Kristin Cavallari designs her own line of peep toe booties and “classic” wedges, but Reebok also makes her smile.

Gawker alum Adrian Chen—now a staff writer at The New Yorker!—recently visited LaGuardia Airport’s Lot 7, where Uber drivers accustomed to picking up potential passengers are now organizing, fitfully, for better working conditions at the car-sharing behemoth.

Perhaps the question we should be asking of our candidates is not who would we most like to grab a beer with, but rather, who can blow the gnarliest o’s?

Since the beginning of her campaign last year, Hillary Clinton has steadfastly refused to disclose what exactly she said during the speeches she gave at several large banks, including three at Goldman Sachs, after her tenure as Secretary of State. Attendees of two of those Goldman speeches, both of which took place in October 2013, are now hinting at why Clinton has been so reticent. As one attendee explained to Ben White at Politico:

Last night, in front of thousands of people, Donald Trump stood on stage and called Ted Cruz a pussy. And while you are not supposed to say the word “pussy,” members of the media are especially not supposed to say the word “pussy.” So instead, they got creative.

When he decided to further his surreal feud with the Wu-Tang Clan by trolling Ghostface Killah, Martin Shkreli probably assumed he would have the upper hand in a battle of making dumb videos for the internet. But today, Ghostface released his response to Shkreli (I Love the 2010s!) and it turns out to be not dumb at all.

Hillary Clinton’s supporters often argue that mainstream political reporters are incapable of covering her positively—or even fairly. While it may be true that the political press doesn’t always write exactly what Clinton would like, emails recently obtained by Gawker offer a case study in how her prodigious and sophisticated press operation manipulates reporters into amplifying her desired message—in this case, down to the very word that The Atlantic’s Marc Ambinder used to describe an important policy speech.

The Oregon militia standoff continues, technically, as four people continue to occupy the Malheur National Wildlife Refuge. But despite their best efforts, helpfully documented in a series of idiotic YouTube videos, no one—not even the FBI—really cares anymore.

Katrina Pierson, a woman paid by Donald Trump to make himself seem wise and composed by comparison, appeared on CNN to defend her employer saying “pussy” into a microphone on the campaign trail. Her reasoning is unimpeachable.

After suffering yet another malfunction in New Hampshire last night, the slowly corroding motherboard that is Marco Rubio had a little visit from a few of his friends this morning.

The Daily Mail reports that Casey Anthony is going back to work: The one-time mother, who was acquitted of murdering her two-year-old daughter Caylee in 2011, has registered a photography business, Case Photography, LLC, in West Palm Beach, Florida.

Protestors briefly made a Ted Cruz rally interesting Monday when they staged a mock exorcism, a disturbance Cruz blamed on Bernie Sanders (?).

RAYMOND, NEW HAMPSHIRE—“It’s horrible! It’s terrible!” shrieked the two men as they staggered through the crowded Tuckaway Tavern, waving a cross and a mirror. “He’s too close to power! It’s a curse from the devil!”

In an appearance on Greta Van Susteren’s “On the Record” Monday, Donald Trump’s second son backed up his father’s proposal to ramp back up the United States’ practice of torture in the so-called War on Terror.

Whatever frantic hackathon Marco Rubio’s programmers conducted after Chris Christie demagnetized their creation on Saturday night seems only to have made the existing problems worse, as the junior senator from Florida stumbled through his stump speech on Monday. Maybe try turning it off and turning it back on again?

Apparently, at a campaign event in New Hampshire on Monday, a Trump supporter shouted out that Ted Cruz was a “pussy.” Trump had been criticizing Cruz’s torture policies.

Cliven Bundy will travel to Oregon to demonstrate against Ammon and Ryan Bundy’s incarceration, OPB reports. Last week, Cliven urged those militia members still occupying the Malheur National Wildlife Refuge to stand their ground—thereby contradicting Ammon’s wishes.

Rookie NYPD officer Peter Liang, who is charged with manslaughter and official misconduct in the November 2014 shooting death of Akai Gurley, testified in his own defense on Monday. “His eyes were rolled back,” Liang said of the mortally wounded Gurley. “He was just laying there very still.”

A little after 1 a.m. this past Saturday morning, Martin Shkreli did what he does more or less all the time now: he turned on his computer and began livestreaming on YouTube to his small but feverish fanbase. Normally Shkreli might strum his guitar or engage in inane conversations with his viewers, but this time, at least at first, something was different: a woman was sitting on his lap, and later she would use several needles in an attempt to drain a cyst above his elbow.