These are the funniest, or timeliest, or wittiest comments we could find this year. There was a long, long list to cull from, so really you should all consider yourself winners. Especially ten of you.
Best comment of the week medals go to:
You know what are always fun (well, mostly for us)? Commenter executions. Yeah, some of you nogoodniks have been running around with impunity for too long. So today eight of you are getting culled.
Our favorite comments of the week are after the jump. Pretty much everyone did well this week, as always, but here in America we like to reward the few and ignore the many. Enjoy.
Welcome to another group-live-blogging hour filled with possibilities — although my watching along won't be one of them. I'm stuck in a Bravo-free hotel in Vegas this week on business trip, so my quest tonight will be a quixotic one: hosting the live-blog of a Top Chef episode (starting at 10 Eastern) that I can't watch. But that's probably apt, because impossibility seems to be a theme tonight. Consider, for example, this list of highlights from last week's live blog:
Multitalented — that's one of many qualities I like about the crowd that gathers here each Wednesday night to comment on Top Chef (starting at 10 Eastern.) They can drink. They can tell jokes. They can … presumably do something for a living. And many can cook! And cook fancy stuff, even! So tonight, my "highlights from last week" involve the culinary feats performed not by "cheftestants," but by my fellow commenters. The fact that it was Thanksgiving Eve likely played a role, but everyone seemed to be cooking something special while they were live-blogging last week. Here's a sampling:
Hail, pilgrims! Ready to talk turkey on Top Chef? Who's up for some candid yammering? (I know. My Thanksgiving puns are awful. I'll do better on Christmas Eve, I promise.) In case you're new to this ritual, it starts at 10PM Eastern, when we all turn on Top Chef and post comments about it. And rest assured that no turkeys will be harmed in the process (although many a cocktail is likely to bite the dust). Before we dig in, here are some highlights from last week's live blog:
Yesterday when we posted the infamous ad agency sex tape, our video department thoughtfully censored the clip by superimposing a Thanksgiving turkey over the center of the action. This led to a smorgasboard (HEH) of Thanksgiving-themed jokes in the comments. So in honor of our peerless commenters, and because it's the afternoon before Thanksgiving, we're posting the best (?) below. Vote in the comments for the one that makes you groan the least:
Every so often one commenter serves the public body in singularly superb fashion. These comrades deserve recognition individually-a chance to come forward and take a bow. Today we honor commenter CodePink, who in her weird, warm, wise, and always funny way makes the days tick by just a little faster. Enjoy five of her best comments this week after the jump. Nobody does it better.
When the NYT Company slashed its dividend and announced ominous October revenues yesterday, we asked you, our kindly readers: Might this company go into bankruptcy? If so, when? And if not, what should they do? Many of you answered! And virtually every viable option for the company was suggested at least once. The Sulzberger family should just read the following list of your responses and pick one, depending on how optimistic they're feeling today:
The optimist:
Welcome to another Wednesday-night cornucopia of commenting goodness. This is the reality show live blog where (starting at 10 Eastern) everyone can join in — even ignorant folks who think a vinaigrette is an emulsion. But while such people are welcome to participate, I think they are sadly misinformed: A vinaigrette is not an emulsion. I know this because Stefan says so. And who am I to argue with Stefan? Last week I picked him to win this whole thing, and so far he's making me look like a genius. Before we get started, a quick announcement: Remember that live blog rule I mentioned last week about not second-guessing the judges because, unlike them, we can't taste the food? I've decided to retract that, based on an epiphany I experienced after discovering a Bravotv.com feature called "rate the plate." There, site visitors can grade each dish from last week's episode on a scale of 1 to 5. Seeing this made me realize that I'd forgotten a key cultural norm of the new millennium: Judging something no longer requires actual knowledge of how good that thing is. If Maxim can give a two-star rating to a Black Crowes album they never heard, and Bravo can ask website visitors to rate food dishes they've never tasted … well, who am I to judge this new judging norm? So judge away, live bloggers! In fact, I just went to bravotv.com myself and rated all of last week's dishes, awarding my highest score to Eugene's "dry rub lamb with basmati sweet rice, tzatziki with tandoori glaze." I gave it a 4. It would have scored a perfect 5, but it looked like he used a tad too much salt. And while I was on Bravo's site, I also watched a few preview clips of tonight's episode. So here are a few "things to watch for" as we live-blog tonight:
The week after a vacation is always hard and I found myself missing the West several times over these few quickly darkening days. Luckily I had your wonderful comments to help me soldier on through. Many were good, but we breathe, sleep, and toil in a culture that only rewards the few, and so we'll do our part after the jump. There you'll find the five "best" comments of the week, as chosen by us, and the Party Pick comment, chosen by you.
Welcome, reality-TV junk-food junkies! Our commenter live blogs for Project Runway were such a blast, Gawker let us re-plate the whole concept for new season of Top Chef (in New York!), which kicks off at 10 Eastern tonight. So turn on Bravo, grab the alcoholic beverage of your choice and limber up those commenting fingers. (And here's a tip from the Glad family of products: To protect your keyboard or laptop from drunken spills, just zip it inside an extra-large Glad food storage bag!) I am your live-blog maitre d', Monsieur Hippity, and allow me to start things off by suggesting the first rules of our Top Chef commenter drinking game (suggest more rules in comments!): Take a drink every time … 1. Someone says the word "inedible," "palate," "tangy," "acid"/"acidic," "cheftestant," "challenge," "infused" or "plate" (as a verb). 2. A contestant "bleep-swears." 3. Padma shouts "utensils down!" 4. Something bursts into flame (whether by accident or design). Next, a few general live-blog rules. 1. Please don't use the word "cheftestant," just because I hate that word (pet peeve, sorry). 2. Try not to argue that the judges' opinions are unfair, because let's face it: They can actually taste the food, and we can't. (That's just the way it is with this show: Until somebody invents taste-o-vision, we have to take the judges at their word regarding what sucks and what doesn't.) 3. Don't post spoilers and/or spoil posters. Finally, here are a few of my impressions of this season after watching (too many) promo clips posted on bravotv.com. First impression: Reputed pot-imbiber Padma looks even more stoned than usual lately. (Here's an overshare: In one clip, Padma dreamily intoned, "I want every part of my palate to really be stimulated," and it gave me a culinary boner.) Other impressions: This season's contestant group looks refreshingly "global" (with origins from places like Hawaii, Italy, Finland, Spain and India) as well as promisingly eccentric. Examples include:
In the future the history books will say this election was fought across blog posts and in the comment trenches, via video links and perpetual forwards. History books will be full of shit, obv, because 99% of the internet noise about the election was barely readable garbage and nonsense. Our resident expert in garbage and nonense, is, of course, Comments Czar Kaila, who decides which of you get to live to comment another day. So below, for your Election Day, Kaila shares some of the very best of the best of insane rejected comments. "Fuck you you fucking liberal elitist fucks," after the jump! Leave 'em hanging: Palin Emails Real
This has been an epic week, mostly because I feel sick and sorry for myself and my friends got married on Sunday. But you guys also made it a pretty big week, with some excellent Long Comments. We've awarded three of you for your outstanding tomes, and of course named the Party Pick for your favorite comment of the week after the jump.
Oh what a week! There was a debate and more politics than it was previously thought the human race could endure. Only time will tell if we actually can! Maybe we'll all turn to dust next week. What we can definitely withstand and, I dare say, what we enjoy are good comments from you folks. So after the jump read our and your picks for the best of the week.
