As details begin to unfold about the plane crash in Austin, CNN's Marylynn Ryan tries to explain the course of events to Anchorman Tony Harris. Accomplished newsman that he is, Harris only needs three detailed explanations to grasp the situation.

The World Health Organization just raised its pandemic alert to 5, its second-highest level, an indication that the outbreak of swine flu is "nearing widespread human infection." Enjoy your afternoon, folks. [CNN]

The Wall Street Journal is reporting that a Bernie Madoff plea deal may be in the works. Prosecutors filed a notice this morning that they will file a new criminal information against him if he decides to waive indictment. "Often, new criminal informations are filed in connection with a plea deal, but not always." [WSJ]

Good news! The FAA says all 155 people aboard the US Airways jet that crashed in the Hudson River have survived. [NYDN, NYT]

A US Airways flight carrying 148 people went down in the Hudson River about an hour ago, reportedly after flying into a flock of birds. News reports indicate many passengers may still be in the water, so if you've been complaining about how cold you are today, you should probably shut up now. [NYT, CNN]

The victims of the Fox News bedbug infestation are fighting back! Former Fox employee Joan Clark has filed a lawsuit claiming that she has post-traumatic stress disorder from being attacked by bedbugs multiple times at the Fox News headquarters. She says she was bitten by the voracious creatures last October, last November, and just last month. She even claims that her entire department was relocated in a futile attempt to escape the bloodsucking insects! The building owner and maintenance company are named in the lawsuit, and Clark has filed a Worker's Comp claim against News Corp. itself. The full press release detailing her suit is below. We've contacted Fox (which may already be planning its revenge) and Clark's lawyer's for further info. THIS STORY IS FAR FROM OVER.

At ten minutes to 5pm here in New York, only a few news crews had reached the scene of the loft building at 421 Broome Street, where Heath Ledger was just found dead. Just a handful of passersby were gawking at the small police presence guarding his door. But by 5, a pack of 15 paparazzi had arrived, acting far calmer than the usual frenzied pap scene, respectfully obeying the NYPD's orders to stay back. Almost everyone there, reporters both on-air and from various print outlets, collectively believed that the actor committed suicide using sleeping pills; a bottle of prescribed sedatives were allegedly found next to his bed.

BREAKING: Conrad Black has been sentenced by a Chicago court to 6 and a half years in prison for defrauding shareholders and pocketing millions of dollars. [AP]

We have been fools to watch boring MSNBC for updates on the Clinton New Hampshire hostage crisis. Seriously. Turning the channel to Fox right now. [HuffPo]

ABC7, our favorite source for ridiculously overblown breaking stories, actually did wait until The View ended today before reporting that MANHOLE FIRES had KNOCKED OUT POWER in Greenwich Village, INCLUDING NYU. Which means like one law school dorm and a bodega on 3rd Street. PANIC! Is it terrorism? Sabotage from underpaid Indian foundry workers? Too soon to know but we say YES!

Today Channel 7 interrupted "The View" with promises of an awesome plane crash televised live but all we got were a couple sparks followed by the Cremaster-inspired covering of the plane in a thick layer of suggestive foam. Then they back to the tail end of a Steve Martin anecdote and a commercial. If you're gonna interrupt the ladies of "The View," we demand explosions!

Plane makes successful 'belly landing' in New Jersey [ABC7]

"We find it's always better to fire people on a Friday. Studies have statistically shown that there's less chance of an incident if you do it at the end of the week." The San Jose Mercury News must have learned from the bosses in Office Space. Mercury News's HR head says in the e-mail quoted below that the paper will lay off 101 workers by December 19.