Dennis Gabryszak is a New York assemblyman representing the state's 143rd district who very soon will no longer hold that job. Yesterday, three former female aides filed separate claims that describe how awful it can be for women working for powerful men. Among those claims:

Let us now turn to the very latest scientific research regarding the topic: What up, girl? Hey.

Important new research proves that drinking lots and lots of wine every week makes men have "stronger sperm." This means the sperm is more likely to reach its "goal," which is some part of a lady, if the sperm was ejaculated in the general direction of a lady.

The American Board of Obstetrics and Gynecology has laid down a hard line: no boys allowed.

Well, they did the research, ran all the tests, modern technology, all of that. Turns out all those women weren't lying about people staring at their boobs. Huh.

What you're looking at here is the largest analysis of the words we use on Facebook ever undertaken. Look at the words. They are you. If you're a man, you care about "fucking metal fuck girlfriend league wishes." Ladies, you're partial to "shopping excited love cute dress yayyyy." Blame yourself.

Yesterday we showed you David Gilmour, the University of Toronto English professor who told a female reporter that he is "not interested in teaching books by women." "What I teach is guys," Gilmour continued. "Serious heterosexual guys." Gilmour probably thought he sounded very serious and heterosexual while making this bold declaration—a real Ruff Ryder. Unfortunately, his colleagues and students are now calling him a buffoon.

The college professor who said in a recent interview that he is "not interested in teaching books by women" has a perfect explanation: "I was having a conversation, in French, with a colleague while this young woman was doing this interview. So these were very much tossed-off remarks."

David Gilmour is a singer in Pink Floyd. The less famous David Gilmour is an author and professor at the University of Toronto. That David Gilmour is, as of today, most famous for declaring that "What I teach is guys."

A new study found that college men who are not in fraternities are actually more likely to have "hypermasculine attitudes and hostility toward women," because frat bros are major pussies.

A sad new study proves that moms are the top earners in four of ten American households. It may seem like a positive thing that these working women are top earners, but it either means the woman is a single mother or that the "dad" is unemployed.

Esquire magazine's editorial philosophy can be summed up as "Booze, Bacon, Bourbon, Books, Broads, Boobs, and Bros Talking About Fashion But Uh, Not in a Gay Way." Actually, we're just giving them a hard time. The real editorial philosophy of Esquire, as stated by Esquire's UK editor, is simply: "Women are objects."

Good day to you all. It is time for "Hey, Science," our splendidly scientific weekly feature in which we have your most provocative scientific questions answered by real live scientists (or related experts). No question is too intelligent for our legion of learned persons, and the real winner is you, the public. This week, scientists answer the question: Why is there no male contraceptive pill?

Men: they are wearing beards now. Why? The WSJ's Tina Gaudoin has a theory:

"Just promise me one thing," my soon to be ex-husband says.

Working in journalism is, like life, harder for women than it is for men, what with the patriarchy and all. This point was driven home this week by Marin Cogan's New Republic story on the various sexual harassment-themed indignities of being a female reporter in Washington, and by the "Said to Lady Journos" Tumblr, which chronicles fun on-the-job remarks like, "Are you lost, little girl?"

Do you have a Y-chromosome and also a keenly refined rustic aesthetic? Are you eager to go camping but hesitant to put yourself in a position where you could ever be out-of-doors? Do you have $40 to blow on a hand-stitched "masculine, yet understated" leather keychain?

Women. Everybody loves them as much as they love shoppin', and boy do they love shoppin'.

Fellas. Fellas? Fellas. I know how it is out there on the "battlefield of love" in this modern world, so to speak: the rules have changed. It's hard to keep up with what's "politically correct" these days in the wild and wooly dating arena. Can you compliment a coworker? On her outfit? Or her eyes? Or her ass? Can you touch her ass while doing so? How about her tits? Is she allowed to drive? To vote? What are the "rules?" You'd need a spreadsheet to keep it all straight. Fear not, homeboys (slang for "friends"): here are the new rules of flirting.

Getting old is terrifying. That's probably why many men — concerned about gaining weight, losing their sex drives, and generally being schlubbier than they once were — are now turning to testosterone treatments.