The authorities instruct: If You See Something, Say Something. That's how they found the car bomb, you know! Of course, this is hardly practical. You see something every day in New York. When to actually say something? A guide, below.

Flying: it's not so hard, is it? Get on the plane and later, get off the plane. Still, some air passengers can't seem to avoid causing international incidents with their misbehavior. Below, a ridiculously simple guide to avoiding trouble.

Fameball 1.0 Julia Allison is allegedly quitting the internet. She may not resurface for days, or even weeks. It's a sobering moment. Let us now look back and remember three and a half years of highlights of Julia's unfiltered life.

Since this is my last weekend on the site until I return, begging for a job as James Del's assistant, I've invited some friends along. Lauren Leto is a blogger and the proprietor of Texts From Last Night. Lauren?

Since this is my last weekend on the site until I return, begging for a job as James Del's assistant, I've invited some friends to jam with me. Jessica Roy is an young writer finishing her BA at NYU. Jessica?

2001's Anthrax mailer, Dr. Bruce Ivins, killed five people and then himself. The FBI's closing the case file on him today. Interestingly, the guy hated New York. Sometimes, it sucks! But there are ways around this problem.

Vanity Fair's new Tiger Woods cover story doesn't have a Tiger interview, and its Tiger beefcake photos are all of pre-scandal vintage. It just makes us consider the tantalizing magazine story possibilities that are still waiting to be written.

"Another fucking Bono op-ed," a tipster astutely notes! The U2 frontman has Ten Ideas to Change the World, and they're in the Times' Op-Ed section "in the spirit of rock star excess." So how 'bout ten ideas to change Bono?

Foreign Policy has finally just ranked the years of our decade from hell.

Maura Johnston and Christopher Weingarten have completed the most painful listicle of all: F2K, a list of the worst songs of a decade of pain. Number one with a bullet, everyone! (Mayer wuz robbed!)

In your miserable Wednesday media column: Luke Russert tries some politricks, the New York Times tells black people what to buy, Lachlan Murdoch sells out, Time Magazine is unafraid to take a bold listicle stand, and a new Gatecrasher columnist.

Italian novelist Umberto Eco, the go-to intellectual for journalists worldwide, has deconstructed the human obsession with all things listy. The bottom line for editors: Your listicles help readers brush off a terrifying universe of infinite chaos.

Several large NYC landlords are moving to ban smoking inside their own apartment complexes, and on the sidewalks outside them, as well. Clearly, this violates our just-made-up list of Places People Can Always Smoke, No Takebacks.

After much deliberation, Microsoft has decided against sponsoring the upcoming Family Guy special, 'Seth MacFarlane's Holocaust Incest Tampon Hour.' They join an illustrious list of Family Guy haters.

Leighton Meester released her "first" single today on Ryan Seacrest's radio show. It is horrible. Just as every actor wants to direct, every female TV star wants to be a singer. It never ends well.

The Daily Beast, who know a good list idea when the news gives them one, recently ranked America's cities on how smart they are. Let's see how America reacted!

William Fitzsimmons, Harvard's dean of admissions, is taking questions on the New York Times' website. So far, 788 queries have been submitted. What do these questions tell us about American higher education? That it can make you crazy, times ten.

Sloane Crosley got a book deal by being the most popular book publicist in New York. Now, Sloane Crosley's book publicist has gotten a book deal herself. Taste the meta! There are only five other ways to get published now.

Vanity Fair's annual "New Establishment" list is out—the highly subjective guide to the 100 most important people in Graydon Carter's world. We bring you the highlights, below.

All the smart/ cowardly politicians bailed on the NYC mayor's race when Mike Bloomberg strongarmed himself back onto the ballot. But there is still a handful of comical challengers to our Mayor-for-life! Below, a guide to the losers.