• Scarlett Johansson may have sent crushy emails to Barack Obama, but that doesn't mean she can't defend Hillary Clinton against sexist political pundits in the racist media. [Star]

Believe us, there were plenty of signs around the office today keeping it real about the country's current financial situation. But pound-for-pound, little else has brought it home quite the way Arnold Schwarzenegger has, with the governor actually sending a letter yesterday to Treasury Secretary Hank Paulson asking for $7 billion to cover California's "short-term expenses." In other words, the man who built his political career on the backs of unkillable icons from the Terminator to Conan to Mr. Freeze the freaking Running Man is pacing the halls of the Capitol wondering how he'll pay almost 300,000 teachers:

As a born Californio who proudly packs my "U.S. out of California" tee from Mule Design whenever I leave the state, it comes as no surprise that Cebit conference organizers have, for the first time, selected a state instead of a nation as a partner in the world's largest information technology conference and trade show. Like many Americans, I could use a few euros and some free healthcare right about now. Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger dropped by Intel yesterday to promote the relationship with his deutsche sprechen comrades. And while the conference is held in Hanover, I recommend stopping by Berlin, which I hear is cheap, kinky and open for business. The state and conference are even offering financial assistance for first-time attendees. California uber alles, indeed.

A new law effective January 1st slaps a $20 fine on the first offense of reading, typing or sending text messages from behind the wheel. Repeat violators will get a $50 fine. The governor's quote: "Banning electronic text messaging while driving will keep drivers' hands on the wheel and their eyes on the road, making our roadways a safer place for all Californians." I know, it's not as good as "Get out." No word if the law covers light rail conductors. (Photo by Señor Codo)

California's most overdue budget ever — nearly a quarter late, and totalling $144.5 billion — has been signed by governor Arnold Schwarzenegger. As part of the plan, the state will ask voters to approve a measure that will allow California to borrow US$10B — yes ten billion dollars — from future state lottery revenue to prop up the next two budgets. (Photo by AP/Steve Yeater)

Not content to be upstaged by a toilet-transforming usurper, Arnold Schwarzenegger recently hit up the set of Terminator: Salvation (above), sparking rumors that director McG will employ an unorthodox method to get the California governor's face into the movie. According to a tipster for Latino Review, the special FX-filled plan would require little of Schwarzenegger's time and give him a kickin' new body in return:

• Madonna gave a 30-minute speech at her 50th birthday party. And frankly she was kind of sad that mainly nobodies showed up and not her celebrity friends. Also, the singer may not be able to get the Malawian "orphan" of her choosing. Madonna consoled herself by going to a strip club.

California's state legislators are tired of cyberbullying. Of their constituents' children, that is, not them. A bill that will suspend, or even expel, students from school for bullying online or via text message is now awaiting approval by the State Assembly. After that, it will need the Governator's signature. The bill is reminiscent of Kentucky's proposal to ban anonymous comments. No one likes a bully, but we're kind of hoping Schwarzenegger declares this bill too girly-man to be made into law. [News.com]

Last week — it's amazing how many tech workers missed it — California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger "terminated" (sigh) 10,000 state employees and cut another 200,000 to the state minimum wage of $6.55 an hour. Democratic state controller John Chiang (Schwarzenegger is a Republican, despite his marriage into the Kennedy family) told the Sacramento Bee that it would take at least six months to reconfigure the state's payroll system to issue blanket checks at minimum wage. The state had hired retired Cobol experts to work part-time on the system. Schwarzenegger fired them last week. Entrepreneurs, start your engines — I smell opportunity! (Cobol code from SimoTime Enterprises)

Busy accepting Bollywood paychecks, offering tank rides to children, and occasionally running the state of Colly-fornia, Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger has somehow carved time into his schedule to screen footage from the upcoming, unessential McG sequel Terminator: Salvation, starring Christian Bale as John Connor (and virtual unknown Sam Worthington as an amnesiac maybe-Terminator). So, does he give the new film a molten steel-dipped "thumbs up"? According to the LAT, not so much:

If there's one class of people that consistently draws the ire of the Republican party, it's celebrities. Perhaps mindful of the fact that all the cool kids in Hollywood vote Democrat, the GOP is forever on the attack against celebrities, their political views, and all they represent, and John McCain's attention-getting "Celebrity" ad is just the latest example. Yessir, there's nothing the Republican party hates more than celebrities.

Here's a special bonus for conspiracy theorists: Vince Sollitto, Cuil's PR chief, previously worked as a Republican political operative and spokesman for California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger. Google executives, as one would expect for a bunch of Bay Area liberals, have donated heavily to Democratic candidates and causes. Cuil is backed by Wal-Mart family money. See a pattern?

San Francisco mayor Gavin Newsom is running for higher office again, so it was time for another wedding. The latest bride is actress Jennifer Siebel. Larry Page and Sergey Brin were happy to lend the Google party plane to ferry guests from the Bay Area, so apparently no hard feelings about that whole San Francisco-wide Wi-Fi thing.

Joining Verizon, Time Warner Cable, and Sprint in press-releasing their concerns about child porn online, AOL and and AT&T announced today that they, too, will block their Internet service customers' access to Usenet newsgroups and websites suspected of hosting such illegal content. New York attorney general Andrew Cuomo engineered this arrangement, and California attorney general Jerry Brown and Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger (pictured here saving the children) are hot for a similar deal in-state.

Arnold Schwarzenegger dropped by a Tesla Motors workshop today to announce a tax-break deal. The exemption wooed Tesla execs to move a planned manufacturing facility for the proposed Tesla all-electric family sedan back to California from New Mexico. The Governator said it was further proof that you could be pro-business and pro-environment — not to mention anti-tax. A noted Hummer enthusiast, the former movie star's environmental record isn't exactly stellar.

Following last week's surprise announcement that India's Reliance ADA Group would sink a half-billion into DreamWorks, the lines dividing Hollywood and Bollywood continue to blur: Today comes news that national action-hero treasures Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger have carved some time out of their busy franchise-rebooting / incomprehensible-speechifying schedules to sign on for the most epic Bollywood production of all time. And it's all going down right on the Universal lot, a stone's throw from Steven Spielberg's DreamWorks offices:

Obviously the forthcoming book Hollywood Babylon: It's Back is going to be the must-have ironic hipster book of the season, what with its collection of full-frontal shots of male celebrities like, allegedly, Mick Jagger, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Ewan McGregor and, terrifyingly, John Malkovich. But in case you can't afford, or bring yourself, to buy the cock gawker for your coffee table, here are the Cliff's Notes:

A coterie of B-list celebritards including Jenny McCarthy and Darryl Hannah, as well as California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger, showed up to an opening party for the new Tesla Motors dealership on Santa Monica Boulevard in Westwood last week. Why LA and not the Valley? "Because it's Hollywood and glamorous, this is the flagship store," Tesla client services manager Jeremy Snyder told the AP. The next dealership will be built in San Carlos, home of Tesla Motors. The $2 million showroom is based on an Apple retail outlet, according to CEO Elon Musk. While the 400-strong waiting list, including the Governator, means you can't actually drive away in a new Tesla roadster until 2009 at the earliest, you can at least ogle the floor models and maybe convince one of the Tesla employees on hand to let you take one for a test drive. Better you behind the wheel than Musk — his driving record's not so clean. (Photo by AP/Mark J. Terrill)

• Rob Lowe sued two former nannies and a former chef after saying one nanny tried to extort $1.5 million from him. The nanny basically accused the movie and TV star of hitting on her, while Lowe denied it and said the nanny was stalky. The second nanny supposedly plotted to spread lies of some sort about Lowe and his wife. The chef allegedly stole drugs from the medicine cabinet and had sex in Lowe's bed. You know, there may be a remote possibility that Lowe is a poor judge of character. [People]

A California state ballot item planned for November would secure $10 billion in bonds to begin building a high-speed rail system by 2009, with a 20-year estimated building schedule and a total price tag of $40 billion, all of it in publicly traded bonds more stable than, say, subprime mortgages. Millions have already been spent on planning — and influencing lawmakers with trips to visit Japan's shinkansen. But Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger has helped derail two previous efforts to let California voters make the decision, even though 58 percent of voters statewide support the idea. A new public-private partnership amenable to the Governator's self-interest might finally break the ice. Why should the Valley care? Here are four reasons.