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It's no secret that John McCain faces an uphill battle in his Senate Republican primary. It's also no secret that McCain strategically invited Sarah Palin to campaign along with him last weekend. Tonight, Jon Stewart mocked them both for it.

Balmain recently debuted a thousand-dollar shredded t-shirt, which got us thinking: How much money could you waste on a t-shirt, jeans, and a trash bag to schlep your empty wallet? Behold, the $15,500 homeless person outfit.

Ricky Gervais takes us on a magical journey through the world of animal homosexuality. I can't wait for you to find out how gay dolphins have sex.

Among the eight apocalyptic Christian militia members indicted for sedition are the married couple who led Michigan's Hutaree militia, David "Captain Hutaree" Stone and wife Tina—the blushing bride of Hutaree, who uploaded wedding photos to Facebook in December.

Jeremy Piven had an exhaustion relapse; Sarah Austin dreamed of a new ride; and Martha Stewart got a little overexcited. The Twitterati suffered collective mood swings.

It's that time again—time to put a wrench in the smoothness of your day and get all befuddled as you watch tonight's new episode of LOST. Luckily, you'll be in good company. Inside, your open thread for discussion.

All eyes are on ABC. If Jin and Sun are finally reunited on LOST I don't know what I'll do with myself. I'll laugh, I'll cry, I'll hug the TV. What are you looking forward to tonight, my #tvparty pals?

Hello! It's Tuesday! And that means it's time for this week's American Idol performance episode. Tonight, the Top 10 will sing live for your votes from 8:00 to 10:00 PM ET on FOX. Excited? More inside, plus your open thread.

[No one looked happy to see an increased counterterrorism presence on the New York City subway after terrorists threatened the Moscow subway system yesterday. Image via Splash]

TONIGHT: John Stamos rocks out alongside The Beach Boys on Dancing With the Stars, it's a Jin-and-Sun-centric Lost episode, Usher mentors on Idol, V returns with a new episode, Rumer Willis' same-sex kiss on 90210, and The Biggest Loser's teams are dissolved.

If Sketch Nation Shooter for iPhone is anywhere near as cool as it looks, we can all look forward to hours of butts and boobs shooting lasers at Justin Bieber's drunkenly-doodled face.

Today we were blessed with two Glenn Beck stories. His fans had their cars towed, and he revealed the title of his exciting new novel, The Overton Window. Here are today's best Beck-related comments from you terrible, godless progressives.

Family Research Council: Barack Obama "our 'first gay President'"

If there's anything that could improve upon the already legendary Telephone video, it's a healthy dose of Grover and the Yip Yips. Now all we need is Bert and Ernie superimposed into the Telephone vid...come on internet, make it happen!

Shocker: that schizophrenic person who Eric Cantor had arrested for threatening him had a concealed handgun permit. Once again, House Republican Whip Eric Cantor, we look forward to your legislative response to your newfound concern about easy gun availability.

First-quarter Nielsen ratings are out, and everyone is talking about CNN's (continued) primetime ratings free-fall. While Fox News remains No. 1, MSNBC and CNN's sister network HLN are now regularly outperforming The Coop and his cohorts.

Today's Tyra might as well have been called "A Mash Up of TyTy's Most Awesomest and Benevolent Makeovers," but one segment stood out as nothing short of amazing—where Whitney put the hurt on some fools for looking wack.

Ricky Gervais may appear on Curb, Martha Stewart's new TV network, Castle gets renewed, Demi Lovato drops by Grey's Anatomy, Ellen stars in a new comic book, and a movie's in the works based on the E-Trade talking babies. Really.

Is Hipster Grifter Kari Ferrell the type of person who'd write an essay about "the part where his cock was all stagnant in my butt after the mom assault?" The answer may surprise you! Probably not, though. [AnimalNY]