This week the Chinese are celebrating their Communist Party's 90th by buying it a sentimental birthday card, taking it out to Shoney's for the breakfast buffet, then swinging by J.C. Penney to get it a nice new cardigan sweater and some comfortable slippers.

This video is simply unbelievable: Buildings, mountains and trees materializing in the mist over the water, following a heavy downpour at dusk. Witnesses couldn't believe their eyes. I couldn't believe it either. But cameras don't lie, right?

Two and a half months after his imprisonment on charges of tax evasion, internationally-renowned artist Ai Weiwei was released by Chinese authorities because (according to state news agency Xinhua) "of his good attitude in confessing his crimes as well as a chronic disease he suffers from" (likely diabetes or hypertension).

Mark Amodei has won the Republican nomination for the upcoming special election in Nevada's second congressional district. Congrats, Mark! How is he celebrating? By making this dumb ad about the Chinese Communist Army taking over Washington D.C., unless he's elected as America's newest congressional backbencher.

The Telegraph reports on a teenager in China who allegedly sold his own kidney to afford an iPad 2 and iPhone. He told reporters that he had found an advertisement online that offered 20,000 yuan ($3000 US) for a kidney. So he made the journey to the city of Chenzhou in Hunan Province where, he says, a hospital cut him open, plucked out the organ, and paid him for his time.

Some Chinese hackers may have been reading top U.S. officials' email for a while. Google says they've thwarted a phishing campaign that targeted the Gmail accounts of politically sensitive targets.

What on earth could be cuter than a pair of baby ligers (the product of a Manchurian tiger mother and African lion father)? What about... those ligers being raised by a dog, alongside two of her own pups? This particular adorable multispecies family hails from the Xixiakou Wildlife Zoo in Shangdong, China. Unfortunately, two other liger cubs died of malnutrition after being rejected by their mother, but their siblings are apparently on the road to health, thanks to their adoptive mother.

North Korea's lesbian chic leader Kim Jong-Il just arrived in China. He's there seeking solutions to his country's "chronic shortages of food, fuel and other necessities." (Translation: "Sunglasses shopping spree!")

Today on Lavish Gifts That Make Me Uneasy, China has agreed to provide Pakistan with 50 JF-17 fighter jets — or roughly the equivalent of a new pony for a 7-year-old girl. It's a direct outcome of Prime Minister Gilani's visit to Beijing this week, a four-day jaunt intended to send a clear signal to the U.S. that killing Osama bin Laden without so much as texting them first was totally not cool. ("Humiliated" was the word Defense Secretary Robert Gates used to describe them.)

A Chinese Twitter user with the handle Hanunyi is being hunted by police after he threw eggs (miss) and his shoes (hit) at the computer scientist Fang Binxing, the architect of China's Great Firewall. He live-blogged the whole thing.

A rash of inexplicable watermelon explosions has stricken melon farmers in eastern China. Experts are baffled! Is this the start of the coming apocalypse?

Under a nice Global Times headline, "World's oldest panda kicks bucket," we learn the sad news that Ming Ming, the world's oldest giant panda bear, died of old age at the Xiangjiang Wild Animal World in China on May 7. She was 34.

A "near-riot" broke out in the crowd at a Beijing Apple store on Saturday, a day after the iPad 2 went on sale, sending four to the hospital and smashing a glass door.

Facebook is very likely about to move into China. But when Facebook.cn launches, don't start friending Chinese users unless you're OK with Chinese censors peeking at all your party pics.

First they take our jobs, now our space! China is planning to launch a 60-ton space station by 2020. Look for the 2016 presidential campaign to feature plenty of fearmongering ads about the Red Menace Above.

What were we all thinking these past few completely hilarious weeks as we watched NBC television character Donald Trump become America's most prominent and vigorous birther? It seemed like he was driving the issue with maximum enthusiasm, as though it was the only issue that mattered to him and should matter to anyone, and that he wouldn't rest until the mystery of Obama's birth was settled. Yet it turns out that he never really wanted to talk about this stuff — it was the idiots in the media who kept asking him about it. He wants to talk about China!

Facebook is considering censoring content in some countries because it is "uncomfortable" offering excessive amounts of freedom to some people. The next time you start sympathize with a beaten or jailed protester, try imagining how that violence makes Facebook feel.

Outgoing U.S. Ambassador to China Jon Huntsman, the moderate Republican ex-governor of Utah who thinks he can win a GOP presidential primary after a two-year stint working for President Obama, is facing more conservative mockery after his 2009 "love letter" to the president was leaked last week to Tucker Carlson's Daily Caller. Who could have leaked a private handwritten note to President Obama only? We'll let you gumshoes figure that one out!

Every morning, schoolchildren in China have to do synchronized morning exercises. Usually these are boring calisthenics performed to a soundtrack of communist anthems.

Chinese government censors have issued new guidelines that essentially ban television programs that feature time travel as a plot device. I really wish we could do this, because there is no deus ex machina more overused or annoying than time travel.