ted Koppel. [NYP]
• Apparently, Esquire had cool covers in the sixties. [MB]
• Meet Judy Miller without traveling to Sag Harbor — only $375! [HuffPost]
• As a kid, New Yorker essayist Adam Gopnik used to sneak out after bedtime — to read. Which is somehow unsurprising. [S.F. Chronicle]
• 135K paid users have signed up for TimesSelect. As if you can't get more than enough Maureen for free these days. [E&P]
• Anderson Cooper does the self-deprecating shtick well, too. [Philadelphia Inquirer]
• Prediction: New ABC anchors will be Elizabeth Vargas and Bob Woodruff. Peter, however, would have wanted Charlie Gibson. [Newsday]
• Because one is never enough, negotiations continue at the Times continue over another fired reporter. [Media Mob/NYO]
• No one wants to read TV Guide offshoot Inside TV. [WWD]

Oh, thank you, Gabriel Sherman, for finally bringing us some new Judy Miller news: She's leaving again! So what if it's a double-reverse of what you told us last week — at least it's something. (And, in fairness, you nicely explain away last week's she's-sticking-around story, reporting that the don't-go plan was a hopeful, quixotic trial balloon from Sulzberger, floated to see if maybe — just maybe — they could all be friends again. They can't.)

• Syd Schanberg says journalism's big problem is insufficient transparency — that is, not enough journalism about journalism. In next week's "Press Clips," we fill him in on the existence of Jim Romenesko. [VV]
• Amid yesterday's newspaper-circ horror show, Post gains on News. Yay! [NYP]
• Yet the News is still ahead. Yay! [NYDN]
• Never mind the Judy mess; NYT still hasn't fulfilled post-Jayson promises. [PR Week]
• Why'd Andrew Heyward stick around CBS News for so long after the Memogate debacle? For his pension to kick in, of course. [Radar]
• Can't figure out why you should care about the recent sale rumblings at Knight Ridder? Because no less is at stake than — cue ominous music — the entire future of print journalism. Well, fuck. [LAT]
• Ted Koppel is leaving Nightline, in case you didn't know. [WP]

Here's all we got, sent in late yesterday afternoon: "Just saw Judith Miller sitting in Eileen's Cheesecake over on Kenmare Street. I did a double-take, as I thought she was Anna Wintour in her Vogue-worthy seafoam pants suit and bobbed coif. She was talking seriously to a blonde female companion and was gesturing intensely. I wonder what she could be upset about...."

Here's an idea for why Judy Miller had to go away — and why she's still away, and why no conclusion can be reached. She hasn't been in Sag Harbor at all, goes the theory — that claim is as invented as her "security clearance." Clearly, as a vigilant, and, apparently, televisually polylingual, reader has discovered, Miller has been off working on an Italian telenovela, Provaci ancora Prof. (In English, that's Prof Still Tries to Us. Or at least so says Babelfish. Of which we're becoming increasingly skeptical.)

• Never mind Judy Miller; everything about working at the Times sucks right now. [WP]
• Of course, the entire newspaper business sucks right now, at least judging from the new circ numbers. [E&P]
• In a bid to create the most conservative editorial page in the history of the planet, Rupert Murdoch wants to buy the Journal, although he knows it's not for sale. [WSJ]
• Microsoft leads the crowded pack of companies interested in buying AOL. [NYT]
• The problem, however, is that AOL sucks ass. [AdAge]
• Anderson Cooper is termed a "boyish metrosexual," in which five of the seven syllables are accurate. [Boston Globe]
• New MSNBC show will be like dinner at the Chung-Povitch's. Just what we've always wanted. [NYT]
• Libby trial might be toughest on reporters — Miller, Cooper, and Russert. [WSJ]
• Glamour editor discovers gender imbalance in top mags' bylines. Glamour, on the other hand, we're sure has a masthead that, to use Clinton's term, "looks like America." [NYT]

Tumbleweed, more or less.

This much we know: Generalissimo Judith Miller is still not dead.

Yesterday we learned that Judy Miller might now be — who'd have thunk it — staying at the Times, and yet today there's no follow-up. (Timesman David Barstow made a very limited Judy defense in Utah, but that doesn't count.) There's nothing more from the Observer, no second-day piece from the Times itself or from the Journal, nothing new, even, from Arianna Huffington.

As if it's not sad enough that Judy Miller is now seeking career counseling under the guise of "reporting," it's even worse that this once high-powered, well-sourced investigative dynamo has been reduced to posting on ProfNet, American's best way for lazy reporters to meet eager quote whores.

Hey, so remember last week when everyone said Judy Miller was on her way out of the Times? Well, hold up there, cowboy, because the winds they are a-shiftin'. As of today: Judy's back!

Every now and then, something cross our inbox so brilliant that we couldn't possibly add anything to it. (Rephrase: Every now and then, something cross our inbox so unbelievably brilliant that we're, atypically, not arrogant enough to think we can improve it.) This is one of those times. Ladies and gentleman, from the fertile mind of Mr. Andrew Hearst:

Little new Judy Miller news today — she's still a Times employee, she's still not actually going in to work, she still doesn't have a book deal — except for yet another nail in the coffin, this time from L.A. Times house leftie Bob Scheer, who, in a neat rhetorical trick, blames Miller for John Kerry's presidential loss. But it's more than that; he just kind of hates Miller — her "theatrics," that she "cared far more about protecting someone who abused his power ... than about protecting the right of Wilson to speak truth to power." He, clearly would like to see her gone, too.

• R.W. Apple Jr., the Times political reporter-turned- professional gourmand and a guy who knows a thing or two about bigfooting through the newsroom, spoke yesterday at the Texas Book Festival. He was there to read from a new book on food, reports the Austin American-Statesman, but also ended up taking questions on politicis. "Apple, who had flattering things to say about Miller's doggedness as a reporter, nonetheless called her 'relentless and totally out of control,'" said the paper.

We're still accepting entries in the Millerpalooza Sweepstakes. Have a guess on when Judy finally puts on her Panama hat and leaves 43rd Street for the last time? Then play along. Read the rules here, and then send your guess to us here: tips@gawker.com. Here's the new wrinkle, though: The entry period will end at midnight tonight. So get your guesses in soon, or you may never get to taste the delicious, delicious yellowcake.