· American Gladiators alumnus Nitro — née Dan Clark — will share good, bad, ugly and 'roidally deranged tales from the old days while reading his new biography at Book Soup.

The Berlin Film Festival continued Sunday with critics' first look at Rage, the fashion-world mystery featuring Jude Law's revolutionary turn as a model. Just, you know, a female one.

Lord knows that NBC head Ben Silverman hardly needs another reason to fire another VP, but at least this one's creative: someone's hiring hookers on the corporate card!

ABC unveiled the cast of Dancing with the Stars last night, and in a flight of artsy-fartsy-fancy, we've paired them with a choreographer from history we think could best serve them throughout the competition.

New York Fashion Week begins Thursday but we're getting the jump on it tonight. First up: The ageless icon Karl Lagerfeld. Maybe you can't afford his clothing, but you can probably achieve his hairstyle.

[A snowboarder flips through the air at East River Park today, as part of Winter Jam NYC; image via Getty]

Disney and DreamWorks today sent out official confirmation of their shotgun wedding, issuing a release around town raising more questions about its relationship than it answers.

Questions are continuing to pile up in the Chris Brown/Rihanna dispute, including debate over whether there was a deadly weapon involved and speculation that a second felony charge could be coming down the pike.

Computer illiterate masturbators of the world, take heed: your 2009 Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue cover girl is Leonardo DiCaprio's girlfriend Bar Refaeli. Allegedly.

Many people watched the first couple episodes of Big Love and decided it wasn't for them. But, based especially on the third season's first four episodes, those folks should rent the DVDs and play catch-up.

Jerry Springer's unlikely Talent heir: Nick Cannon? [The Live Feed]

• Domenico Dolce and Stefano Gabanna are playing priests in Rob Marshall's new movie, Nine. Yes, that's right, priests. [WWD]
• McDonald's is the official coffee of Fashion Week. Yes, that's right, McDonald's. Free espresso all week, folks! [AdAge]
• Did Saks screw up retail forever when it slashed prices last November? Possibly. [WSJ]
• Istithmar says it has no plans to sell Barneys. [NYT]
• Vera Wang plans to branch out to footwear this spring. [WWD]
• Henry Holland's Grammy dress for MIA earned him tons of attention last night; he's now gearing up for London Fashion Week. [Telegraph, Independent]
• Jason Wu talks about what he has planned for Fashion Week. [NYDN]
• Alexander Wang is introducing limited-edition condoms. They'll be sold at Thompson Hotels and the proceeds go to Planned Parenthood. [NYM]

Quiz: Some people you knew back in your hometown send you friend requests on Facebook. You don't really like them. Do you A) accept requests, B) deny requests, C) have an existential crisis?

Peaches Geldof's great New York experiment has ended in shambles. She's divorcing her American Green Card-securing hubby, is rumored to be shacking up with a new fellow, and is maybe moving back to London.

The Republicans have finally found their voice: it's the voice of a 50-year-old using hiphop slang from the end of the '90s.

We hear Yahoo is in talks to buy Tumblr, a blogging startup run by 22-year-old David Karp for "low-to-mid eight figures" — which would translate to a small fortune for the New York entrepreneur.

Looking for that elusive, one-of-a-kind resource to help you attain Ben Lyons's dizzying heights of film literacy? Oh. Well, he's revealed his secret anyway.

Let's count Obama poster-boy Shepard Fairey's current skirmishes: he's preemptively sued the AP over its copyright claims; he pleaded not guilty to Boston graffiti charges; and hipster literary journal N+1 thinks he's a sell-out.

Animal rights activists have been trying to ban horse-drawn carriages in Central Park for several months now. (For some reason, they think the practice amounts to animal cruelty.) But now they've come up with an alternative: They're proposing that the city replace the horse-drawn buggies with replica of Model Ts. Tourists visiting from Iowa will still get to feel like they're stepping back in time, and because the vehicles will be powered by electricity, it'll be entirely eco-friendly, too! Aside from the grim aesthetic implications—"the sound of clopping hooves is one of the only aural pleasures available on the edge of the oasis that is Central Park," Michael Gross points out today—and the fact the proposal would put hundreds of carriage drivers out of work, PETA has managed to line up support from attention-loving City Councilmember Daniel Garodnick, who now says he plans to put the matter before the City Council this spring.

Congress stepped in to ensure your bubby's old Hitachi still receives snowy episodes of All My Children, but you have been given a similar window of opportunity to rethink your life and poor eating habits.