On Friday, Prince used his new Twitter account to share the amazing and perfect cover art for his single, "Breakfast Can Wait." Yes, it's a picture of Dave Chappelle holding pancakes, taken from the classic 2004 Chappelle's Show sketch.

Just a reminder: If your cable goes out before or during Breaking Bad, don't call 911.

Friday morning, a 22-year-old Indiana man survived being struck by an Amtrak train reportedly traveling 110 mph. The man suffered only a few broken bones, despite being thrown more than 20 feet from the track.

A dispute over three Cup Noodles containers at a juvenile correction facility in Florida turned into a four-hour riot Saturday night. By the time authorities regained control, eight juveniles had been injured and the facility had sustained “hundreds of thousands of dollars” worth of damage.

Lee Daniels' The Butler, the important if awkwardly-titled new movie starring Oprah, topped the weekend box office with just over $25 million. Kick Ass 2, the weekend's other major debut, was fourth with a disappointing $13.5 million.

An Ohio man thought he was just ordering a $1700 safe for his 24 long rifles and dozen shotguns, but little did he know it had already been stuffed full of nearly half a million dollars worth of tightly wrapped Mexican bud.

The Brazilian partner of journalist Glenn Greenwald was detained in Heathrow Airport this morning for nine hours, as he was transferring planes on his way back to Brazil from visiting filmmaker (and Greenwald confidante) Laura Poitras in Berlin.

A fifth Vanderbilt football player has been indicted for allegedly advising one of his co-defendants on how to cover up raping an unconscious student.

Gabby Williams is eight years old, but looks like a newborn. She is one of only a handful of people across the world who age at an incredibly slow rate, and scientists are trying to figure out why. Once they do, the discovery could help fight Alzheimer's, and even give us an aging "off switch," which would give humans the chance to stay the same age... pretty much forever.

Chris Christie announced Friday that he would sign a New Jersey medical marijuana bill only if it was changed to allow only sick children to consume edible marijuana.

Attention, Nation! Grizzly bears have been attacking hikers in Yellowstone, probably because they are mindless killing machines.

Michael Bloomberg, when he's not relentlessly coddling the overclass, is obsessed with criminalizing the underclass. After appealing a federal judge's ruling on the unconstitutionality of the stop-and-frisk police tactic, Bloomberg introduced the idea of fingerprinting everyone who lives in public housing, just so they can keep track of who the criminals are.

The University of Maryland plans to install 200 bulletproof whiteboards in classrooms to protect professors in the event of a school shooting.

A body armor mogul who threw his daughter a $10 million bat mitzvah with performances from 50 Cent, Tom Petty, and Aerosmith, was sentenced to 17 years in prison for his role in swindling $200 million from his company and its investors.

JPMorgan allegedly hired the children of important Chinese officials in order to gain favor when competing for important contracts, according to a new federal investigation.

TIME journalist Michael Grunwald just "can't wait" for the U.S. to kill Julian Assange through a drone strike. The Ecuadorian embassy/that entire block of British people are just necessary collateral, yo.

Where to begin? This training video for cooks-in-training at Wendy's in the '80s features not only a hard-rockin' theme song, but an actual scene where a burger cook-in-training gets sucked into a television and rapped to about how to best cook a burger.

Beezow Doo-doo Zopittybop-bop-bop has been arrested again on drug charges, only a year after his last run-in with the law.

Pei-Shen Qian, a Chinese artist whose acclaim in China faded once he immigrated to New York City, is at the center of a scandal that allegedly had him fabricate hundreds of paintings by prominent modernist painters, including Jackson Pollock and Robert Motherwell.