The first iPad reviews are in, and techies love it. NYT's David Carr has been tweeting lustily from his iPad all night—dirty, "sexy," in-the-bedroom, on-the-toilet, "far less monogamous" tweets. Watch him slide his finger down this touchscreen, baby.

Tonight, Stephen Colbert wagged his finger at ABC for its annoying countdown clock during last night's episode of LOST. But it's not all bad—he was riveted by the suspense.

Willow Palin and her high school buddies trashed a vacant house in Alaska. Now it appears residents of the Mat-Su Valley are pissed that Sarah Palin got Willow off the hook. Watch out, Sarah. The small town scene is brutal.

Tonight on The Daily Show, Jon Stewart took a few minutes to comment on how, immediately following the passage of the health care reform bill, President Obama's balls grew three sizes that day—and hilariously reviewed his post-victory actions.

If you've been on the Internet this week, you probably saw the (later revealed to be staged) video of some elementary school kids reenacting the climactic scene from Scarface. Tonight—coincidentally—South Park did it (and better). Video inside.

High Society is chock full of great life lessons for becoming a better person. On tonight's episode, Paul Johnson Calderon shows us how to be a true adult: when you get into trouble, call mom and get more money.

Jay Leno was on the HLN show hosted by Joy Behar's hair and earrings the other day, and she talked to him backstage. Turns out he thinks that both he and Conan O'Brien got "screwed." Here is the video!

Tonight's episode of Modern Family was half-sitcom and half-advertisement for the iPad. Yes, Phil Dunphy's a person just like you or me and he's psyched for it to come out. The release coincides with his birthday and he's super excited.

People keep asking us if we've seen this Times article about up-and-coming young bloggers. Yes, we are a young blogger, of course we have seen it. So what. Wait... you don't actually think we're jealous?

Chris Rock defends modern rap music in this hilarious bit from his 'Never Scared' stand up special.

James Toback is the creepy 65 year-old film director who recently approached a 24 year-old lady and promised to "make her a star", twice. Apparently, his cruising is not limited to the over-18 set. Here are a couple stories!

Megan McCarthy wondered why the New York Times hates West Coast gossips; Natalie Eshaya caught a cheater; and Julia Allison did not know what her students were thinking. The Twitterati were confused and dismayed.

There's a holiday on the horizon, which can only mean one thing: It's another holiday special, Charlie Brown! Also, I can't wait to see what Claire picks out for Phil on Modern Family and tear! Another Real World season ends.

The trailer for The Expendables (née My Big Fat 90's Action Movie) debuted today and features Stallone, Schwarzenegger, Willis and a panoply of other names you haven't heard since Demoliton Man was tearing up the box office.

[Michelle Obama helps a group of school children plant seeds in the White House Kitchen Garden today. Image via Getty]

Everyone who wants to get set up with a rich New Yorker on Bravo's Millionaire Matchmaker should apply here. Millionaires looking to be set up should apply here. And homosexual millionaires should apply here. Good luck!

Today we looked at crazy Bill Donohue: Child Rape Apologist. Naturally the topic sparked a lot of discussion, including one post from a commenter wondering about the really big picture of it all.

TONIGHT: The Real World D.C. wraps up its season, In Plain Sight's third season premieres, Ugly Betty invades London Fashion Week, Sheryl Crow continues her stint on Cougar Town, rebel monkeys, and it's Easter time, Charlie Brown.

Ellen had a great idea for a laugh at the expense of her assistant. It's Spring Break, so let's braid his leg hair! Oh! It hurts? But it's for the greater comedy good! Right? This poor guy actually whimpers!

When Rupert Murdoch commits his progeny to Christ, he doesn't fool around: Chloe and Grace, his daughters with third wife Wendi Deng, were recently baptized in the river Jordan, at the very spot Jesus is said to have been baptized.