how-to

Loose Wires: Industry of Cool

Nick Douglas · 10/03/06 02:23AM
  • Missed out on every significant Valleywag post since June? Forbes writer Erika Brown wraps up the creep of "cool" into Silicon Valley. By finishing with a quote from Almost Famous, she's won me over. [Forbes]

Chaos theory: How to tell if a Google deal means anything

Nick Douglas · 09/27/06 12:31PM

We already know why Google announces so many useless partnerships, or at least one fringe benefit for the company, which is to signify that everyone is on its side, not Yahoo's or Microsoft's. Now Fortune Magazine reiterates: "Working with Google and grumbling about it is quite in fashion." There are so many deals and rumors of deals out there, how can anyone tell which deserve attention? Easy: Which exec made 'em?

Valley trick #2: You can survive without owning the dot-com

Nick Douglas · 09/20/06 08:05PM

Online branding is more sophisticated than the old dot-com days (when, for example, fishing company Zapata moved into Internet media just because it owned zap.com), thanks to Google rank and word-of-mouth marketing. It's still brave to launch a site using any address other than "sitename.com," but several popular sites do just fine without.

Don't be a flack: Tips for PR workers from the journalists who hate them

Nick Douglas · 09/13/06 07:23PM

Today a flack from public relations firm SS PR sent me yet another piece of spam following up an e-mail pitch I never asked for, proving that PR folks need some guidance in how to avoid being "that annoying flack" that journalists and business development workers gossip about at the bar. Because by pleasing journalists, you don't just help them — you help yourself.

How to be a Silicon Valley cynic

Nick Douglas · 09/11/06 07:57PM

You're still "post-modern"? Dude, that's so five ideologies ago. Don't worry, take this crash course in Silicon Valley cynicism and no one will know you're not a quasi-meta-pomo-pseudohipster just like the rest of us.

How to name your merger rumor

Nick Douglas · 08/31/06 08:00AM

Every week brings a new merger rumor, and just like celebrity couples (Bennifer! TomKat! Vive la diff rance!), every merger needs its portmanteau. So remember the official merger names:

Joining a startup? Top 6 questions you shouldn't ask

Nick Douglas · 08/03/06 02:16PM

The startup vet at OnStartups.com (motto: "Those who can't IPO, teach") listed six great questions anyone joining a startup should ask, including "How much cash is there, where did it come from and how long will it last?" and "Will the founders get along when the going gets tough?"

How to have fun on Eons, the social network for old people

Nick Douglas · 08/01/06 08:24PM

Now that Gen-Xers are camped out on Friendster, teens dominate MySpace and Facebook, and the youngest baby boomers are rocking LinkedIn, retirees can join Eons, the new social network for the 50+ crowd. Details like the "obits" button might scare some folks away, but in the right hands, they're the pieces for a very fun game.

Worst 13 geek pickup lines ever

Nick Douglas · 07/27/06 10:00AM

A friend passed in this overheard pickup line: "I'm gonna put my wiki in your portal, baby."

Del.icio.us, I'm looking at you

Nick Douglas · 07/17/06 03:53PM

"With all the 2.0 hype, I think it's unfair to unanimously declare all new Internet startups as 100% junk. It can't be much more than 95%." The blogger at cynical site Dead2.0 thus introduces an impressive how-to for businesses that want to make the magic 5% cut. Here's Dead2.0's list (minus the insightful explanations) with the sites we think should listen up.

So you need to defame your enemies!

Nick Douglas · 06/30/06 12:07PM

You tried fair competition. You tried fake friendliness. Sucker. The only way you'll take your enemies down is an all-out smear campaign. Don't make it sloppy. Unless you follow the dictims of dishonor, your tactics will backfire like a Tijuana burrito-eating contest. Besmirch by the rules: