Is 23-year-old Harvard dropout Mark Zuckerberg worth $3 billion, as ignorant slut Kara Swisher of AllThingsD believes? Or nearly $5 billion, as Valleywag has reported? Silicon Alley Insider's Peter Kafka has absolutely zero fresh reporting to add on this matter, but he says he wants a cage match between us to settle the matter. No way! That mean lesbian would claw my eyes out in three seconds flat. I'm glad she's wasting time in Hawaii right now instead of doing some real work. [Silicon Alley Insider]

Warner Music is threatening to pull out of Apple's iTunes, continuing the trend started by an angsty Universal Music Group. Record labels and Hollywood studios alike are upset by Apple's inflexibility on pricing. Warner's contract is up at year's end, and is considering a switch to a month-to-month deal, as Universal has done. [Washington Post]

I recently wrote that videogame developers can't follow in the footsteps of Radiohead and give away their wares for free. Wired editor Chris Anderson — known around Valleywag for his theory of the "Long Fail" "Long Tail" — disagrees. He disagrees with Valleywag — and with Wired. Anderson's "free games" manifesto, in which he argues for in-game advertising, virtual item sales, and shareware business models, has one severe flaw: he's talking about the games no one wants to play. In fact, he didn't name any titles, which makes me wonder if he ever plays. Mr. Anderson, I'll be glad to return to this debate if we agree to discuss games that are actually, you know, fun.

Apple wants you to know that the iPhone is 100 percent crotchsafe, despite Greenpeace allegations to the contrary. "Like all Apple products worldwide, iPhone complies with RoHS [Restriction of Hazardous Substances], the world's toughest restrictions on toxic substances in electronics," an Apple spokesperson told Macworld. But already, Greenpeace has responded saying that, whether Apple complies with regulations or not, it should still disclose its toxic materials, just like rivals Nokia, Motorola and Sony Ericsson already do.

Oracle executive John Wookey has left the software company, reportedly after a spat with CEO Larry Ellison. Anything to do with Oracle's recent offer to buy BEA — or a sign of trouble brewing with Oracle's next-generation version of superboring business software? Anyway, all we really care about is the spat. More spats, please! [eWeek]

Flyover country may now know Mark Cuban better for his quick hips and jazz fingers on Dancing With the Stars, but the Web entrepreneur still likes to talk shop. A lot. He found an ear or two on Friday when AllThingsD's Walt Mossberg interviewed him at an otherwise obscure conference in Providence, Rhode Island. There, he explained that most everything you think is going well isn't really. Sorry. Some choice quotes after the jump.

The offense: On September 25th, we posted an ad for our book. That ad featured a recreation of the infamous L. Ron Hubbard exploding Dianetics volcano, because, um, why not? And then we heard that T.V.'s Stephen Colbert, host of the alleged news show "The Colbert Report," went to the pop culture mines for the very same imagery to promote his own alleged book, as seen in the clip above. That bastard! I guess I'm supposed to challenge him to a greased-up round of Greco-Roman wrestling? What would Bill O'Reilly do?

Well, this is one way to deal with competition. Spotted, today, on one Silicon Valley office worker's iGoogle homepage, a link to the recommended how-to of the day, a detailed step-by-step process explaining how to quit spending time on Facebook. This could, of course, just be a random headline surfacing on the feeds. But we find it more amusing to surmise that Google is taking a preemptive strike against the social network before they lose all their employees to the next big thing. After the jump, the full screenshot.

Finnish mobile phone giant Nokia is buying Navteq for $8.1 billion. The company's mapping service powers Google Maps, among others — including the Google Maps application for Apple's iPhone, a competitor to Nokia's handsets. (That's an exceedingly roundabout attack on a rival, but it's so obscure it just may work.) Nokia also says it will provide many more phones with GPS capabilities in 2008. [GigaOM]

Last week Viacom CEO Philippe Dauman, anticipating the departure of Steven Spielberg and Jeffrey Katzenberg from their deal with Paramount, suggested that if the DreamWorks pair left that it would have no effect on the company's bottom line. Yesterday, the pair slapped back at Sumner Redstone's company, naming Tom Freston, who was Dauman's predecessor at Viacom, to the board of DreamWorks Animation. It's more a symbolic gesture than anything else—what's Freston going to do, not buy Facebook for DreamWorks?—but still, every now and then it's nice to see a big fat "fuck you" played out in public. [Variety]

Even on YouTube, Internet entrepreneur Jason Calacanis dogs the every step of Nick Denton, the owner of this blog. A promotional video for a new book from Gawker, a sister site to Valleywag, lists an interview with Calacanis as one of its related links.

Even with the controversial price cut and an impending European launch, the Apple's iPhone is so passé. Why? The entire Valley (or almost everyone) is convinced search giant Google is about to enter the telecom business in a big way. They just have no idea what way: A software platform? Their own handsets? A significant wireless services revolution using the wireless spectrum soon to be auctioned? No one seems to be sure, but — just as everyone was confident Apple could deliver a better, consumer-focused handset — they're also sure that Google will do something that will overturn the existing mobile apple cart. And do so in a way that others can capitalize for themselves unlike Apple who prefers to keep profits to themselves. And while some hope to see an unlikely battle between partners Apple and Google, what they really hope to see is one of these giants break down the walled gardens controlled by the telecom carriers.

If it's not a feud, it's a very strange friendship. News Corp. president Peter Chernin says, "We're the ones who should determine what the fair price for our product is, not Apple." He's speaking, of course, of the massive Fox library of TV shows and movies his company controls, and Apple's penchant for uniform pricing for video downloads. A translation of Chernin's comments: "We're staying put for now, but watch your a**, Steve Jobs." While Apple has sold 1 million iPhones and over 100 million iPods, its storefront is replaceable (Amazon Unbox, Microsoft's Xbox 360 Marketplace, Joost, etc.). Content partners like NBC are not. Apple best do what it can to quell this proletariat uprising before things get out of hand. What exactly would Apple do for its video iPods and iPhones if studios went on "strike?" Probably let users contentedly fill their devices with pirated BitTorrent downloads.

Apple's retaliatory Google ad, countering a Nokia ad and congratulating "late adopters" on getting a lower price for the iPhone? A fake. [Gizmodo]

After a 15-11 loss in an ultimate frisbee match against a team of scrappy Facebookers, disc-flinging Googlers swore revenge. But the social network left the search engine, again, unable to find victory, dishing out another 15-12 tromping earlier this week. "All that free food weighing them down," snipes a Facebook-employed spectator of the match. Other Facebookers are more modest, crediting the Googlers for strongly competitive play — though some believe the Googlers may have brought on ringers who don't actually work for the company. Word is the Googlers want another rematch. What, are they trying to go for 3 out of 5? Have they seen what happened to Orkut? (Photo courtesy of the Ultimate Players Association)

NBC is hurt, stunned and confused by Apple's recent bitchslap. Apparently the broadcaster didn't think Apple would call its bluff, and refuse to sell its new fall season on the iTunes Store. Initially balking at iTunes's rigid pricing structure — NBC executives have deluded themselves into thinking consumers will pay up to $5 per episode — and allowing its contract to expire, NBC is now "hopeful that we can reach a resolution before the existing contract expires," says spokesperson Cory Shields. Is that like trying to make up with your girlfriend before she moves out?

Nevermind stealing domain names from little girls, Hulu, NBC's and News Corp.'s bid for video marketplace domination, is now accused of "federal cyberpiracy." User-generated content tool provider Lulu.com, which also operates a a profit sharing YouTube clone Lulu.TV, alleges that NewCo has "intentionally attempted to create confusion in the marketplace" and has filed suit for trademark infringement and unfair and deceptive trade practices. [PR Newswire]

The Apple-NBC Universal spat continues. Shortly after NBC announced it wouldn't renew its iTunes contract, Apple decided to kick the upcoming NBC season off its digital shelves. In a counterstrike, NBC has announced its shows will appear on Amazon Unbox as soon as next week. Burnnnnn. [Ars Technica]

Mark Rubash, the Yahoo finance executive who recently left the troubled Web giant — this, despite having the favor of new president Sue Decker — emailed Valleywag to deny that he lost a turf war with Rachel Glaser. If anything, he won the turf war, he says, getting offered a job in which he would have overseen Glaser's group. Instead, he turned down the job and left altogether. He's now CFO at Rearden Commerce, a startup in Foster City. In his note, though, he leaves a tantalizing hint about Glaser.

After yesterday's hastily announced reorganization, there are, besides president Sue Decker, two executives at Yahoo who matter: Hilary Schneider, newly crowned queen of ad sales and partnerships, and Jeff Weiner, king of content. Not all Yahoos are happy about Schneider's ascension, though. When Schneider first joined Yahoo, she was handed Yahoo's floundering "marketplace" businesses — local ads, classifieds, auctions, personals, online stores, and job listings. Most of those were businesses Weiner used to run — and more effectively, insiders say, than Schneider did.