In Florida this month, the state board of education approved one of the most controversial sets of educational achievement goals the country has seen in quite some time. In an effort to close the racial achievement gap that plagues much of America, the board decided to use that gap to set parameters for what it expects children of different races to achieve over the next six years. Breaking from George W. Bush's "No Child Left Behind," which demanded uniform achievement goals for all students in an effort to avoid "soft bigotry," Florida is now going to have racially stratified educational targets in math and reading. In other words, black children performing more poorly than white children won't just be tolerated, it will be the rule.

Great bad movies are fueled by their ridiculous details. Miami Connection's are stellar to the point of bonkers. This is not just a great bad movie — it's a phenomenal one. The 1987 pulp movie played only in Orlando and then after being avoided, was forgotten. But now it's being revived by Drafthouse, showing in theaters all over the country including New York's Landmark Sunshine tonight. For sheer singularity, it merits reconsideration.

Speaking with CBS News today, several unnamed aides and advisers to Mitt Romney said the presidential candidate knew he was headed for a loss as soon as the polls closed, but was stunned by the outcome nonetheless.

This story is just about perfect: A West Boca Raton voter was barred from entering her polling place because she was wearing an MIT shirt.

A wild rhesus macaque that has been stalking residents of the Tampa Bay area for the past three years was captured yesterday in St. Petersburg after being tranquilized by trappers from the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission.

Only in Florida can a man show his testicles to the cops to get out of being arrested for public lewdness.

A pair of patrons at Paddy Murphy's Irish Pub & Restaurant in Orlando took their public display of affection a little too far when they started having sex in full view of other customers.

A Jacksonville, Florida couple just got into some serious drama over Alanis Morissette's music: Allen Casey, 24, hit his 33-year-old boyfriend, Todd Fletcher, after Fletcher allegedly refused to listen to anything but the Canadian chanteuse. Only listening to Alanis Morissettte really takes remembering the 90's to a whole new level. And c'mon, how did Tori Amos not make the playlist at least once?

A CVS store in Jacksonville, Florida, has been forced to call up customers who purchased ready-to-use enemas earlier this year to inform them that their medical device may have been previously used by someone else.

A giant 'softball-sized' eyeball washed up on a beach in south Florida yesterday, and no one has any idea what it belongs to.

Giving out what he thought was the number to the Florida Department of Health's toll-free, 24-hour meningitis hotline, Gov. Rick Scott inadvertently sent the residents of his state to obtain information on the deadly outbreak from a phone sex operator.

Edward Archbold, the 32-year-old South Florida man who died shortly after winning a live bug-eating contest hosted by a reptile store, downed "dozens of roaches and worms" over the course of four minutes to take home a $700 Ivory Ball python he hoped to sell to a friend.

Authorities in Broward County, Florida, are investigating the death of a man who won a local reptile store's bug-eating contest, which required contestants to eat dozens of live insects and worms for the chance to take home a python.

This woman will know, once she gets arrested.

Typical Florida political story of the day: an answering machine captured a call (embedded below) from a volunteer with the Republican Party of Clay County, FL, who was reaching out to potential voters with several important lies about the upcoming presidential election.

Representative Allen West (FL-22) and Patrick Murphy are currently engaged in what is shaping up to be America's most expensive congressional race, ever.

What good is a kids pool party without the constant fear of someone getting eaten?

What do you do to something you love? Give it hot dogs and beer, right? Wrong, guys, if that something is a dolphin.

Does president Obama have a 19-year-old son? Most people would guess, correctly, that no, the most powerful and famous man on the planet does not have an adult son whom you've never seen, and any articles about it are clearly satire. Not Floridians, though. No — Floridians want to know if the Onion article they've been forwarded is real.

You know that really damaging hidden camera footage of Mitt Romney that's making the rounds today?