Axe body spray's new White Label line is targeting a more mature and refined class of virgins. "White Label products aim to help make men seem famous with such unusual fragrance notes as praline, star fruit, moss, fig and ginger."

The New York Times' readers have some opinions about the paper of record's piece on the Metropolitan Transportation Authority's new campaign against men who take up too much room on the subway, a practice which has been dubbed "manspreading."

What's that you say? Half of all marriages don't end in divorce, as has long been asserted? Divorces are, in fact, declining? No, I really did not need you to tell me that. What I could use, aside from some sympathy and a decoder ring for this parenting plan, are a few new things.

Richard Cohen is a dotty old racist newspaper columnist with the Washington Post and one of the worst professional opinion writers in America. More importantly: he's a man. A real man.

Sure, walking down the street as a woman comes with constant catcalls and unwanted attention, microaggressions that add up to an uncomfortable experience no matter how benign any single incident may appear. But have you tried being a man? It's awesome!

If you see a man sporting permanent stubble, it is appropriate to assume that he has character flaws that are very grave.

I walked into the main atrium of Best Buy Theater like Queen of the Dirtbags, a half-chewed slice of pizza in my waving hand and a vodka soda in my left, dangling down by my hip. Everything smelled like Clinique Happy perfume and ball sweat. For half a second, before crossing the threshold into the venue, I thought, Can I bring pizza in here?

Why is it that you think dudes who could kick your ass are huge, but you think dudes whose ass you could kick are teeny-tiny? Because you are not smart, haha, just playing, brother. You are not smart because of science.

Man has long grappled with the question of what to do with women once they step outside the sexually desirable age range of "eighteen" to twenty-six. They're around for some time after [fact-check this claim, please — Ed.], but why?

A massage therapist from Tampa, Fla. has spent $20,000 to get a third breast implanted dead center between the right one and the left one as a way to become unattractive to men. She claims that she isn't interested in dating anymore.

If you've ever been around women, you've probably heard them exclaim, "Oh! My back!" while grabbing their backs (which they just injured). Science has, at long last, explained why women are always like, "Oh! My back!"

Here's a story to boost your confidence in airport security and the overall safety of women everywhere: An apparently drunk, 53-year-old man was arrested at the San Francisco airport Tuesday after allegedly convincing two women he was a TSA agent and ushering them into a private area to give them pat downs.

Esquire magazine (Motto: "The Inactive Ingredients of Erection Pills, in Magazine Form") has a very important message to all the 42-year-old women out there: Esquire writer at large Tom Junod might like to fuck you.

A good rule of thumb if you're a man and you want to wear a "dress shirt" is, you put on the shirt and look in the mirror, and if you can see your nipples and also you are suffocating, the shirt is too tight. Well, your wife thinks it looks great on you.

Today, Richard Johnson of Page Six published a column on Jill Abramson's firing from the New York Times last week. It's very brief, summed up almost entirely in his first paragraph:

"Wow, you're super pretty. Wanna go on a date sometime?" said a man, walking around with no shirt on, to a woman, who was reporting live today from the site of a wildfire east of Los Angeles. All men must die.

Ladies of class and purity should read this story in the Christian magazine Charisma, "10 Men Christian Women Should Never Marry," warning of "The unbeliever," "The playboy," and other no-good men. But no-good men have their own things to be wary of.

That man you see above is holding a slice of Swiss cheese over his dick. He is currently driving around the Mayfair area of Philadelphia asking women to use the slice of cheese while jerking him off.

A new survey finds that male economics Ph.D.'s who get married early in their careers see their salaries grow 25%, while females who do the same thing see their salaries shrink by 23%. You can't argue with the free market, I guess.

With all due respect, if you write a book called The End of Men and then you write a New Year's listicle for Time called "Men Are Obsolete" that is "Adapted from her opening statement at the Munk Debate, 'Resolved: Men Are Obsolete,'" you may be in danger of becoming a one-trick pony.