• HarperCollins is launching a new imprint which will focus on "pop culture, sports, style and content derived from the Internet." Clever! [NYT]
• Sony Pictures is cutting 300 employees, or 4% of its workforce. [LAT]
• YouTube and Universal are in talks to build a "hub" for music videos. [WSJ]
• Jon Stewart went to town on CNBC last night, in case you missed it. [Portfolio]
• For some reason, NBC has decided to bring back Heroes next season. [THR]
• In the first two months of this year, 7,453 jobs were lost at media companies. You know, just in case you're keeping track or whatever. [THR]

The show that has entertained millions for so long has finally died, in this its eighth year. We mourn those who've been killed in this tragedy, and celebrate those who managed to escape it.

Julie Engel Manga, an executive coach, is so deeply concerned by Twitter that she wrote to the New York Times. At 194 words, her letter is way too long. Here it is in Twitter-compliant form:

At last, an answer to the age old question: What does a spectacularly surgically-enhanced, platinum blonde, post-op, forty-something tranny smell like? Steamed rice, mandarins, bergamot, orange flowers, strawberry, and cucumber, with just a dash of Cristal. Yes, Amanda Lepore the Fragrance has arrived, and can be yours for just $950. Naturally, it comes in a sparkly disco ball-shaped bottle, and even better, it's fermented, so will linger on and on. Yum!

[Submit your own Gawker Stalker sightings to stalker@gawker.com] March 5 @ 9 a.m. Kevin Bacon having breakfast at Good Enough to Eat. Does that mean I'm 1 degree away now?

Those stories coming out about Obama's barber saying how Obama's hair is already turning grey? Total ripoff of hero president Bill Clinton's own first term PR strategy:

Today in the news of the showbiz world, we have Meryl Streep as Brechtian hero. Steve Carell as fought-over divorce child. Tyler Perry as fool. And Shonda Rhimes as wicked devil creator.

It looks like 20 Pine Street and Rector Square aren't the only downtown apartment buildings facing lawsuits from frustrated, angry buyers. Steve An paid $820,000 for an apartment in mogul Lev Leviev's District condo building at 111 Fulton Street back in 2007. Maybe he isn't so impressed with how Amy Sacco's "exclusive lifestyle concept" has been turning out? An filed suit against Leviev's company on Tuesday, and is now demanding his $82,000 deposit back. You can look at the complaint for yourself below.

Permasmiley celebrity Columbia writing student James Franco is going to have a book of his short stories published by Scribner. This, strangely, is the least ridiculous book deal we've written about this week. [Fox]

Even if you've never stopped to think about what the fashion director of a store actually does—they're not buyers, or merchandisers, or window dressers, or marketing execs, but sprinkle their oracular wisdom (shoulder pads: back! Heels: high! Hems: flouncy!) over all of these domains—you may still be taken aback to learn that this civilizing breed of person is endangered, bordering on, dare we say it, obsolete. Both Michael Fink of Saks and LaVelle Olexa of Lord & Taylor have been let go, neither to be replaced, and their counterparts at other stores must be wondering what the future holds. But who, or what, is to blame for this sad state of affairs? It practically goes without saying that it's those twin destroyers of culture: blogs and reality TV!

Grandparents: they hate their grandkids nowadays! It's all detailed right there in a brand new breaking trend story from the New York Times, the Paper of Record. Nobody likes anybody any more!

Today we have a closeted jack-off (or something), a Scrooge-like celebrity woman, a call girl struggling actress, and the worst blind item ever written by humans. (Not monkeys, Delonas!)

Give Gordon Ramsay money now, prats! The John McCain of food continues to bring the awesome on cooking reality shows. But he is severely impaired when it comes to bringing the money, to banks.

Hope you didn't make the big mistake of taking Michael Bloomberg's investment advice yesterday! The mayor singled out three companies, telling reporters that General Electric, Macy's and Saks were all "irreplaceable brands" and were undervalued in the current market. But with the exception of GE, which is about where it started, both Macy's and Saks are down big today. Guess a career as an investment advisor probably isn't in the cards if his re-election campaign doesn't pan out this November.

Today we visit a bizarre parallel universe where Tom Cruise is president, Lindsay Lohan is showered with gifts and honors and Oscar-winner are expected to be humble.

• The massive penthouse at 895 Park that belonged to the late fashion tycoon and movie producer (Tootsie, Showgirls) Charles Evans has undergone its third price cut since it went on the market for $29.5 million in October 2007. The four-bedroom triplex, which was discounted to $25 million in May '08 and then lowered to $20 million in October, is now on the market for just $15.5 million. [Cityfile, Stribling]
• Matthew Bronfman has put his 9,000-square-foot mansion in Katonah, known as Treetops, up for rent. It's $28,500 a month, just so you know. [NYP]
• Gary and Charlotte DePersia, both senior vice presidents at the Corcoran Group, have sold their 5,000-square-foot, Celerie Kemble-designed home in Amagansett for $4 million. [Newsday]

Jeffrey Toobin, the married CNN legal reporter, could very soon have a child with his rumored mistress, if the woman's friends are correct.

So everyone knows that the art world's in the doldrums, that even deep-pocketed collectors are holding off buying, and that the only reason people even show up to art openings anymore is to quaff the free champagne. But you'd think that a seven foot-wide portrait of a smirking Bernie Madoff, priced at a mere $100,000, would have some takers, right? Strangely not: Disappointingly for the artist Yan Pei-Ming, his masterpiece, on sale at the Armory Show which kicked off yesterday at the West Side Piers, has so far attracted no interest.

After weeks of anticipation and confusion, the listing for Sting's duplex apartment at the Brentmore at 88 Central Park West has finally turned up online. The 6,600-square-foot spread, which is listed with Halstead's Mark Friedman, features five bedrooms, grand staircase, and no less than 23 closets. And it can be yours for just $19 million! Take a tour for yourself after the jump.

Eva Mendes turns 35 today. One of New York's richest men, oil billionaire David Koch, is 69. Supermodel-turned-TV host Niki Taylor is turning 34. Actor Kevin Connolly is 35. Former AOL exec and Huffington Post co-founder Kenny Lerer is 57. Sheila Birnbaum, Skadden's "Queen of Toxic Torts," is 69. Red Hot Chili Peppers guitarist John Frusciante turns 39. Publicity-seeking pastor Joel Osteen turns 46. And the more talkative member of Penn & Teller, Penn Jillette, is celebrating his 54th birthday.