When the government in the Australian state of Victoria asked for businesses to develop "a pleasant-tasting, attention-sustaining, low-priced drink that enables secondary school students to work safely and with sustained alertness all day," well, some old people got pretty upset! Education Minister Martin Dixon blamed the idea on kids, and told ABC Radio that no ministry funds had gone into the project, "but good on the kids for coming up with an innovative idea."

Every morning, schoolchildren in China have to do synchronized morning exercises. Usually these are boring calisthenics performed to a soundtrack of communist anthems.

With college increasingly derided as a pricey con, it's no wonder America's parents worry their kids will skip higher education entirely and try to get rich programming social networks or iPhone apps or whatever. Scary!

Researchers from the University of Minnesota have discovered that parents with active young children tend to neglect their own health and are therefore generally fatter than their childless peers. Ah, the perils of parenting! The results of the study were published today in Pediatrics, and in addition to other stats, researchers found that mothers with children under 5 years old on average consume 368 more calories per day than women who don't have kids. According to the AP, "With that many calories, women that age would need to be active to avoid gaining weight, walking more than 3 miles daily at a moderate pace."

The father-daughter singing team that brought the Internet down with their heartwarming version of "Home" are back, this time covering 4 Non Blondes' "What's Up? (What's Going On?)" Could they be cuter?

Conclusion? He'd buy 'em.

Let us take a break, now, from our daily diet of sarcasm and filth for a heartwarming tale: Nicholas Maxim, a boy born with arms that end at the elbow, won educational publisher Zaner-Bloser's annual National Handwriting Contest this year. A fifth grader at Readfield Elementary School in Readfield, Maine, he beat out 200,000 other grade schoolers for the quality of penmanship he produces by pinching a writing utensil between his arms.

Getting a board game is often a cruel joke when you're an only child. That is unless you can teach your dog to play with you.

Father of the year gets his child to practice his aim by telling him to hit the driving range ball retriever. An act that I'm sure the driver of said retriever really appreciates.

Divo extraordinaire Elton John is doing double duty on Saturday Night Live tonight by serving as both host and musical guest. The most surprising thing about John's monologue—besides his dressed-down look—was his knack for some parenthood-related stand-up comedy!

Three-year-old Jesse is crying because he's sick of being told he's too small to be the governor of New Jersey. I mean, he's already got the proper education under his belt...or so he claims. His first order of duty seems to be raising property taxes.

Poor three-year-old Jesse here can't stop sobbing in the car ride home, because people keep telling him that he's too small to be governor of New Jersey. By current New Jersey gubernatorial size standards, he is absolutely too small. But can't somebody make an exception? This passionate kid is volunteering to be governor of New Jersey, one of the worst jobs in America. Maybe he can temporarily fill in the next time Sandwiches runs off to Disney World. [via Buzzfeed]

If you're impressed by the vocal maturity of 22 year-old Adele, wait until you hear 10 year-old Britain's Got Talent runner up Connie Talbot cover the singer's hit ballad "Someone Like You."

Just when we start to forget our stereotype of college kids as racist partiers who will have sex anywhere, they go and have sex on the roof of a public building at USC and get caught on camera.

Why do your job when you have a perfectly good three year old to do it for you? And who cares if that job is operating heavy machinery, just let him have at it!

Three days after the internet shamed Ina Garten for rejecting a pediatric cancer patient's Make-A-Wish request to cook a meal with her, the Barefoot Contessa has agreed to fit a 6-year-old leukemia patient into her busy schedule. After twice rejecting Enzo Pereda's request, Ina is now pleading ignorance:

Chevelle doesn't need coffee or energy drinks like a few of us to escape that groggy feeling after catching some z's. Here she is after a nap turning a complete one-eighty after hearing some Kid Cudi.

It seems like this little guy is a bit young to be upset about his birthday but hey, none of us like turning a year older...At least his older brother is getting a kick out of it!

New York Times publisher Aurthur "Pinch" Sulzberger has some strange ideas about kids. While talking about the impending Times paywall, he offered a profile of the delinquents who will jump through elaborate hoops to beat the system: "It'll be mostly high school kids and people out of work."

Finally, an anthem for bed wetters everywhere. Apparently in 1990, a bunch of adults and children got together and created this soulful tune in which they refuse to pee-pee the bed tonight.