Well, HMMM: the New York Times Co. just announced that CEO Janet Robinson is "retiring." It's fair to call this unexpected. Try reading between these lines, from the NYT's own story:

The Obama White House can be terrible at leading the nation. It's been incredibly soft on Wall Street and often horrible on basic human rights. But it can stand proud on its family Facebook policy! At a time when American parents help sneak their legally underaged kids onto Facebook, Sasha and Malia Obama are quite sensibly told to stay away from the social network.

Chimp research! Bird safety! Nemo extinction! Raptor claws! Rat acid! Alkali oceans! Lemur meat! Dolphin jetpack! And real talk words of wisdom about our current chemistry debates! It's your Thursday Science Watch, where we watch science—with compassion!

Thanks to mildly encouraging small business hiring, mildly increasing consumer demand, and a mild uptick in the real estate market, economists and businessmen across America are becoming afflicted with "economic optimism," at least to the extent necessary to justify a USA Today "Money" section feature. Smell that? It's a course. We're back on it!

A Cincinnati landlord named Jamie Hein posted a sign on her apartment complex's swimming pool entrance which read, "PUBLIC SWIMMING POOL: WHITE ONLY." A few days later, discrimination charges were filed with the Ohio Civil Rights Commission by Michael Gunn, an outraged tenant.

So, you'd like to advertise in an iPad magazine? Ha ha, sucker. Sure, you can buy an ad, right in an interactive version of a fancy Condé Nast lifestyle glossy. But you're going to pay through the nose with surcharges, because you're a mark.

Christ-mandated baby-millers and stars of 19 Kids and Counting the Duggar Family coped with the loss of their twentieth, unborn child in a perfectly reasonable way: posing for a series of photos with its fetal corpse and handing them out to mourners at a memorial service. (They also posted the photos to their Twitter feed and blog.)

There is nothing worse than a Toys GRRRRR Us during Christmas, am I right? The only thing worse is when there is some lunatic in the store trying to slash people to bits with a light saber. We're lucky someone didn't get Darth Mauled. HA! Nerd jokes. I kill myself.

Minnesota's Rosemount High had an awesome idea for a prank at this year's winter pep rally. Just awesome: blindfold all the sports captains and have them make out with people. And the "prank" part is that they're making out with their parents. Who aren't blindfolded.

Thought Catalog, the Slate.com of urban 25-year-old creative writing majors (and their spiritual kin) who are incapable of being boring, is redefining the art of blog post writing for a new and vibrant generation. Today's "The Different Types Of People You See At The Gym" is but one example of the fresh, unexplored literary frontiers that they are, you know, exploring. What other types of posts can you find on Thought Catalog?

Exciting news for fans of the country's premiere cat-juggling competition, America's Got Talent. The Piers Morgan-shaped hole in the NBC reality show's judging roster has been filled with none other than self-proclaimed King of All Satellite Radio, Howard Stern. The deal was announced on Stern's Sirius radio show this morning, with Stern literally signing the contract on the air that would pay him an undisclosed amount (the rumor is $15 million), in addition to moving the show from L.A. to New York.

Hey everyone, Facebook just rolled out their new Timeline update to everyone. Better go clean up your Facebook past, because pretty soon it's going to be shoved in your face. What, you thought you were actually work today?

On the afternoon of September 29 in Allentown, Penn., according to police, a group of high school students who'd just been released from school were moving so slowly while crossing the street that they'd stopped traffic. Officer Jason Ammary attempted to deal with this pressing issue by "issuing verbal commands"; when that was unsuccessful, he approached a 14-year-old student named Keshana Wilson to "get [her] to move along." Ammary says she began to curse at him, "inciting the crowd," which Ammary determined to be an arrestable offense. This is where this video, taken by closed-circuit TV and obtained by the Allentown Morning Call, begins, more or less. (It's missing nearly a minute of footage, for reasons that are unclear.)

Singing dust speck Justin Bieber was pulled over for the third time this year in Los Angeles, and let off with a warning for the third time this year. Even cops are beliebers, apparently.

Like the first in this explosive, guns and skull ridden movie, the Expendables sequel is all about the cast. This ensemble group of all stars comes together in one throbbing, heaping helping of testosterone, making this about as actiony a movie as an action movie can get. It's a caricature of the ultimate action flick, like a Snakes on a Plane meta-movie in that everybody- viewers, actors and filmmakers alike- are all in on the joke. If Hollywood were a box of toys, each of these guys is an action figure from a different comic book or TV show that you love, who come together in the sandbox for the ultimate showdown. Chuck Norris is in this for God sakes.

Crazy homeless lady in training Courtney Love is about to be homeless for real because her landlord is evicting her from the $27,000 a month Village townhouse she's been living in since February. Apparently Courtney tried to burn the place down. Of course she did.

Columbia Journalism School kids exploring "The Elements of Style" in hip hop form? Don't make that rap video.

It's officially awards season now that the secretive geniuses at the Hollywood Foreign Press Association have announced the nominees for the Golden Globes, Hollywood's self-love and booze fest. The Artist appears to be the big winner, but that's not surprising at all. However there are some shocks to be had.

Fox News' orgy of on-screen error continues: On Tuesday, it confused Vermont with New Hampshire and Nevada with Utah. Yesterday it confused Barack Obama with Mitt Romney. And last night, as you see from the clip above, it couldn't figure out which number was bigger: 23 or 22.

One hundred and forty three—can that possibly be right?—yes, one hundred and forty three people have died so far in one town in India from drinking a batch of bootleg liquor this week. Police say the liquor was spiked with methanol to "boost its kick." That has the side effect of killing you. The AP reports: