The completely fabricated demand for Quentin Tarantino's Inglorious Bastards — the subject of white-hot, Weinstein-fueled media speculation until a real phenomenon worth covering came along — is reportedly entering the realm of fact on its way to a deal at Universal. Variety notes today that the Weinsteins may partner with the studio for a 2009 release; few other details are available except that Paramount is/was the second choice of Tarantino and Harvey Weinstein and, of course, a conveniently planted reminder that Tarantino met with Brad Pitt in his recent casting quest.

Time now for a round of blind item armchair detective. In today's wistful case, brought to us via Twitter user Ronen V, a TV personality is spotted during a vulnerable moment while browsing the affordable Johnson & Johnson-shaped products at a dollar emporium:

Considering the free-lovin’, liberal personalities of two undergarments-fearing stars like Woody Harrelson and Kate Hudson, we were a bit surprised to hear rumors that Woody is “relieved” and happy now that Kate is out of BFF Owen Wilson’s love life for good. Janet Charlton is reporting that “Woody and Kate NEVER got along, but they put aside their differences for Owen...[Woody] never thought she was the right girl for him.” So why would these two hippie dippy celebs find it so hard to get along? After a bit of digging, we came up with three theories, from Woody’s big-screen debut alongside Goldie Hawn, to the skinny-dipper’s habit of setting Owen up with mystery blondes while he and Kate were still together:1. Woody Was Owen's Personal Madam: Back in March 2007, when Owen and Kate were still in Phase One of their double act of a relationship, Wilson reportedly went on a Hawaiian vacation with his partner in paparazzi-bashing crime Harrelson, who owns a crash pad on the island. And the first sign of trouble in paradise came when Wilson was said to be hooking up with a Kate-lookalike coincidentally introduced to him in Hawaii by the Woodster. 2. Woody's Bare Butt Possibly More Scrumptious Than Kate's: And who can forget the, well, unforgettable sight of Harrelson's own set of natural born relationship-killers: the buns seen 'round the world while skinny-dipping with Wilson on a mid-Marley And Me, mid-Kate & Owen: The Sequel jaunt to Miami. Even Kate herself has pointed out her own lack of assets, and no matter how straight the Wilson is, who wouldn't be distracted from their current paramour's figure when face-to-ass with that behind?

· Mad Men's second season opened to a strong start for AMC, pulling in 1.9 million aspiring womanizers and the pregnant secretaries who love them. [Variety] · The Venice Film Festival announced its slate, which will include world premieres of Darren Aronofsky’s The Wrestler, Jonathan Demme’s Rachel Getting Married, Kathryn Bigelow’s Hurt Locker, and the Coens's Burn After Reading. [Variety] · Deposed New Line potentates Bob Shaye and Michael Lynne's first post-studio-snuffing project will be an adaptation of Isaac Asimov's sci-fi epic Foundations for Warner Bros. The duo have an eye on adapting the book's sequels into a Lord of the Rings-style franchise, with Andy Serkis playing Andromeda, a kindly robot, and the speed of light. [THR] · CBS is developing a pilot for updated version of The Streets of San Francisco. We humbly request they retain those cool diagonal stripe-wipes from the title sequence. Those rock! [THR] · Mutinous SAG splinter-group Unite for Strength agrees with the current leadership that the AMPTP's offer is unacceptable, but differs strongly in other areas, such as where they'd like to order in lunch. (Koo Koo Roo, vs. the Alan Rosenberg-championed Chin Chin.) [Variety]

High School Musical trilogy star Ashley Tisdale appeared to be cool as cucumber after a 5.8 earthquake rocked the Los Angeles area. Tisdale admitted that she was a bit startled by the shaking in her home, but her caffeine related headache was far more painful. Tisdale said, "It was kind of like a ride at the fair, but my headache just made it unbearable to stare at lights or do anything. Earthquake or not, I need my Hazelnut. My headaches are worse than earthquake, trust me."

Look, just because we want to see the guy locked up for crimes against our (and most others') childhoods doesn't mean we despise George Lucas. We're getting there, of course, but there's no denying that beneath that wavy tuft of white hair and sprawling wattle is a thoughtful, brilliant, self-made billionaire whose accomplishments as a single father aren't far behind those of the Star Wars franchise he clearly so yearns to destroy. Which is why a revealing London Times profile of Lucas has us so torn today. Yes, we can accept Lucas's preoccupation with raising a female cagefighter by himself as a likely contributor to Howard the Duck's downfall. Fine. But, no — no, no, no — we cannot believe he actually thinks Indiana Jones 5 is an idea worth squabbling over with anyone, let alone Steven Spielberg:Really, though, [Indiana Jones 4] was a challenge getting the story together and getting everybody to agree on it. Indiana Jones only becomes complicated when you have another two people saying ‘I want it this way’ and ‘I want it that way’, whereas, when I first did Jones, I just said, ‘We’ll do it this way’ — and that was much easier. But now I have to accommodate everybody, because they are all big, successful guys, too, so it’s a little hard on a practical level. “If I can come up with another idea that they like, we’ll do another. Really, with the last one, Steven wasn’t that enthusiastic. I was trying to persuade him. But now Steve is more amenable to doing another one. Yet we still have the issues about the direction we’d like to take. I’m in the future; Steven’s in the past. He’s trying to drag it back to the way they were, I’m trying to push it to a whole different place. So, still we have a sort of tension. This recent one came out of that. It’s kind of a hybrid of our own two ideas, so we’ll see where we are able to take the next one.” Wow. Just as we think that's a thinly veiled acknowledgment of the film's inarguable awfulness, we know it portends a billionaire battle royale between Spielberg's hoary throwbacks and Lucas's planned '70s-era LeBeouf showcase Indiana Jones and the Doomed Left At LaBrea. With another trillion at stake (give or take; according to the still-active Indiana Jones PlunderWatch Ticker™), here's hoping for an inevitable resolution we can all tolerate through nubby, ground teeth.

Popular actor Gerard Butler was not in the mood for surly comments about his filmography while out clubbing in New York City. The Nim's Island star heard a mixture of cheers and jeers as he hopped from hot spot to hot spot. Briefly waiting to get into a club, Butler said, "It's either 'Tonight we dine in hell!,' or what was with P.S. I Love You. Don't get me wrong, it's good to have fans, but sometimes you don't want to be reminded of the past when you just want to go out and hear some Katy Perry and have fun!"

Only three years ago, Blake Lively was just That Blonde Girl from The Sisterhood Of The Traveling Pants, and America Ferrera was just the Token Dorky Sidekick. Alexis Bledel and Amber Tamblyn, on the other hand, were bonafide TV stars. My, how things have changed. With the film's sequel debuting next month, we take a look at how each of the leading ladies has done career-wise since the original racked up nearly $40MM at the box office in 2005. While there’s a bit of bad news for the original's biggest stars, there’s an alternate way of looking at this role reversal: any actress’ status as the perennial “buddy” can obviously change with one little show that could.Blake Lively/Bridget: With only one credit behind her before the first Pants, 1998’s Sandman, Lively got her big break as Bridget the jock. Even though no one knew who she was at the time, she built her buzz by appearing in a few cheesy movies like the Justin Long vehicle Accepted. But now, thanks to Gossip Girl and its sultry appeal (ratings be damned!), Lively is arguably the boldest name on the sequel’s marquee. America Ferrera/Carmen: Cast as the not-so-pretty one who most magically fit into the same jans all four girls kept handing off, America is obviously the biggest success story when it comes to acting cred (an Emmy), ratings (Ugly Betty), and general public appeal (we don’t even want to think about counting how many magazine covers with the hed “America The Beautiful!” she’s appeared on in the last two years). Amber Tamblyn/Tibby: Having blown away TV critics as the lead in Joan of Arcadia the same year Pants came out (and racking up Golden Globe and Emmy noms along the way), Tamblyn was a shiny bright new fixture on the circuit. But the only notable film Tamblyn has appeared in since? The Grudge 2. Oops. The only reason we can think of for Amber’s dimming star? Michelle Trachtenberg. Sort of the more telegenic, tabloid-friendly version of Tamblyn, with all sorts of Pete Wentz/Ashlee Simpson sloppiness to keep the kids entertained. Alexis Bledel/Lena: Pants came out at the height of Gilmore Girls’ gooey success, just before new writers took over and turned the show into an even faster-paced linguistic mess of confusion. And Bledel was the biggest draw among all four, cast as the “pretty” one with the heftiest romantic plotline and most cinematic backdrop (finding love in Greece). But the only upcoming flick on Bledel’s radar at the moment — aside from Pants 2 — is a comedy with Michael Keaton (which would've been a great gig in the late 80s, but today? Not so much). And the last time we saw her out and about was at the 2006 fashion shows alongside then-boyfriend Milo Ventimiglia — while Milo’s struck gold in Heroes, Alexis has yet to find a similarly cozy rebound gig. [Photo credits: Getty]

Well, hopefully by now you've mixed yourself a nice cocktail to settle the post-earthquake jitters, didn't climb behind the wheel of an F-150, and are not currently in need of hand surgery. With everything seemingly still standing—even that wobbly nightstand that holds our framed, signed Eugene Levy headshot—we thought we'd celebrate with QUAKE '08: The Survivors' Stories, courtesy of your de facto natural-disaster-coverage destination, CNN. We particularly love the guy in the record store, contemplating his own narrowly avoided foot-mangling beneath a toppled rack of Gypsy King CDs. We also have video of KCAL's breaking news report after the jump, which confirms what we knew all along: This earthquake lasted a really long time! UPDATE: Some toppled streetlights and broken pipes have been reported. An official press conference on the rumbler is underway. UPDATE #2: More damage: We have a sighting of broken jars of pasta sauce being mopped up at the WeHo Trader Joe's!

Clearly bored with the twins, absentee star Jennifer Lopez is set for a busy run of on-camera distractions in the months ahead. And perhaps needless to say after her '07 run of dodgy, self-produced dramas, the output to come promises a veritable bounty of romcoms playing to the constituency that will finally get J-Lo over that $100 million hump. Or maybe the $25 million hump — any hump, really, would likely satisfy producer Bob Yari, who's bankrolling The Governess this fall:

Not since Donald Sutherland unleashed a spittle-flecked torrent of anti-Hillarian propaganda in The Huffington Post—denouncing the candidate's "wretched illegitimacy," as if she had ruined Canadian Thanksgiving by pulling off a rubber Kiefer mask to reveal her cackling identity beneath—have we been so shaken by a celebrity-penned attack on a Democratic candidate: National Treasure: Book of Secrets star/estranged grandfather Jon Voight has dared to zig when the Obama-loving free world zags in the op-ed pages of the Washington Times:

We interrupt your daily nonsense feed to report an earthquake, estimated magnitude 5.8 and centered 29 miles east-southeast of downtown L.A., just scared the shit out of you for what felt like an eternity. LATimes.com was down for a bit but was back up. Land line and cellphones are down. Developing...

With its enshrinement as The Greatest Film Ever Made safely assured and its box-office trajectory soaring ever upward, The Dark Knight is now being groomed for a spot so exclusive that it only changes hands once per decade: The highest-grossing film in history. Feel free to take the news with a grain of salt, seeing as it came from the notably math-challenged John Horn in today's LA Times; even so, it's hard to argue when Knight is looking at $400 million by this weekend and Titanic sits idle at the dock with $600 million. Seriously — $400 million in two weeks. But as we note after the jump, that last hurdle might be taller than it looks.Observers attribute the record haul-to-date in part to the same repeat viewers who bumped Titanic to No. 1; turnouts among "older moviegoers, families, Latino and African American audiences" are higher than normal as well. And last weekend, anyhow, The Dark Knight enjoyed the advantage of weak competition. Those days are over, though, with the execrable Mummy 3 nevertheless looking at a $50 million opening this Friday and Pineapple Express and Tropic Thunder set to usurp their own cuts of DK's marketshare in the weeks to come. By comparison, Titanic had 15 weeks at number one — most in the late-winter studio dumping grounds of early 1998, as Horn points out, and aided heavily by its inexorable march to Oscar glory. Similar factors could dovetail in unique ways for The Dark Knight, though, as its proximity to both the fertile July market and this fall's more prestigious film crop means Warner can revive its Terry Gilliam-endorsed Oscar chatter just in time to stretch DK's long tail into awards season. Call it Phase 2, even if Warners distribution boss Dan Fellman takes the high road with Horn: "We are honored to be considered in that company. But I think Titanic will hold that record for eternity." Don't sell yourself short, Dan! Or, more importantly, don't underestimate a James Cameron sabotage campaign — we're already seeing evidence of a conspiracy online. That's when you know you're a phenomenon.

Breaking! It now emerges that Shia LaBeouf may not have been completely at fault for his DUI accident: "L.A. County Sheriff's Department spokesman Steve Whitmore said the investigation suggests that another driver may have run a red light, hitting LaBeouf's truck. That driver was cited at the scene for running a red light." Do you suddenly find yourselves confused about how to feel? If a drunk driver gets hit by a red-light-runner at Fountain and LaBrea, flipping over his three-ton truck in the process and necessitating hand surgery, does it make a sound? We'll let you ponder these imponderables as we attend to a specially designated Ethical Dilemma Boston Cream Donut. Mmm...morally ambiguous cussstarrrrrd. [LAT]

Mario Lopez, the dimple-cheeked actor who first rose to prominence playing the deeply conflicted Albert Clifford 'A.C.' Slater on the Chekhovian scholastics drama Saved by the Bell, has been announced as the new host of Extra. As we mentioned yesterday, ratings were declining steadily for the syndicated celebrity newsbite service; Warner Bros. was therefore looking to drop its current hosts (Mark McGrath, former lead singer of the Afro-Caribbean-flavored pop outfit Sugar Ray, and Dayna Devon, who apparently is not Nancy O'Dell) in favor of something fresher, absier, and more Eva Longoria-accessible. Weekend co-host Lopez fit that bill: "'He will be a fresh and dynamic presence, and we can't wait for him to assume his new role,' said senior exec producer Lisa Gregorish-Dempsey." Look for new features like the VitaminWater presents Extra's Live! From the DKNY Beach House!, and the Mario Lopez's Knockout Fitness Gym Couture Fashion Report.

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It's been two days since Shia LaBeouf's early-morning DUI accident, in which the well-liquored star of the latest Indy Jones installment was sent hurtling through the air in his three-ton, American-built pickup truck (360 views, specs, and color options available here) at the corners of Fountain and LaBrea. As it turned out, the only thing his heavy-duty ride had picked up that evening was his Transformers sequel co-star, Australian actress Isabel Lucas. While her reportedly miffed boyfriend Adrian Grenier was unforthcoming with status updates, we have it on good authority from the fine people at TransWorld News press release syndicate that her rep "can’t confirm anything...but I have been informed she is at work, on the set of Transformers and is fine.” Phew! We can't confirm anything, either, but we're informed we're extremely relieved for the young actress.Witnesses from the crime scene have since emerged, including passerby Brian Perrulli—aka Tobey Maguire's long-lost goth twin—who recalls a bystander recommending LaBeouf flee the scene (perhaps after placing a floormat over the vehicle and hoping no one noticed it?). But as he told Access Hollywood, Shia was having none of that:

We have all kinds of fun ideas for how Lionsgate can splurge with its new $340 million credit line, a kind of shocking development considering Wall Street's recent exodus from the deadly film-financing racket. The budget-minded 'Gate, having leapfrogged from one genre hit to another (accruing a $331 million cash war chest along the way, according to Variety) is evidently immune to the crunch, however, even nabbing a 2.25% interest rate we haven't seen since our very first student loans.

I have to admit I didn't know that people actually physically picked up and visited and/ or moved to New Zealand just because they loved the Lord of the Rings movies. This is a fact, apparently, but what's the rationale? Hoping to run into a fantasy battle scene? I don't see it. Nevertheless, Australia is now planning to use a movie to lure in similar hordes of easily manipulated child-like Hollywood fans. If you go there you'll probably have sex with Nicole Kidman!

Balthazar Getty anxiously paced the arrivals section of LAX on Monday. The Lost Highway star said that usually his wife picks him up from the airport, but since all the recent nastiness involving Getty and British bicycle Sienna Miller, she might be getting some revenge on him by leaving him stranded. Getty said, "What's that line from Airplane? Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue? Well, replace 'glue' with 'cheating on my wife' and that about sums this situation up." Getty paced around awhile before hopping on an Enterprise Rent-A-Car shuttle.