Hey, has anyone seen Dutch stamp collector Willem van der Bijl? He went to North Korea in July to buy some of the country's stamps, and his family hasn't heard from him since. Oh! There he is! In the Pyongyang Times, extensively praising North Korean elections in a personal essay!

Meghan McCain would make an excellent 13-year-old. As a columnist, she is a thought-murdering demon of stupefaction. Today, she haz a sad about Barack Obama.

Who is behind hot new Twitter account @CondeElevator, which tweets supposedly overheard conversations from the likes of Anna Wintour, and accrued 32,000 followers in mere days? Gatecrasher says it's a Teen Vogue employee. Business Insider says the culprit is "about to get unmasked." ABC News says "it could be anyone." Update: And that it's "coming from one or more people at a '4-16' magazine, meaning, a title located between the fourth and 16th floors of Condé Nast,"for a fact."

In your brave Wednesday media column: the journalism job outlook is... okay, another News of the World arrest, Tavis Smiley is peeved at Obama, an editor flees the HuffPo, and Dick Cheney interview time approaches.

News Corp has a much-anticipated quarterly earnings call today, following yesterday's board meeting. The one (and only) real agenda item is to figure out how to move past the devastating UK phone hacking scandal—which means making sure it doesn't spread to America. Fortunately, News Corp has something going for it: best friends!

In your Molotov-y Tuesday media column: London is unsafe for journalists, Alec Baldwin likes newspapers, Time magazine is beating the piss out of Newsweek, News of the World staffers get severance offers, KING magazine remembered, and scientists vs. journalists.

In your untraceable Monday media column: News Corp's board meeting approaches, Current TV gets a new president, the backlash to The New Yorker's Bin Laden story, the NYT's online beta testing site, and newspapers are stolen.

Former New York Times restaurant critic and overall NYT star Frank Bruni was named an Op-Ed columnists last May, just after Frank Rich's departure. We had high hopes! We were promised that Bruni's column would be "a sharp, opinionated look at a big event of the last week, from a different or unexpected angle, or a small event that was really important but everyone seems to have missed, or something entirely different." How's that going?

Jeremy Baumhower produces radio tours, bringing musicians like Nick Cannon to major radio stations across America. Since Hollywood child bride Courtney Stodden is, ostensibly, a country singer, he contacted her using the email address listed on her website. The resulting exchange is comedic gold. Updated.

In your ferocious Friday media column: The Onion won't be free online forever, the Brits call for Piers Morgan, celebrity magazine circulation plummets, WaPo Co. revenue drops, and the New York Observer's back to broadsheet, baby.

Sad news for people who fondly recall childhood nights spent attempting to watch "scrambled" pornography on high-numbered cable channels, a pastime which has afflicted them with a lifelong wavy-bar fetish: the television porn industry is slowly dying. Which is completely predictable and represents nothing more than the logical progress of technology, but still. We thought you'd like to know, what with your... certain predilections.

In your simmering Thursday media column: Rick Sanchez pipes up again, CNBC's bizarre PR scandal, James Risen's judicial defender speaks, News Corp is flooded with lawsuits, and the WaPo's punchy editor is retired.

"In a startling new development," the National Enquirer writes, "[we have] learned that Chris Hansen had a SECOND mistress—a sexy Hollywood stripper." Low threshold for startle, I see.

In your mild Wednesday media column: HuffPo is coming for your teenagers, AOL's iPad magazine looms, Meredith Vieira is not an insane morning person, media redesigns of the moment, and journalists are good at everything.

Piers Morgan has repeatedly claimed—falsely!—that he never countenanced or encountered voicemail hacking during his tenure as editor of the Daily Mirror. Now Heather Mills has come forward to claim that a reporter for the Mirror's parent company confessed to her in 2001 that the paper had surreptitiously gained access to a voicemail message Paul McCartney left for her after the couple had a fight. The trouble for Morgan is that he openly admitted to having listened to that very voicemail message—recounting it in detail—in 2007. Whoops.

Those folks at the New York Post—love em or hate em, they sure know how to write a snappy headline! "Too many damn ho's." Is it a double-entendre on someone's name? Is it a play off of a direct quote in the story? Nope. It's just a straight up headline about how there are "Too many damn ho's" out there. Haha. And how!

Washington Post style reporter Dan Zak wrote a dispatch for the section's "Night Lives" column about D.C.'s Guardian Angels.

We've poked fun in the past at former New York Times editor Bill Keller's infrequent and bizarre use of the Twitter. But aren't there more ways we can make fun of newspaper editors, related to Twitter? Yes! Yes!

In your oppressive Monday media column: the Oprah to HuffPo career path, The New Yorker is digitally famous, the 48-hour magazine returns, PBS expands to England, and Peter Lauria goes to Reuters.

Starting today, New Yorkers with Time Warner and Verizon FiOS cable can watch Al Jazeera English for 23 hours a day through a subletting deal the channel reached with a suburban New York channel, RISE. [NYT]