[Via Metafilter, here's the infamous poster of a made-over Führer from a Sicilian clothing company's ad campaign. Pink is just not really his color, is it?]

On top of her myriad problems, Lindsay Lohan now has to wear a blood-alcohol monitoring SCRAM bracelet. How is one of America's favorite fashion plates going to pull off such a thing? We have some ideas!

Some writer for the Washington Post was able to churn out 1,100 words on the fact that Elena Kagan dresses like the middle-aged professor that she is. What does it mean that Kagan is totally unstylish? Let us explore.

A Sicilian advertising agency rolled out 18-foot posters of Hitler in pink uniform across the capital city, Palermo, to promote a teen clothing line with the slogan: "Change Style—Don't Follow Your Leader." Some people are quite angry. [Telegraph]

In your competitive Tuesday media column: the fashion mag ad race is heated, GQ manages to sell electric doo-dads to people somehow, Michael Wolff's beef parade marches on, and the NYT rocked by "getting a good political story" scandal.

Japan's embattled Prime Minister Yukio Hatoyama, sitting on a 24% approval rating at home, may have done himself in by wearing a multi-colored plaid shirt that has pissed off the entire country. That, and his wife is totally nuts.

When a Calvin Klein underwear model's time comes, do they, like, get shipped off to a small Midwest town where they can do crunches in blissful anonymity? No, the tale of the first Calvin Klein underwear model is tragic.

Jes Sachse is a 25 year-old Canadian model and artist who has Freeman-Sheldon syndrome, a genetic disorder that's left her with a curved spine, uneven legs, and a partially paralyzed hand. She's also the best fake American Apparel model ever.

"Fuck the brands that are fucking the people," declares this trade magazine ad for American Apparel, a company run by Dov Charney, who is literally fucking the people. [Copyranter at AnimalNY. Click to enlarge.]

As the ideal male figure slims down to a wriggling indie nothing, so too must boy fashion mannequins. It's a new trend! A 27-inch-waist mannequin will soon hit our shores, sending all but the twinkiest into a shame spiral. Payback?

[Kobe Bryant, here dressed as a color-by-number gentleman farmer, is likely to spend the next few weeks wondering what he was thinking when he agreed to a photo shoot with the L.A. Times Magazine.]

As suspected, Marc Jacobs and Lorenzo Martone haven't broken up; they're getting matching tattoos!

The Federal Trade Commission said it investigated Ann Taylor for trying to influence bloggers with gifts. The FTC took no action, its announcement publicized questions about blogger payola. Namely: Since when does a big-name retailer offer such crappy bribes?

Interested in being Donatella Versace's intern for a semester? For a mere $20,000, the job can be yours. And she'll even throw in a t-shirt and a bottle of perfume.

"I love the masculinity of it. It's sort of the bad-ass fur," said one fashionisto. "Tougher than mink," cooed another. The new 'it' fur is nutria, the 20-lb. river rat that headlines the "World's Biggest Rat" sideshow at Coney Island.

To Heidi he's "Top American fashion designer, Michael Kors!" but to us he'll always be the guy who can whip up an insulting metaphor faster than you can say "crazy crotch." Seven seasons worth of Kors' best put-downs inside.

Instead of casting size 0-2 runway models this fall, Calvin Klein's using comparatively obese size 2-4's. Is this like the time they shifted sizes down so vain average people would feel skinny, and skinny girls would be nothing at all?

Magazines are in trouble. Fashion is expensive, but we're broke. Americans aren't as purty as the celebrities are. Not to worry, impoverished unattractive celebrity-worshiping American magazine consumers! A magazine just for you is a wild success.

Not satisfied with conquering just the fancy clothes market, freewheeling libertine Marc Jacobs is now opening a book store, called Book Marc, across the street from Magnolia Bakery. How many copies of Maurice will there be? Many, hopefully. [Racked]

Crocs lost $227 million in the past two years. The bad news: Crocs still exists.