Former North Carolina TV newsman Jon Robinson is more interesting than most TV newsmen: "What I really wanted to say [on air] is, 'I shot heroin last night and smoked crack and watched eight hours of pornos.'"

Yes. Eleven god damn pounds of coke, he tried to buy, in Florida. Allegedly! He and two other guys were arrested last week, and now the DEA has released its version of the story, in which a snitch told them earlier this month that Buju et al "wanted to purchase kilogramme amounts of cocaine in the Sarasota area of the Middle District of Florida." Yea, while you're in Sarasota, pick up some coke, k? So the DEA stone cold set them up, undercover style. Allegedly:

The UN's chief drug-fighter says billions of dollars in drug money saved the global economy from collapse last year. Sounds kind of plausible, doesn't it?

Steven Seagal: Lawman combines a really really boring episode of Cops with a washed up, overweight, out of work actor. Even with his fat suit on, he's bound to get recognized by the people he arrests. And it is awkwaaaard.

On December 5, 2009 at Charlottesville, VA's John Paul Jones Arena, one man, one pound of shrooms, and not one ounce of clothing came together to defy conventional logic and make a Phish show worth watching.

An Italian court convicted Amanda Knox for murdering her study abroad roommate; four American teens have been arrested for a roadside prank that turned near-fatal in Japan. America, it's time to stop screwing up on foreign soil. Here's how.

Billy Joel's daughter with Christie Brinkley, singer-songwriter Alexa Ray Joel, rushed to St. Vincent's, is there in stable condition. An AP source cited overdosing on pharmaceuticals, speculating a suicide attempt. A publicist has a stonewall, saying they're "assessing her needs."

In a town hall meeting today, a student asked Obama if legalizing drugs, prostitution, and other awesome things would stimulate the economy. Obama, ever the square, totally shot him down. Dammit.

It's like how Jesus is always appearing in pieces of toast in Argentina! Change we can eat and stare at the ceiling for hours on. Thank God this didn't come out during the election. [Boing Boing]

Here's video of Marilyn Monroe in the late 50's smoking a dooby with some friends in New Jersey. That is one happy dame!

New Jersey, a small state hidden under New York City, appears ready to legalize medical marijuana. Maybe before the end of the year! About time. The West Coast is kicking the East Coast's ass at legal weed.

You think that the animated holiday specials we all grew up with were just teaching you about Santa and presents and winter wonderlands? You're wrong! They were sending you hidden signals both excellent and devious. Here is the ugly truth.

Kudos to the Washington Post for its Style section feature today on Med Grow Cannabis College. Who ever heard of such a thing?! Wait. The New York Times had it when? Saturday? This past Saturday? Fucking fuckity fuck.

NY1 news anchors: Cursed? Portly (former) political anchor Dominic Carter ruined his own career by beating his wife and trying to squirm out of it by name-dropping. Now, another anchor's dad is critically injured in a crack pipe fire.

There's a menacing new drug around. And it's called... meow meow. Really. The press in Australia and Britain, who love a new drug they can moralize about, say it's deadly and legal and kids are all doing it.

It's safe to say the Twilight sequel has been thoroughly exploited at this point: Baggies of Twilight-branded heroin featuring drawings of the movie's characters have now turned up on Long Island. [TMZ]

Here, an new animated short video celebrating the day that Pittsburgh Pirates pitcher Dock Ellis threw a no-hitter while blind-tripping on acid. Truly one of the greatest American drug accomplishments of the 20th century. Learn your history, kids. [James Blagden]

Some dude in Brooklyn has been arrested for selling weedheads some gross thing that would probably make you puke so much.

The American Medical Association—the doctor lobby—has fought health care reform tooth and nail throughout its entire existence. Until like last week! Maybe this explains their change of heart: they are all high on mary jane.

Self-proclaimed dermatologist to the stars Arnold Klein is not to be trusted, but he sure tells good stories, like the one about the time he rebuilt Michael Jackson's nose, and how celebrities like to pee in weird places.