Police arrived at actor/F-18 jet Charlie Sheen's house on Tuesday night and removed his twin boys from his custody, following allegations that he threatened his ex-wife Brooke Mueller on several occasions. (Mueller had obtained a restraining order against Sheen earlier in the day; she alleges that he threatened to "stab [her] eye with a pen knife" and, at another time, "cut [her] head off, put it in a box, and send it to [her] mom.")

Meet Twitter's newest verified user: @CharlieSheen, which is gaining followers at a rate of approximately 500/second, without having fired off a single tweet. Some 34,000 people and counting(!) are now following Sheen. But what will his first tweet be? Predict in the comments. [Image of Sheen via Getty]

If CBS hadn't pulled the plug on Two and a Half Men, Charlie Sheen would have taped an episode in which he spends a night partying (and possibly hooking up) with a gay dude. Not as strange as reality!

Christina Aguilera and her boyfriend got sloshed, then arrested, last night. An actress names her children "Ptolemy" and "Winter." Leonardo DiCaprio trades "tender" kisses with a man. Tuesday gossip spent the night in a drunk tank.

Having a show at 11 has its privileges. In this case, its good in the even that Charlie Sheen says a bunch of random stuff on television and everybody is waiting for people to professionally make fun of him.

Tonight, Charlie Sheen stopped by Piers Morgan Tonight for a surprise—live!—interview. And while the entire thing was not to be missed, certain quotes of Sheen's stood out more than the others—here's a compilation of the best ones.

After making the rounds on the morning show circuit with stops at The Today Show and GMA, Charlie Sheen sat down for a live poolside chat with TMZ where he continued to rant and rave about simultaneously winning and destroying everything in his path.

Completely powerless to keep his client from rambling on radio shows, Good Morning America, and TMZ, Charlie Sheen's publicist Stan Rosenfield quit. We gotta hand it to him, he survived a long time in the worst job in the world.

This morning the ladies of The View had admitted "friend" of Charlie Sheen and radio personality Alex Jones to discuss his mental sanity. Alex only wanted to plug himself and as you could imagine things didn't turn out well.

Did James Franco enact the most satisfying zit-popping known to man after the Oscars? Rob Pattinson and Kristen Stewart make out on a dance floor. Bieber and Selena Gomez make love with their hands. Melissa Leo rather regrets dropping an f-bomb. Monday gossip is an Oscars hangover.

The Today Show began airing the first of its Charlie Sheen interviews today, and he did not disappoint. Aside from candidly slamming CBS, he brags that he cured alcoholism by closing his eyes and making it so. It's so simple!

Charlie Sheen's recent radio meltdown gets mashed with classic rants courtesy of Christian Bale and Mel Gibson. And just to up the crazy ante, Alec Baldwin and Gary Busey drop in later.

All poem-fingered F-18 fighter jet Charlie Sheen wants to do is live a quiet life as a television star and porn family patriarch. So why does CBS make it hard for him by stopping production on his show? Sheen will be deploying his ordinance to the ground and making his case ("I may be a dangerous, self-destructive drug addict, but I show up to work!") on not one, but two different morning shows on Monday: Good Morning America and Today.

Charlie Sheen goes to extreme lengths to prove he's not on drugs. Natalie Portman wears a cheap dress. Lil Wayne gets searched. Inside Kelsey Grammer's emotional wedding. Sunday Gossip Roundup, coming up!

Charlie Sheen wants a big advance for his forthcoming tell-all book. David Beckham is actually Jesus, and he has a tattoo to prove it. Some Real Housewives kicked some ass in a bar fight. It's a greedy, seedy Saturday gossip.

In his soon-to-be-infamous interview with also-crazy talk show host Alex Jones, Charlie Sheen praises himself and attacks his boss with surprisingly sophisticated diction. I guess we just don't understand that he's "got magic and poetry in his fingertips."

Women begin to flee Charlie Sheen and CBS cancels his show, but he says they just "can't handle my power." Dianna Agron's "psycho" ex-boyfriend's house catches fire. Christina Aguilera gets drunk and bangs her boyfriend in the bathroom at a family get-together. TGIFriday gossip.

Charlie Sheen gave a ranty interview today to conservative radio host Alex Jones while he vacationed in the Bahamas. In less than 20 minutes, Sheen claimed he cured his alcoholism "with my mind," referred to his porn star lovers as his "goddesses," called out his imagined opponents—"fools and trolls"— in macho-baroque soliloquies, and insulted Two and a Half Men creator Chuck Lorre in anti-Semitic fashion: "I violently hate Chaim Levine (Chuck Lorre). He's a stupid, stupid little man and a pussy punk that I'd never want to be like."

Charlie Sheen goes on a "private adult vacation" with a porn star, a stoner sex kitten, and his ex. Lindsay Lohan considers a plea deal requiring six months of jail time. Hugh Hefner sets a date for his wedding to a 24-year-old. Thursday gossip harshes the mellow.

"Terrified" Dianna Agron flees ex-boyfriend and co-star Alex Pettyfer. Lindsay Lohan heads back to court. Eva Mendes naked pictures stolen! Charlie Sheen parties with porn stars on a yacht. Come and get your Wednesday gossip.