Next Tuesday won't be the most lucrative fundraiser of the Obama campaign, but it might be the most glam. Calvin Klein, Anna Wintour, and Andre Leon Talley are chairing a fundraising event for the campaign, An Evening with Michelle Obama. Naturally, the aspiring first lady will be the main event, not her (occasionally sartorially-challenged) husband. But Michelle seems to have already made a deep impression on the fashion set: Talley and Hamish Bowles (who shares Miche's passion for purple) took time to lavishly praise her faux pearls, Jackie O. dresses, and Azzedine Alaïa belts in the Times last weekend. The $1,000-a-head fundraiser will take place at the Sikkema Jenkins gallery on West 22nd Street. Feeling especially generous or social climby? The standard $2,300 will score you a one-on-one photo with Mrs. O, and $10,000 will get you an invite to dinner at Calvin Klein's triplex on Perry Street.

• Russell Simmons lost $15,000 worth of jewelry last Saturday after an employee left a suitcase full of his bling in the hallway of a Bleecker Street apartment building for 30 minutes. The mogul's reps deny the jewels were even his—they say the stolen merch belonged to the employee—but either way, the NYPD is on the case. [Page Six]

This just in: Deals advertised on Craigslist may not be as fabulous as they appear. Just ask the 12 New Yorkers who responded to an ad on the site offering discounted iPhones in bulk, thinking they were in for a steal, which they were—just not in the way they expected. After showing up to conduct the transactions in locations that scream you're about to be robbed!—deserted corners of Flatbush and Flatlands—the naifs were robbed at gunpoint by four teenaged hoods. In one case, the four made off with as much as $2,000 in cash. Of course, if you want to buy your iPhones in bulk and sell them for a hefty profit, you don't have risk life and limb. Even if you hit the Apple store and pay $399 for the first-generation model, you'll still generate a nice return when you offload them to a Russian plutocrat for $700 a piece.

Another guilty plea from the people behind Eliot Spitzer's favorite high-class prostitution ring: Mark Brener, 62, the ringleader of Emperors Club VIP, pleaded guilty to conspiracy as part of a deal he struck with prosecutors. The Israeli native's plea comes a week after his girlfriend, Cecil Suwal, also pleaded guilty to conspiracy, and a month after booking agent Temeka Lewis pleaded guilty to similar charges. The aging Brener can now look forward to 24 to 30 months in prison, lending further credence to that old chestnut, "It's hard out here for a pimp."

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Now that he's reported to be dating fashion princess Tory Burch, it's not all that surprising that Lyor Cohen is the process of trading up in the Hamptons. The Warner Music CEO recently layed out $6.8 million for a place in North Haven. Unfortunately, the happy couple won't be able to stay there for a while, since Lyor's planning on tearing down the existing house to make room for an even bigger, more fashionable manse. (They'll continue staying at Lyor's Bridgehampton home in the meantime.) So what exactly does the $6.8 million teardown look like? Have a gander at the home (and the 170 feet of waterfront land with beach access) before it's gone.

Attention, natives of Puebla residing illegally in Bergen County: Lou Dobbs may be running for Governor of New Jersey! CNN's most unrepentent xenophobe is mulling a gubernatorial bid, the Newark Star-Ledger reports today. Dobbs, whom a few like-minded immigrant-haters unsucessfully tried to persuade to run for president this year, is said to be considering a run against Democratic incumbent Jon Corzine, who is now saddled with a 52% disapproval rating. The normally voluble commentator isn't commenting on the rumors, but many state Republicans want nothing to do with the idea. One local GOP operative, David Norcross, calls the prospect of Dobbs in the Governor's Mansion "dreadful." In the unlikely scenario Lou does run and win, Gov. Dobbs may not go so far as to personally escort New Jersey's illegals out of the state, but you can rest assured he won't be offering them driver's licenses anytime soon.

• For what may be the 273th time, the Ciprianis are once again in legal trouble. This time Giuseppe Cipriani's company is being sued by the security guards who staff the celeb-heavy events they host for not paying overtime. [NY Post]

Former dotcom analyst Henry Blodget, who now oversees the tech blog Silicon Alley Insider, is used to legal messes. (He was barred for life from working in the securities industry, as you may recall.) Well, he has another case on his hands today! After the site posted a confidential YouTube document, Google fired off a scary letter. SAI later posted the legal threat, which it later removed, although Blodget's original post with the contract still stands. [Valleywag]

A very tanned and very inarticulate Marc Jacobs talks about Interview and Andy Warhol with the magazine's owner Peter Brant, Brant's wife Stephanie Seymour, and co-editorial director Glenn O'Brien, on the Charlie Rose Show. A botoxy-looking Seymour, who sounds like she's taken a handful of benzos, opines that Warhol was "biblical."

The Observer's Max Abelson sits down with high-rolling, art-guzzling real estate plutocrat Aby Rosen, who makes no bones about the extravagant lifestyle he shares with his socialite wife Samantha Boardman Rosen, their two babies, and Rosen's two kids from his first marriage. Hey, did you know you can buy caviar by the wheelbarrow?

Some were a little confused last week when longtime enemies Victoria Beckham and Naomi Campbell—who've been feuding ever since Naomi asked a reporter why people call her "posh" eight years ago—were photographed together at the CFDA awards. Today, the answer: The two are partnering up to "design" a pair of jeans called the Naomi, which will be part of Victoria's (struggling) dVb denim line, proving once again that even mortal enemies can come together when cash is involved. [Mirror]

Contrary to earlier reports, Julia Restoin Roitfeld—who just photographed her younger brother Vladimir for a Rock & Republic campaign—will not be involved in her boyfriend Magnus Berger's magazine venture. Contributors to The Last, whose first issue is planned for September, will however include Genevieve Jones' main gay Derek Blasberg, model Tenzin Wild, and Brazilian photographer Marcelo Krasilcic. "Maybe one day I will contribute," said Julia in an interview, "and I'd love to, but right now I am involved in this project the same way a president's wife supports her husband!" What a sweetly inappropriate analogy.

One person you do not want to be right now is disgraced hedge funder Samuel Israel III. Because if you were him you'd either be a) lifelessly floating along the banks of the Hudson River; or b) the subject of one of the most high-profile manhunts in white-collar criminal history. Or both! Israel, the Bayou Group hedge fund founder who was found guilty of conning investors out of millions of dollars, was scheduled to begin serving a 20-year prison sentence on Monday; just an hour before he was scheduled to show, his car was found on the Bear Mountain Bridge with the words "Suicide is Painless" drawn in dust on its hood. But no body has turned up. And it turns out that people tend not to believe you when you spend your entire career defrauding people.

Mayoral aspirant and Queens Congressman Anthony Weiner is pushing a bill that would provide 1,000 extra visas a year. To models. Could Weiner be hoping for a little action from these hotties of foreign extraction? He already has a serious girlfriend! If nothing else, it can't hurt his chances of locking up a Bill Clinton endorsement in 2009. [NY Post]

WBLS hip-hop shock-jock Wendy Williams may wear some whack weaves, but don't hate on them on-air—her husband might have you killed for it. A lawsuit filed Wednesday accuses the ghetto-fab DJ's husband, Kevin Hunter, of trying to carry out a hit on Hot97's Tarsha Jones, who made the almost fatal mistake of talking smack about his wife on her show "Miss Jones in the Morning." The allegation was included in a sexual harassment suit filed by Nicole Williams, a booker for Williams' show, who claims that her boss' hubby repeatedly demanded sex from her, called her a variety of slurs, and also beat up Williams on numerous occasions. (Hunter also has the distinction of having what may be the least attractive sex tape in the history of the Net.) Of course, the fiesty Williams has long had temper management issues. It was a 1998 tussle with Angie Martinez that cost her a job at Hot97.

There's less than one week left until Ikea Red Hook's June 18th opening, and the store couldn't be opening at a better time, really. Between the sweltering summer heat (free air conditioning!) and rising grocery bills ($4.99 Swedish meatballs!), you could basically spend an entire cheapo day lounging in Ikea's living room sets and napping on Ikea's beds, just like you'd do at home. Or you could be like two guys in California and take it one step further by throwing an actual dinner party in the store. The practical jokers organized an entire semi-formal dinner party at a Sacramento Ikea store, complete with invitations, a sit down meal, wine and coffee, board games, and after-dinner drinks in the outdoor garden when the store closed at 9. It was a dinner party with no cleanup required. They tossed out the wine glasses afterward (which they'd purchased downstairs before the party) and headed home—and Ikea employees didn't seem to mind one bit. A party at the new Brooklyn outpost has even more potential: It will stay open until 10, leaving you an extra hour for Boggle. Video from the stunt after the jump.

Yankees outfielder Hideki Matsui is turning 34 today and in honor of the momentous occasion, Go Go Curry is giving away three free soup toppings (pickled relish! pickled shallots!) all day long. Also celebrating today: Victoria's Secret model Adriana Lima is turning 27. Marv Albert is 67. Deputy mayor Kevin Sheekey turns 42. High-end real estate agent Michele Kleier is 65. And Hunter College president Jennifer Raab turns 52.

Park Avenue doormen usually hit mini-jackpots come Christmas time, but now 1021 Park doorman Richie Randazzo has gone and won the real thing—the "Set for Life" scratch ticket he picked up last month landed him a $5 million payday. So what does he want to do with the money? He says he now wants to move into the tony building where he's been hailing cabs, holding packages, and, yes, opening the door for residents for years. Now "I'll have the doorman open the door for me."

The Sex and the City movie, Audrey Tautou's role as a high-class hooker in Priceless, seminars on "marrying rich," even Laura Mercier's new "Gold Digger" cosmetics line, all point to the fact that feminism may as well never have happened, says a Guardian writer. Yes, marrying rich is again a socially acceptable aspiration. Good thing no one told her about this guy. [Guardian]