What is lion-maned billionaire gadabout Richard Branson (pictured) up to this week? No, not his plans to dive to the bottom of the deepest sea. That was two whole weeks ago. This week, he's announced plans to populate his wholly-owned Caribbean island with lemurs. He's also auctioning off the right to shave his legs. And looking for spaceship pilots.
The Taco Bell lawsuit that caused a nation to stare down at the half-eaten Gorditas in their hands and question the true nature of the oily, meat-like substance that filled them has been withdrawn.
House Speaker John Boehner has a message for Mexicans: Drop dead. No, we're sure he loves the Mexicans. But not enough to throw them, and Americans of Mexican heritage, a Capitol Hill party for Cinco de Mayo.
President Obama pledged not to attach any signing statements, or little notes saying you'll ignore certain legislative language on constitutional grounds, to new laws back when he was a candidate. He broke that pledge in about two seconds. And in his latest signing statement — appended to the just-passed budget deal to fund the government through September — Obama announced that he's just going to ignore that bit of legislative language defunding his "czars," a terribly Russian term for "advisers."
Democrats in Texas seem to be excited about this: They've convinced retired Lt. Gen. Ricardo Sanchez, commander of U.S. forces in Iraq during the Abu Ghraib torture scandal, to run for the U.S. Senate seat being vacated by Kay Bailey Hutchison. Sanchez described himself to McClatchy over the phone, saying, "I decided that socially, I'm a progressive, a fiscal conservative and a strong supporter, obviously, of national defense." He added that, "America has a responsibility to its people."
Remember a couple of months ago when an outbreak of Legionnaire's disease (Legionellosis) sickened over a hundred guests at the Playboy Mansion? L.A. County public health officials have traced the sometimes deadly disease to a "whirlpool spa," according to The Los Angeles Times. Makes sense, because Legionnaire's is "transmitted from contaminated aerosols generated in hot tubs if the disinfection and maintenance program is not done rigorously." Gross.
Rick Santorum is backing away from the campaign slogan featured on the website for his exploratory committee, "Fighting to Make America America again," after it was pointed out to him that it was first made famous in a pro-union poem by the gay poet Langston Hughes.
The House of Representatives passed Paul Ryan's Path to Prosperity budget this afternoon. It will die in the Senate, of course, but now it goes on record as the House Republicans' official fiscal plan for the future.
Rep. Ron Paul and his son, Sen. Rand Paul, are popular members of the Tea Party movement to slash every government entitlement and regulation ever, for the sake of Liberty. Both are considering runs for president, and at least one — Daddy, probably — is likely to enter the race. Is there anything not to like about the Paul family of doctor-libertarians? Don't answer that question until you hear about the latest prize in this stable, Robert Paul, who is considering a run for the Senate himself.
Sneaky CBS Radio News reporter Mark Knoller listened in to a private chat between the president and elite donors following a Chicago fundraiser last night. The president had no idea that this reporter could still hear the feed! Naughty Mark Knoller. Anyway, what's the dirt?
Our old pal Donald Trump is back in the news. His presidential publicity stunt to win ratings for the Celebrity Apprentice is moving along quite nicely, according to the hot new poll. Trump leads runner-up Mike Huckabee in GOP presidential pack by... let's see here... nine points. What the hell?
The man officially recognized as the oldest man in the world, Walter Breuning, died yesterday in Montana of natural causes. He was 114 years old. Breuning lived by a simple set rules, according to the AP, which included eating two meals a day, because "That's all you need." He also had thoughts on death: "We're going to die. Some people are scared of dying. Never be afraid to die. Because you're born to die." Breuning was born in Minnesota in 1896 and worked most of his life on the railroad in Montana.
This delightful nugget about an early Sarah Palin encounter with her possible presidential rival's ex-wife comes from the April 3, 1993 edition of the Anchorage Daily News:
America's festering cauldron of endless misery and abandoned housing tracts, Arizona, is back in the national political news. Don't click away yet! The state is merely trying to ensure that certain biracial Kenyan-Indonesian presidential candidates aren't hiding their shameful biracial Kenyan-Indonesian births when they run for office, okay? So let's take a look at the Donald Trump-endorsed "Arizona Birther Bill," which passed the state Senate yesterday.
Fox News' "America's Election HQ" website published one of those "wacky coincidence" stories yesterday that will make you want to take a cold shower or seven after reading: A student at George Washington University committed suicide yesterday, just as President Obama was giving his major deficit-reduction speech at another campus building. Not that there was anything linking the events, but apparently it was enough of a nutty coincidence for Fox News to make note of it as important political news. Ick.
