[Even smart little boys like Christopher S. Rupprecht couldn't help making silly faces while he waited his turn at the Scripps National Spelling Bee competition in Washington D.C. yesterday. Image via Getty]

The Center for Disease Control has released the results of a survey about birth control and pregnancy given to almost 3,000 teens between the ages of 15 and 19. What did they find out?

President Obama has bailed on his Australia/Indonesia trip, thanks to the BP oil spill.

Whoa! Something just hit Jupiter! The impact—which must have been huge to be visible on earth—was recorded by two different amateur astronomers, one in Australia and one in the Philippines. Was it... an alien vessel?? (No.)

[A bird sails over the oil slick at East Grand Terre Island off the coast of Louisiana today. Photo via AP.]

Tonight, Jon Stewart used video footage to embarrass Glenn Beck for his assertion that Fox News was the only media outlet airing disturbing video of IDF soldiers being beaten by passengers on a Turkish flotilla (it wasn't). Video inside.

We don't like cops. But we really don't like vegans. So how to judge a Portland vegan cafe owner who threw out a cop because "he felt uncomfortable having a uniformed officer in the vegan cafe?" Uh... Vegans suck! [Mercury]

Every Washington pundit-type wants Obama to be more emotional about this damn oil spill. Most people want him to be angrier. Obama has told them he is "angry and frustrated," already. But they do not want him just to be angry. They need him to express that anger. CBS White House correspondent Chip Reid, when told by Press Secretary Robert Gibbs that Obama is mad, asked "Can you describe it? Does he yell and scream? What does he do?" Yeah, like, does he chase Rahm Emanuel around the West Wing with a decorative samurai sword? What does he do?

South Carolina Republican gubernatorial candidate Nikki Haley may or may not have had an affair with two dudes. Regardless, a South Carolina state senator said on a talk show that South Carolina doesn't need a "raghead" for a governor.

In his typical crude, redneck fashion, Ron White reminds us an important moral: don't base everything off of looks.

Here are some sad pictures of pelicans drenched in oil from Boston.com's The Big Picture.

A six-member crew was sealed in a tiny replica of a space ship for a simulated journey to Mars today at Moscow's Institute for Medical and Biological Problems. Man, 520 days away from the Internet sounds great right now.

[Failed Celebrity Apprentice contestant Rod Blagojevich was looking for a fight today when he arrived at court in Chicago to defend himself on corruption charges. Image via Getty]

Interested in joining us here at Gawker? We're currently looking to add two people to the team, and we're also seeking another intern to join us for the summer.

YourTango CEO Andrea Miller is married to an Indian man, and he's great. To help other white ladies meet "incredibly attractive brown people," "innately gracious, social creatures" who "love to dance," she wrote a guide for the Huffington Post.

Today we looked at how Bill O'Reilly is a tremendous fucking asshole, equating gay folks with terrorists when looking at that gay McDonald's ad. But one commenter pointed out what we all seemed to forget: We're talking about McDonald's.

Your daily look into the twitterific lives of our favorite celebs.

[Ke$ha does something, somewhere. Image via Splash]

Man calling 911 to report being punched is punched by second person while calling 911.

The ladies of The View spent a lot of time today discussing how President Obama should deal with the BP oil disaster...until they somehow got onto the topic of how the First Lady and POTUS deal with domestic disputes.