· Reality TV juggernaut Endemol and video game monolith Electronic Arts are partnering up in cyberspace with the lofty interactive aim of allowing users to create lifelike avatars that can scream at virtual briefcases or endure prolonged confinement in Ikea-furnished online dwellings, bringing the magic of hits like Deal or No Deal and Big Brother to your computer screen. [Variety]
· For the first time in history, the words "bona fide boxoffice force" are used to describe Disturbia's Shia LeBeouf. [THR]
· Revolution's Joe Roth, now an independent producer, has 10 pics lined up, including a live-action Alice in Wonderland, a Meryl Streep 9/11 project called Ann's List, and two projects with Julia Roberts attached. [Variety]
· Ted Danson joins the cast of Mad Money, best known as the project that will make us forget about all the Tom Cruise weirdness and re-establish Katie Holmes as the leading star of her generation. [THR]
· If NBC picks up another season of low-rated critical darling Friday Night Lights, its producers promise to de-emphasize the football-related plotlines which may be scaring sportsphobic viewers away. [Variety]

Lucky and Flo, the MPAA's quadruped crimefighting duo that's a DVD pirates' worst, furry-faced nightmare, have left Malaysia for the shores of the Philippines, putting some much-needed distance between them and any Malaysian mercenaries out to claim the reported $14,286 bounty on their heads. Currently in Manila, the dogs have quickly put their polycarbonate-sniffing skills to good use:

In what is easily the most unexpected superhero casting news since it was announced in September that Robert Downey, Jr. would be donning Iron Man's exoskeleton, Variety reports that fellow card-carrying Serious Actor Edward Norton has signed on for an Incredible Hulk sequel planned for release next summer:

The L.A. edition of GLAAD's annual media awards were held Saturday night, when the anti-defamation organization with the poorly camouflaged hard-on for Hollywood can finally indulge a year's worth of celebrity reacharound fantasies, honoring the wonderful visibility-related work being done by famous Gays and Gay-Friendlies of every letter-designated caste. A round-up:
· Recovering slur victim T.R. Knight opened the ceremonies, telling the gathered crowd, "I am angry at the inequality we face every day. I hope to turn my anger into action." He then encouraged the audience to "imagine that eclair in front of you is Isaiah Washington," and instructed them to attack the pastry accordingly with their dessert forks. [AfterElton]
· Knight later responded to reporters' questions about how things have been between him and gayhabbed co-star Isaiah Washington behind the scenes at Grey's Anatomy (which, ironically, took the outstanding individual episode award), Knight evasively replied, "I just focus on doing the work. That's my job; that's what I'm paid for; and I think that's enough." [AccessHollywood] [CBSNews.com]

It's hardly a secret that big-budget Hollywood moviemaking is perhaps the most financially wasteful of human endeavors, with each prospective blockbuster production lavishing hundreds of thousands of dollars (if not millions) in perks to ensure the constant comfort of its above-the-title talent, who can only practice their craft if their demands for individual pedicurists for each toe and a double-wide equipped with a spa-tub that bubbles forth perfectly chilled Cristal at the touch of a button are fully met. Sunday's LAT featured a must-read Special! Report! revealing the budget of high-eight-figures loser Sahara "confidentially" submitted as an exhibit in the ongoing lawsuits between author Clive Cussler and producer Philip Anschutz, two fierce combatants in the process of suing the living shit out of one another (we apologize for the use of that highly technical legal jargon) in an attempt to figure out who bears the majority of the blame for the movie's profound failure. After the jump, we've excerpted some of the budget's highlights; the Times is careful to disclaim that "actual expenses may have varied from budgeted items," leaving some hope that impenetrably accented actress Penelope Cruz's dialogue coaches, who would have been woefully underpaid at the stated $125,804, ultimately received substantial additional remuneration for bravely performing one of the most dangerous and thankless jobs in all of show business:

We've received a couple of reports that CAA's Century City Death Star, whose weapons systems were finally nearing full operability following a major setback caused by a likely rebel-agency attack on their baby-preparation facilities back in late January, has again been evacuated early this morning. Details are still sketchy, but we're told there are multiple fire trucks and a helicopter (presumably not one from CAA's vaunted air-defense fleet) at the scene. Drop us a line: We'll share updates, reports, and action cameraphone photos of agents milling around outside the building as they become available.

Take a moment to appreciate the specialness of this Monday morning, where Shia LaBeouf is currently the biggest movie star in America. No one will begrudge you a little vodka in your coffee as you try to adjust to the brave new world in which you suddenly find yourself living. The weekend box office numbers, served cold:

· Joe Francis Gone Jailed, Indicted, and Busted Behind Bars.
· Larry Birkhead's moment of babydaddy truth, as prophesied by that ridiculous tattoo on his lower back.
· Grindhouse tanks, as Harvey scrambles to rebuild it shorter, stronger, and faster.
· We think the legendary prankster doth protest too much.
· Don't feel bad, Lloyd. They aren't getting any, either.
· If the disabled don't make you laugh, maybe Lee Majors will.
· South Park's snuke.
· Imus takes two bullets.
· Billboardtron: From building to billboard to building again!
· This accident smells a lot like Mischa Barton.
· You can never be too rich, too thin, or too divorced.
· Is Sanjaya just suffering from pitchiness thetans?
· "Help me battle the malicious forces trying to say my $55 million 'thanks for letting me do you all these years' present to my girlfriend is a piece of shit!"
· He's Michael Bay! He's still got the power!

· Will Ferrell has met his match in a beer-swilling, swearing, baby landlord. This one really deserves a feature-length treatment.
· "Jerry Maguire" (Steinberg, not Cruise) is popped for a DUI after smashing into some parked cars.
· The Redline crew offers a classy tribute to their lost Enzo.
· Us Weekly's utterly bizarre love affair with onetime Nicole Richie diddler Brody Something is showing no signs of cooling off.

Just a quick note about a technical-type situation that will be going down late tonight: Due to what's being referred to as a "server move" by the home office, parts of this site (comments, links, and what-have-you) may be inaccessible or not function properly until midday-ish tomorrow, with the possibility that the whole thing might intermittently disappear during the behind-the-scenes work. Such is the cost of what we're promised is "progress."

The WOW Report brings us these photos of—amazingly!—not David Hasselhoff, but a doppelganger from Belfast, currently seeking representation as a lookalike available for local appearances. The above photos—again, we feel the need to remind you that they are not actually of David Hasselhoff—were accompanied by the following cover note:

A Defamer operative just forwarded us this MySpace distress signal issued by Redline producer Daniel Sadek, alerting the world to Hollywood's coordinated efforts to prevent future maverick filmmakers from stepping outside their outdated, exclusionist system and spending $55 million of their own money to impress their out-of-work actress girlfriends. Even if the nefarious forces aligned against our producing hero do manage to poison the internets against Redline and contribute to the disappointing opening weekend we all fear is coming, they can't kill its vital, fast-cars-and-loose-women-in-skimpy-underthings spirit, which will live on through its truly stunning web presence.

Friday
· Music round-up: Ted Leo and the Pharmacists at the El Rey; Peanut Butter Wolf and Honeycut at the Getty; The Southland at the Viper Room.
· Margaret Cho brings her "The Sensuous Woman" show to Largo, where she and her pals will embrace all things feminine.
· Much buzzed-about first-time noveilist Joshua Ferris reads from his new book, Then We Came to the End, at Skylight Books.
Saturday
· More music: The Ponys at the Echo; Three Bad Jacks at the Troubadour; KCRW's Sounds Eclectic Evening at the Gibson Amphitheatre, featuring Lily Allen, Cold War Kids, and the Shins.
· Performance artist Ann Magnuson's Pretty Songs & Ugly Stories cabaret finishes its two-night run at the Steve Allen Theater.
Sunday
· And still more music: The Shins at the Orpheum; Charlie Louvin at Amoeba Records; Swingin' Utters at the Knitting Factory.
· William Jefferson "Bill" Clinton, of being the leader of the free world fame, speaks at the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion.

If you're like us, the first time you achieved "awareness" of Redline— the fancy-cars-go-really-fast flick that will likely have a hammerlock on eighth place at the box office this weekend—was when onetime Undercover Brother star Eddie Griffin totaled a $1.3 million Ferrari Enzo at a promotional event for the still-obscure movie, an accident so spectacularly fortuitous as to invite uncharitable theories that it was staged. Today's LAT once again thrusts the independently financed and distributed film into our consciousness (we'd forgotten about its existence the moment we were told that cinematic treasure Griffin was going to be OK), noting that at first blush, the whole thing might seem like just an excuse for a bored millionaire to show off his collection of absurdly expensive automobiles, but upon digging slightly deeper, we'd all discover the project was conceived in love, not merely ego:

PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are submitted by our readers, and are posted several times a week, and your tenth sighting gets a free selection from our pastry case! Submit yours to tips[AT]defamer.com (please put "sighting" or "PrivacyWatch" in the subject line) and give Macaulay Culkin's My Girl love interest Anna Chlumsky serious cause for concern.

It's a big day for Shia LaBeouf: Not only does his movie Disturbia (about a dystopic future in which dinner-spoiling telemarketers rule the world) open, but Steven Spielberg has made official the already confirmed, then denied, now super-duper reconfirmed news that the young actor will indeed be co-starring in Indy 4:

Please join us in our weekly act of knee-dirtying gratitude for this week's sponsors, whose fine products and services are the only thing that can make all our lives worth living. If you'd like to advertise on Defamer and be included on next Friday's bullet-pointed honor roll, see this page.


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· Directors Bryan Singer and Gus Van Sant race to be first into production with their competing biopics about Harvey Milk (The Mayor of Castro Street and The Untitled Fuck Bryan Singer, I'm Doing This Anyway Project, respectively), the first openly gay elected official in America. [Variety]
· Appropriately cartoon-like actress Christina Ricci joins the cast of Warner Bros.' Speed
Racer adaptation, joining Susan Sarandon, John Goodman, and Emile "The Wachowskis Were Big Fans Of My Understated Work In 'The Girl Next Door'" Hirsch. [THR]
· A pick-up happy Showtime renews The Tudors and This American Life for second seasons, then greenlights a new Tracey Ullman series, State of the Union, in which the semichameleonic actress could disguise herself as "Arianna Huffington in her Los Angeles boudoir, David Beckham and wife Victoria with the L.A. Galaxy or Nancy Pelosi at her D.C. dermatologist" in any given episode. [Variety]
· NBC cleans house on its returning summer-schedule-filler competition shows, jettisoning the old faces of America's Got Talent, The Biggest Loser, and Last Comic Standing in favor of fresh hosting meat. [THR]
· Var philosopher-king Peter Bart asks deceptively "trivial" questions of Hollywood designed to melt the industry's collective, underutilized mind. [Variety]

In the interest of keeping our readers informed about exciting opportunities to achieve the kind of worldwide fame that only participation on a basic cable reality-competition program can afford, we pass along news of Bravo's opening casting call for the next installment of Project Runway being held downtown all afternoon. Glory awaits:

Joe Francis's terrible, horrible, no good, very bad week continued yesterday as he was formally charged on multiple counts for bribing a guard for a bottled water, leading to the discovery of cash and prescription meds in his cell. The AP is quick to remind us, however, that beneath every soft-core mogul and alleged despoiler of teenage virgins lies just a scared little boy and the mother who loves him: