Though the Metropolitan Museum's annual Costume Gala is considered by most to be the Oscars of the fashion world, the truth of the matter is that no one really focuses on the clothes. What really matters is which celebrities show up to WEAR the clothes and, of course, whether or not they're lookin' good. That said, all eyes were entirely focused on the recently friction-laden, reportedly squabbling super-duo of Team Cruise and Team Beckham, who reunited once again for the cameras. And despite the gushing show of admiration and respect that the Beckhams demonstrated for the the Hubbard-lovers on yesterday's Oprah, both Holmes and Beckham were allegedly competing for the spotlight last night. And in the end? The girl with the higher-slit dress tends to win every time. More photos from the event, including our picks for the best and most horrific looks of the night, after the jump.

All of the important pretty people got dressed up for the Metropolitan Museum's Costume Institute Gala, which was themed "Superheroes: Fashion and Fantasy." Vogue editor Anna Wintour wore the Karl Lagerfeld Chanel dress on the left. Of this creation, Australia's Age said Wintour "got it horribly wrong;" one blogger said it was "one of a kind... which is good because we don't need two of those;" and the diplomatic Times said it "had curiously curling crescents attached at the hips and the shoulders, giving Ms. Wintour... the fuller-bodied appearance of Botticelli's Venus on her clamshell." Ah, "curious," not the highest of compliments. Anna could use a break, what with the LeBron James King Kong cover, the Rodarte weight thing, getting dissed by European fashionistas, etc. etc. Sad, pitiable Anna. Laugh (at a few more media celebrities' outfits, starting with Katie Holmes, pictured right) through tears (for sad monster Wintour) after the jump.

Hunter College, the luxury brand Coach, fraudulent PR campaigns, and dishonest corporate collaboration with academia are the topics of the day today. Important topics! Adweek has just come out with a long investigative piece on a Coach-sponsored PR class at Hunter, which reeks of impropriety and dishonesty, and ended up tangling a bunch of college kids up in a fake online PR blog that makes them all look like a bunch of shady, dishonest undercover marketing hacks. "I knew a lot of hell would break loose about the class. And it did," said the teacher. Indeed. The condensed version of the whole sordid tale, after the jump.

See these flip-flops? They're not just any flip-flops. They're high fashion, "Married to the Mob" flip-flops, and they cost $42. Can you spot the reason why this is stupid? That's right: you pay ten times what you would pay for a plain pair of flip-flops, in order to have a brand name which is covered by your foot when you are wearing them. I imagine fashion snobs must just hang these flip-flops jauntily over their shoulder instead of slipping them on their feet, so that the logo can shine freely. In fact, the entire idea of paying extra for name-brand flip-flops is a bit ridiculous. But the price tag can get much, much worse than $42. Allow us introduce you to PechePlatinum—the "World's Most Expensive Flip-Flops."

According to hipster meta-mag Vice's fashion issue, street fashion in New York City these days is all about looking like dark, weird eccentric richies, with Edie Sedgewick and Olsen twin looks popular amongst the girls. Either that or androgynous: "so now, for the third year running, we want to officially say that you pretty, well-adjusted, rich fashion fuckers have ruined the Smiths for real fans, so fuck you." For boys, it's still tight pants and plaid. (We've noticed. Sigh.) [Vice]

Shepard Fairey, a.k.a. OBEY, the artist and graphic designer who plastered the world with "Andre The Giant Has A Posse" posters and is perhaps the biggest thing ever to happen to wheatpaste, is reportedly going blind. Fast. One source says he could lose his vision by the end of the year. Bucky Turco at Animal NY has the scoop. Sad news.

Everybody knows that the only people who really know how to walk in heels are six-foot tall gay men. Therefore, fashion muse and New York eccentric Andre J, who has made it ever since he ended up on the cover of French Vogue in a beard and a dress, is teaching the ladies how to work it. It's a four week program that costs $500. Classes are once a week for two hours. Turn to the left! Turn to the right! [via Fashion Bomb] After the jump, a little clip of Andre performing in heels—just so you know what you're paying for.

You know what they say about hemlines and recessions? Well look no further than What Happens In Vegas co-stars Cameron Diaz and Lake Bell for optimism. At last night's premiere of their comedy, the two actresses seemed to be playing a game of Anything You Can Wear I Can Wear Shorter, alongside somber co-star Ashton Kutcher, who seemed to be playing a game of You Were Right, Demi. Without You I'm Boring And Cannot Dress Myself. Between the grieving Diaz and the toothy Bell, see who revealed more gam and why we're happy they did, after the jump.

Singer M.I.A., featured in the ads for designer Marc Jacobs' spring collection: "The whole time I was doing that campaign I was like, 'Does Marc Jacobs know who I am?' He didn't let me into his parties and stuff six months before.... I have my own label now, which is the only thing I've been wearing recently." [WWD]

The Dermatologist-Sunscreen Industry cabal is trying to kill us all! They want us to be pale, shivering closet cases, scared to venture outside for fear of being melted by the sunlight, like bloggers. Luckily, the fearless Indoor Tanning Association is here to bring the truth to light, ha. The group, which represents the major industry of Long Island, is running an ad in USA Today decrying the health nuts' attempts to "wrongly scare people out of the sun." They point out that a little sunlight gives you Vitamin D, which protects against many cancers! Except the skin cancer you got from being out in the sun. After the jump, the Indoor Tanners' press release [via AgencySpy], with the type of foolproof logic you would expect from those who spend hundreds of hours under artificial radiation lamps:

Gwyneth Paltrow was certainly on a roll when it came to revamping her ice queen image with repeated appearances in bad girl ensembles revealing all kinds of T&A. And we did appreciate the fact that she earnestly tried to justify her new call girl look by explaining that she sucks so hard at the whole acting thing. But at last night's Iron Man premiere in LA, we fear Paltrow's hit a speed bump when it comes to comprehending exactly what "sexy" means. Last we heard, wide-legged jumpsuits showcasing only her clavicle and shoulder blades weren't topping the lists of most male fantasy outfits. But despite falling off the hotness wagon temporarily, Paltrow did manage to pose for a photo that won't exactly improve the week of drug tape-addled Angelina Jolie, baby mama to Paltrow's former fiancé.

Michael Roberts, the Vanity Fair fashion and style director who attributed the uproar over the sexy Miley Cyrus photos to unsophisticated Americans who don't handle "chic pictures" as well as his fellow Europeans, is not just dispensing cultural criticism through the media: he has a book coming out! And in a fun coincidence, the 112-page tome is going to be called Fashion Victims: The Catty Catalogue of Stylish Casualties, from A to Z. Perhaps he'll add a section addressing the fact that "The whole kiddie porn prurient angle seems to be worryingly sour grapes from other magazines that didn't get a picture like this." After all, at Vanity Fair "We don't do cheesy teen pictures. We do chic pictures and pictures that are beautiful portraits." Alrighty then. Just for kicks, another now-ironic quote from last October's Telegraph profile of Roberts:

These new jeans may be a turning point in the evolution of pants. It goes like this: first, baggy jeans came into style. People bought big pants and let them sag. Then, baggy pants slowly went out of style, and tight pants came into fashion. But still—people missed their baggy pants. Fast forward to this moment in time: a company called Soulful Commandoe has introduced jeans that are both tight and baggy at once. This breakthrough was apparently achieved through the addition of several vertical inches of fabric in the waist area, as well as the inclusion of some gratuitous suspenders. Truly a development that will go down in fashion history. Click through for some larger pictures [The Gluttony via Satchel of Gravel] of this Pants Pants Revolution:

Michael Roberts (pictured, probably pointing to something refined and beautiful) was the fashion and style director on Vanity Fair's creepy Miley Cyrus shoot. And instead of letting the fiasco die out quietly, he spoke out to WWD to reveal the real reason behind the outcry: sour grapes, and a bunch of American clods with an insufficient sense of sophistication! Europeans aren't like that, he'll have you know:

Gwyneth Paltrow has finally explained what recently inspired her to drastically change her uptight, ladylike English countryside demeanor into that of a high-class hooker using flashy props like kinky boots and see-through ass-grazing dresses. You know that standard awkward adolescent phase girls go through in middle school when they start painting on their mom's lipstick and wearing mini-skirts so the boys will notice them? Well, according to a recent interview with British GQ, Gwyneth is officially going through that phase right now: "Paltrow admits she suffers from a lack of confidence...she is desperate to change her public image...'People think I'm aloof, or cold, or that I breathe rarefied air - that's not me'." So what exactly turned the former It Girl into a Debbie Downer?

"This design concept jacket from Lunar Design aims to turn your torso and neck into a walking anthropomorphic digital display. The Blu Jacket would be made of flexible, organic e-paper: potential applications are displaying advertisements and broadcasting your mood, as well as more mischievous aims like virtual streaking." Bigger pic, and sad news, after the jump.

The formerly primmer-than-thou Gwyneth Paltrow's slow and steady progression to kinky-boot-wearing siren has hardly gone unnoticed by the press ever since she began promoting her summer blockbuster Iron Man. But up until now, the sexpot look has mainly been limited to her wildly high, frighteningly strappy S&M-style footwear. Now, she's officially moved on to wearing entire ensembles devoted to showing the world (and the industry) that her uptight rep is long gone. So why use short skirts and lacy, skin-tight dresses to woo the paparazzi? We're guessing Paltrow's picked up on that old-fashioned Hollywood formula used by many an actress looking to catch producers' eyes: a few flesh-baring public appearances can go a long way towards jumpstarting a recently lackluster career.

We were going to hate on this prototypically obvious Thursgay Styles piece about how some women wear dresses even though shockingly unfeminine "trousers" are the next big thing (Katharine Hepburn could not be reached for comment) but we ended up being kinda charmed by it because basically it's Spring and it's getting nice out and Guy Trebay quotes that bit in Citizen Kane where Mr. Bernstein talks about the girl on the ferry. Are we going soft? If it helps, the piece on how men are wearing patterns that clash on purpose suitably annoyed us. Anyway: pants! On girls! That'll be the day! [NYT]

We've always tended to label the polished, well-spoken Gwyneth Paltrow as one of those overly perfect women you want to hate but, irritatingly, can't muster up any good reasons to. But thanks to her recent habit of promoting Iron Man across the globe while wearing some of the most fierce, outlandish, downright kinky pairs of shoes, we officially have no desire to hate the girl anymore. From Rome to London to New York, Paltrow's wildly varied kickers range from towering 7-inch beauties to strappy lace-up ankle booties. And we (well, I) want 'em all. A closer look at Gwyneth's racy choices after the jump.

Bruce Oldfield was once famed for designing glamorous outfits for Princess Diana. His latest project: McDonald's uniforms. All the jokes seem too obvious. While the brand will certainly get a bit of a positive halo effect for being associated with a high-fashion guy who would otherwise never set foot in the place, I can say confidently as a veteran of the McD's kitchen that Oldfield's expressed wish, "I hope they enjoy wearing the uniforms," will not come true. Sorry. And is it necessary to inflict a "jaunty neck scarf" on women working the register? The most important quality of a McDonald's uniform is that it's dark enough to hide grease spots. All this upscale designing is a waste of time, we're sorry to say. Click through for two more picture of Oldfield's highly paid work on behalf of the fast food proletariat: