Who is this tiny reptilian hero? This real-world Bubble Bobbler? According to owner Nick DeBakey, her name is Laura.

Well, oh, shit: a live animal was just put through an x-ray scanner at LAX.

On Sunday, an Alaska house cat had a clear message for a nosy black bear, telling the interloper (in the universal language of clawing), “Hey, big guy, get lost!”

Wow, that sure is a lot of goats. Like just an unbelievable number of goats right there.

Imagine it’s Saturday morning, and you’re about to enjoy a book and a cup of coffee on your back porch, and you’re greeted by four two-foot tall winged eaters of dead meat. They’re staring you down through the glass sliding door, as if to say Do you feel lucky, punk? Oh god, not the vultures again. Welcome to Rick Mize’s world.

Check out this guy.

Police in North Charleston, S.C., have arrested the man they believe wrapped electrical tape around the muzzle of Caitlyn the dog, a chocolate Staffordshire, and left her for several days with her tongue stuck between her teeth, unable to eat or drink.

According to Phys.org, researchers have discovered two new species of antechinus, a marsupial whose breeding period is characterized by weeks of frenzied, 14-hour fuckfests until the males get so stressed out they literally die.

Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the chillest deer of them all? Chill deer.

An Irish bull whose homosexuality was the subject of international news coverage last year has recently shown interest in the opposite sex, the BBC reports.

Today, Russia celebrated the 70th anniversary of Nazi Germany’s defeat with the nation’s biggest Victory Day parade since the collapse of the Soviet Union. Much more importantly, however, a Russian circus observed the holiday by dressing up two Baikal seals as Soviet-era soldiers, giving us this wonderful, wonderful video.

A band of wild animals are apparently on the loose, prowling through a small town in Oklahoma after they were sprung from their enclosures by a tornado that hit the exotic animal park Wednesday.

Herbivores—animals too weak to even kill and eat another, weaker animal—may be in for an “enormous” die-off soon. I suppose this is our fault, also?

Offering another clear example of why we can't have nice (probably unethical) things, the mother of a two-year-old who fell into a zoo's cheetah enclosure yesterday is accused of dangling the boy over the exhibit beforehand.

A San Diego-area sea lion lived out the worst nightmare of ocean-dwelling teens everywhere this week, when his first day at a new school ended in the back of a squad car, the NY Daily News reports.

"Maybe you think that you can hide/I can smell your scent from miles," singing competition badboy Adam Levine once said, but last night the hunter became the hunted.

Do you know what to do half a dozen puppies? This monkey clearly does not.

In this life, you flail blindly, pummeling your way from one day to the next through alternating periods of heroic effort and helpless inertia, unwilling or unable to behold the world beyond the lonely confines of your own ego. In this way, you resemble an idiot kangaroo with a watering can stuck on its head.

Salamanders: hell yeah, baby! You don't have to be the small guys on the playground anymore. When some stupid river fish swims over and calls you a pipsqueak, you can now invoke the holy memory of your forgotten ancestors—the recently discovered six-foot, toilet-seat-headed "super" salamanders. Who's the boss now?

The judge who presided over Robert Durst's Texas murder trial says the cable TV darling once cut the head off a cat and left it on her doorstep.