“This white, 53-year-old mother hadn’t counted on God sending an African American with dreads named Glenn.” A Christian blog post headlined “When God Sends Your White Daughter a Black Husband” is just as good as you would think.

You don’t have to read too close between the lines to see a heathen peeking out.

Chicken-sandwich chain Chick-fil-A—a God-fearing corporation led by people unafraid to speak out against gay marriage—opened its first store in New York City in October. Just months later, on Christmas Eve of all days, the city slammed the restaurant with six health code violations, leading managers to close the place down for almost a week. Coincidence? Or godless liberal conspiracy?

Liberty University’s president this week raised some secular eyebrows when he urged his Christian students to start carrying guns. Now there’s a reasonable explanation: haters “lacking knowledge about the true character of God.”

Real-life comic book villain Rupert Murdoch emerged from the algae-encrusted slime cave he dwells in on Monday to give his sage musings on the news of the day.

The good thing about class consciousness is that you begin to realize that no matter how long you went to school, your problems are fundamentally the same as all the other people whose bank account balance is as low as yours.

Lynchburg, VA—Amos 5:24- But let justice roll on like a river, and righteousness like a never-failing stream.

Kim Davis, the clerk of Rowan County, Kentucky, continued to deny marriage licenses to same-sex couples Tuesday, in defiance of the Supreme Court’s direct order that she do so. Davis, an elected official, had asked to be excused from that part of her job on religious grounds. The Court denied her appeal Monday.

Rick Santorum—a rust-belted Pittsburgher who has embraced the Petrine church ever since he stopped being pro-choice in his first congressional election—is smeared in penitence and frothy with faith, and he will show this pontiff who’s supreme.

You may have heard about the Billings teen who could face charges for killing his best friend with an “heirloom” revolver after the friend tapped on his window in the dead of night. But what do you know of 10 dead bears, sheep eradicating ragweed, and a lawsuit over the Garden of Read’n Christian bookstore?

Perhaps you’re concerned about the rise of Islam in American life. Or the rising influence of evangelical Christians who express concern about the rise of Islam. It may surprise you to learn that America’s fastest-growing religious demographic is people who just don’t give a shit.

To some, a pentagram might just be the thing behind that naked guy in the Rush logo, but looking at this school bus's brake lights, one concerned parent in Tennessee saw something far more sinister: a Satanic conspiracy against our precious children.

You might accept Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and savior, but do you take him serious? If not, you should probably watch out for Pastor Eric Dammann, who admits to straight-up socking a kid as hard as he could for "playing games with God."

In-N-Out Burger employees in Redding, Calif., reportedly asked this Bible-carrying gentleman to stop holding the door open for customers and either buy something or leave. He chose a secret, off-menu option: Come into the store and explode in an Animal Style supernova of obnoxious rage.

Devout Christians looking to spread the word of God sometimes need to get creative about where they're preaching—after all, anywhere could be the right place to convert an unbeliever. So why not discuss Bible verses with the guy you've invited over to fuck your wife?

The American Family Association, a fundamentalist Christian group, has shared a press release with its members urging them to refuse any mail that arrives with Harvey Milk's likeness. The USPS announced the Forever stamp honoring Harvey Milk last week.

Harry Anderson from Night Court is starring in a movie in the best new genre, College Freshman Destroys Atheist Professor. The movie, A Matter of Faith, is produced by the group that runs the Creation Museum. It's out in September.

Happy Passover! Here's "That Jew Died for You," a bizarre video depicting Jesus on his way to a gas chamber in a Nazi death camp with some Polish Jews. It comes from Jews for Jesus, an evangelical group that aims to convert Hebrews in apparently the most off-putting way possible.

Last year, when it was announced that International Business Times had bought the shrinking Newsweek brand, some media organizations started asking questions about IBT's connection to a shady Korean-born Christian minister. Now we have some new, weird info on that connection.

There is nothing in the world of journalism more delightful than a stupid opinion piece published in a college newspaper. What race, gender, or religious group will be hilariously insulted by an undergrad this week?