Breaking news out of Scarsdale, N.Y.: DJ Funkmaster Flex is trapped inside a women’s room stall—it was the only bathroom they had the key for—and a group of four women just walked in as he was trying to take a shit.

The news broke in time for South Floridians to read it on their phones while stopped for a frigging accident on the frigging Golden Glades just a couple frigging blocks from work. Marco Rubio, their senator and beige Buick-steering soulmate, is as shitty a driver as them. His wife is even worse:

A Polish news crew reporting live from outside an apartment complex in the north-eastern city of Łomża unwittingly captured some breaking news as their cameras inadvertently recorded a crime in progress.

At least four people are dead after a man reportedly went on a 25-minute shooting spree this morning in and around the Southern California cities of Tustin and Villa Park.

Multiple people have reportedly been shot inside an office complex in Phoenix just hours after former Arizona congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords appeared before the Senate Judiciary Committee to deliver a statement on the need for more gun control.

UPDATE 3:55 p.m. EST: Kern County Sheriff Donny Youngblood confirmed in a news conference that the injured student, a 16 year old, is in critical but stable condition. The shooter was talked down by a teacher and school administrator. The shooter apparently had "numerous" rounds in a pocket.

As many as 50 people were injured, including at least one critically, after a commuter ferry crashed into Pier 11 just south of Wall Street during rush hour this morning.

The 23-year-old woman who was savagely gang-raped by a group of men aboard a bus in South Delhi died early Saturday morning at a hospital in Singapore.

Which is to say, here's how everyone dealt with all the confusing information surrounding the Sandy Hook shooting this afternoon. There were tentative reports, and then confirmed reports, which were then supplanted by new reports, and the details are only beginning to fall into place now. We do know, however, that there was a shooter and that they killed a lot of people with guns, which is more than enough information to start a discussion.

Here's what we know about the shooter: still very little. Although the shooter was initially identified as Ryan Lanza, the Connecticut State Police won't yet identify his identity because there continues to be an "active ongoing investigation" with "a lot of things we cannot confirm or discuss yet." The Post is reporting that the shooter was actually Adam Lanza, Ryan's brother.

The Hartford Courant is reporting police have responded to a shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut. Local police say they got a call around 9:40 this morning about a shooter in the school's main office.

The U.N. General Assembly has voted to grant Palestine "non-member observer state" status. The U.S. and Israel opposed.

Two Bangor, Maine, news anchors decided to tender their resignation live on the air during yesterday's 6 PM newscast, saying a written resignation would have likely prevented them from doing so.

Police in College Station, Texas, say several people have been shot after a gunman opened fire with automatic weapons from a house near Fidelity and Highland streets.

Reddit user "themurderator" posted a series of images of himself after he was wounded in last night's Dark Knight shootings in Aurora, Colorado.

Police have one suspect in custody after 12 people were shot and killed during a late-night showing of The Dark Knight Rises at an Aurora, Colo., movie theater early this morning.

Shellie Zimmerman, the wife of Trayvon Martin's killer George Zimmerman, was charged today with lying to a judge about her husband's finances at his bond hearing.

Fugitive porn star Luka Rocco Magnotta has been captured in Berlin following a week-long manhunt.

The scene in the East Village this afternoon looked a lot like this one, from The Wicker Man. Traffic was at a virtual standstill as police worked to contain the massive beehive in a tree at Bowery and First. At least a dozen people filmed alongside me, plenty of more snapped pictures and even more passersby inquired what the hell was going on to the bystanders. One woman thought the building was being robbed. There was little to no buzzing heard.

CBS News brought in a helicopter to get footage of these two poor little guys. How they got into the Bronx is anyone's guess, but it was a nice choice because the Brooklyn Target is always packed.