The New York Post managed to corner penis guy Anthony Weiner on the sidewalk today!

After six months of trying to sell itself, animated GIF emporium MySpace has exactly one potential buyer, who only wants to buy part of MySpace, and at a very steep discount. This is getting rather pathetic.

Several outlets are reporting that most of Newt Gingrich's senior staffers for his presidential campaign have abruptly quit en masse. This appears to be what Beltway insiders call a "hilarious total implosion."

Next Thursday evening, June 16, Gawker is hosting a screening of Page One, Andrew Rossi's new documentary chronicling a year in the life of the New York Times media desk, on our roof deck. And we have an extra pair of tickets, just for you!

Elaine Davidson, the world's most pierced woman, got married yesterday in Edinburgh to Douglas Watson, a balding retired civil servant. God knows how this odd couple found each other, but isn't love grand? Let's take a closer look at her outfit.

You know what the problem is with the ocean? It's not overfishing, or global warming, or oil spills: It's branding. So you're an ocean? Who cares? You gotta sell it to us. You gotta have a powerful brand—a mascot. And that mascot has to be the giant squid.

Remember when Sarah Palin went on a bus tour into the Yankee North all last week? It was the other major political story of last week, the one that wasn't cockcockcock. Fortunately Sarah Palin has released an unusually well produced home video recapping the sights and stops of her trip, ensuring that future peoples will never forget about the 2011 Tour de Grift.

As June creeps on, school kids across the nation are getting released from the crumbling prisons that are America's schools and being sent off to life-guarding jobs, coal mines, or, if they're lucky, sleepaway camp. Not one of those lucky kids? Well here are some movies to watch that will make it feel almost like you're there.

Has Anthony Weiner's horrendous experience with Twitter prompted other members of Congress to post fewer illiterate riffs than usual to their own Twitter accounts? Top number-crunchers are looking into this. And the early stats of congressional tweet volume following Weiner's accidental cock missive suggest that... perhaps?

An ice cream shop in Missouri has been asked to stop making cicada ice cream after the health department found out about it. It wasn't such a big concern for the store, though, since Sparky's Homemade Ice Cream sold out of its only batch of the nasty stuff the day it debuted.

Video of a mutant bunny born near Japan's quake-ravaged Fukushima power plant has gone viral. The bunny, which was born without ears, might be evidence of radioactive contamination, which may someday render the entire population of Japan microtic-anotic! Unless, of course, it's just a random birth defect. Every credible scientist in the world is leaning strongly toward the latter. Crazy people, however, are leaning toward the former, so the mutant bunny will probably be on the evening news tonight.

Mitt Romney was a bad Republican last week. We'll tell you what he did, but first, send your children into the other room. Ready? He gave a big old bear hug to Science, by casually acknowledging that climate change may exist and humans may play some role in that. This is a calamitous "gaffe," and now everyone else in the GOP is trying to destroy him anew.

Citigroup discovered in early May that hackers accessed data on about 200,000 of its customers, including names, emails and account numbers, according to Reuters. Luckily Citi promptly notified customers one month later.

Kim Kardashian threatens to sue a tabloid and denies a football player's sexy stories. Scarlett Johansson is a pushy conversationalist. Emma Stone sucked her thumb until she was 11. Flo Rida gets arrested. Thursday gossip contains two truths and a lie, but which is which?

In the mid-90s, fancy Swiss bank UBS ditched Manhattan and moved its headquarters to Stamford, Connecticut. They did this because... (ed: check this). The point is, they fucked up, because the suburbs suck, so let's stop kidding ourselves.

38-year-old David Voelkert thought he was chatting with a cute 17-year-old girl on Facebook about his plans to track down and kill his ex-wife. Turned out to be his ex-wife.

This leading man's wife thinks he's just getting a massage, but he's really getting the full treatment. This Hollywood star harrassed his daughter's ex until he committed suicide. Gossip legend Michael Musto unleashes a fury of blind gossip. This can't end happily.

Life in a retirement community can be pretty bad for some people. But for elderly potheads, like the members of one California medical marijuana "pot collective" at Laguna Woods Village, it's not that bad! Or, at least it wasn't.

After assuming—from the looks of it, quite wrongly—that his ex-girlfriend had gotten an abortion, Greg Fultz spent $1,300 to have this unique billboard erected along a highway in Alamogordo, N.M. Now he and his silhouette-baby are Internet famous!

Unlike colleague Jon Stewart, who ignored the release of Anthony Weiner's cock shot on tonight's Daily Show, Stephen Colbert took to the Report this evening with a segment about the congressman's member and his apparent affinity for manscaping: "That's not just grooming. That's a scorched earth policy that's going on there."